A Thai Escort Girl In London

Lar Gon

2007-11-15T06:31:00.001-08:00

Yesterday was a horrible day. The worst day of my life. I had sixteen customers. The first one came at eleven o’clock in the morning. The last one left at three o’clock. Only one didn’t want sex. Five wanted anal. When Leif came to get my money he wanted oral and I did what he wanted. I don’t care any more. It’s as if my body doesn’t belong to me any more. Now it is as if everything that happens is happening to someone else and I am just watching it.

I am too tired to do any laundry and too tired to clean my apartment. I hardly have time to eat. Most of the time I eat noodles that I buy from a small shop near my apartment. They are like MaMa noodles which I eat in Thailand but they are made in Japan. They don’t taste as good as MaMa noodles but I don’t care. I haven’t eaten watermelon for a long time. I hardly have time to eat when I am working. The customers keep coming, like a flood that I can not stop. Before, when Oliver ran the agency, I would call him after each customer to say that he had finished and then I would wait for him to call me about the next customer. But now Natalie calls all the time to tell me that my customer’s time is up and then I have to tell him to go or he has to pay me more money. And then Natalie tells me that I have five minutes or ten minutes before the next customer comes. Sometimes a customer will ring the bell before the old customer has gone so I have to tell him to hurry and once I had to put one customer in the kitchen until the new customer was in the bedroom. I can not complain because if I complain then Natalie will tell Eric and he will punish me.

After the last customer goes then usually I fall asleep on the sofa, without even showering. I feel dirty all the time. Dirty inside and outside. My insides hurt all the time and I think my itch is back. Sometimes when I go to the toilet there is blood. Not too much but it is blood. I want to go and see a doctor but I don’t want to ask Natalie for time off because I know that she will tell Eric.

When I fell asleep I had bad dreams, and then Belinda came to talk to me. She was covered in blood and one of her eyes was half closed and she was crying .I couldn’t tell what she was saying to me because she was crying so much. Then she screamed ‘Nancy!’ and I woke up.

I was shaking because the dream was so real. I phoned Nancy and it took her ages to answer the phone and when she did she sounded really sleepy and I could tell that something was wrong. I asked her what had happened and she was mumbling about Eric and her baby. I said I’d go to see her and I couldn’t hear what she said so I just put on my coat and ran over to her apartment.

I kept pressing her bell but she didn’t answer and then I phoned her again and I think she was asleep but she woke up and buzzed me in. I had to bang on the door before she left me into her flat and I could see right away that something bad had happened. She had a bruise on her eye and her chin was red and on the coffee table there was a bottle of sleeping tablets and bottle of whisky. I asked her what she had done and she was so sleepy she couldn’t say anything. I knew what she had done. She had swallowed lots of tablets and whiskey.

I didn’t know what to do because she was dying and I couldn’t call for an ambulance because they might tell the police and then Nancy would get into trouble. I tried to get her to drink water but she was too sleepy and she lay down on the sofa and curled up. Then I phoned Vince and he said he would come right round and he did though by the time he got there Nancy was hardly breathing.

Vince said we had to keep her awake so we carried her to the bathroom and we all stood under the shower with the water cold and then she woke up a bit. Vince told me to make coffee and while I was in the kitchen he made her sick by pushing his fingers down her throat. She threw up a lot and the bathroom was a mess but Vince said we had to get the tablets out off her stomach because once they were all in her blood then she would die. We made her drink the coffee and then we kept her walking around and around and talking to her. Vince said she would be okay, he said if she had swallowed Paracetemol then she would have poisoned her liver but sleeping tablets were okay if you got them out of the stomach. After four hours or so Nancy wasn’t so sleepy but she was crying a lot. She said that Eric had beaten her up and that he had told her that she had to get an abortion. She said that Eric had found out that she was pregnant and she didn’t know how because it was a secret but I know how. I told Laura and she must have told Eric so what happened to Nancy was all my fault. She said that Eric went to her apartment and said that she was a whore and pregnant whores can not work so he would get Natalie to take her to a doctor who would take the baby out. Nancy said that she wanted to keep the baby, even though she didn’t know who the father was, but now she had no choice. She started crying again and said that she wanted to die. I told her not to be silly but actually I understood how she felt.

Vince left us in the morning and I lay on the bed with Nancy, holding her. Then at eleven o’clock in the morning Natalie called my phone and said that I had a customer and I had to go. I took the sleeping tablets and the whisky with me. When I went Nancy said that she felt better but I felt worse.

The customer wanted anal and he was very rough. I had no condoms but I didn’t care, I just lay on the bed and let him do what he wanted to do and thought about Daeng and how much I missed him. The customer left without saying anything and I got up and sat on the sofa and cried and cried and cried. I phoned Daeng and told him that I loved him but that was all I could say because I was crying so much so I hung up.

So that is it. That is the story of my life so far. Now I know one thing for sure and that is that I can not carry on like this any more. I have done enough. I have done more than enough. My family has the house now and there is enough money in my bank so I have done what I set out to do, I have taken care of my family.

I keep looking at the bottle of perfume that Laura gave me. It is Belinda’s magic perfume, I know that for sure. Before I thought that maybe Sandra had killed Belinda but now I know for sure that it was Eric because he gave the bottle to Laura. Eric is not scared of anybody. He is the most dangerous man that I have ever met in my whole life. I do not know why I have ended up in his power. Maybe I did something wrong in a previous life and this is the price I must pay.

I think that maybe what Nancy tried to do was not such a bad idea. At least if you are dead then no one can hurt you. I have Nancy’s tablets here and I have counted them. There are thirty-four tablets in the bottle and I think that will be enough for what I want to do.

Eric will never let me leave. He will never let me go and live with my son in Udon Thani. He will work me until I am dead. I know that for sure now. He wants me to be his slave. We are all his slaves now. No one can help me. I am sure the police can not help me and the Thai Embassy can not help me. Even if I run away Eric’s friends in Thailand will hurt me and my family. There is no escape for me.

There is only one way that I can end this. There is only one way that I can make the pain stop and now I know what I am going to do. Nothing can stop me. I have to do what I have to do. I have decided and nothing now can change my mind.

My name is Pornthip. That is my real name. Now I don’t care if anyone knows who I am because I am not ashamed of who I am or what I am going to do. Now I have to say Lar Gon. That is Thai for Goodbye. Please do not think I am a bad girl for what I am about to do. I am not a bad girl. All I ever wanted to do was to help my family and to give them a better life. That is why I did this job in the first place. It is not my fault that everything has gone wrong and my life has been ruined. So now I will say Lar Gon. Good bye.

Tired, tired, tired

2007-11-14T05:37:00.000-08:00

I can’t go on like this for much longer. It is too much. I am working too hard. I am tired all the time and I know that if it was not for the cocaine I am taking then I would not be able to stay awake. Now I have to buy cocaine from Vince every day. That is £200 a day I have to spend.

Last night I went to see Robert. I was so pleased when Natalie called to say that Robert had booked me for three hours outcall. I was very tired when I went to see him because I had already seen six customers but I didn’t take cocaine because my time with Robert is always easy time. I took him £5,000 to pay off some of the money I owe him and he was so surprised. He gave me back £1,000 for my fee and my tip, which was sweet of him. We went into the kitchen and he made me a peanut butter sandwich and a chocolate milkshake. He asked me if I was okay and I lied and said that I was because I do not want him to know how much trouble I am in. I know that he would want to help me but I think that Eric is a very dangerous man and I think he might hurt Robert if he thought Robert was a problem. I do not want Robert to be a problem for Eric because Robert is a really nice man. We went into the bedroom and Robert licked my toes and stroked me and I tried to relax but all I could think about was how terrible my life has become. Before I went home I hugged him tightly and said ‘I love you, Daddy’ and do you know, actually I think I do love him. I wish he was my Daddy and that he could make everything all right for me but really I do not think anyone can do that for me.

As soon as I got home more customers started to come. One after the other. You know, now I have seen so many customers that I can not remember their faces. Usually I do not even ask them their names now. I do not send any texts any more at night. I am too tired. Some of my regular customers send me texts saying they miss me and asking if I am okay but I don’t reply any more.

At two o’clock in the morning Leif came for his money. I had £850 for him but he said that wasn’t enough. I said no, he could check the book and £850 was half of what I had earned. He said that Eric had decided that we should give him £250 extra every day for the cost of advertising and protection. That was the new rule. I said that wasn’t fair and he hit me. Really, he slapped me across the face. He said life wasn’t fair and that I was lucky that Eric let me keep anything because I was just a whore. I didn’t cry even though my eyes filled with tears. I just nodded and said okay because there was nothing else I could do and I gave him another £250. Then he told me to give him oral sex and I did. I wanted to bite, bite, bite and hurt him the way he hurt me, but I didn’t. I did what he wanted and then he went.

Candy, Nancy and Wanda all called me during the night, crying. They all said that it wasn’t fair that Eric was now taking half of what we earned plus £250 but they all said that they were too scared to do anything. They all said they hated working every day, too. Before we used to have Sunday’s off but now every day is a busy day. We never get time to relax or have fun, it is just work, work, work, sex, sex, sex. We are all trapped. We are like farm animals now and we have no choice, we have to do what the farmer wants because the farmer has the power of life and death over his animals.

Perfume

2007-11-13T10:47:00.001-08:00

I bought more condoms yesterday. Now I use more than a dozen every day, sometimes twenty or more. I had to buy soap powder, too, and shampoo and soap and KY Jelly. I use a lot of KY Jelly now because I do anal three or four times every day. I don’t know why English men like anal sex so much but a lot of them do. I have never heard of a Thai man wanting do that. I think they would think it was dirty.

At two o’clock in the afternoon Natalie phoned me and said I had to go to Laura’s apartment to do ninety minutes incall. I had to wait until Laura was free because she already had a customer and I had only been in her flat for five minutes when the new customer came. Laura said it was her fourth customer already that day. She said she has been really busy since Eric took over the agency and is making more money than she ever dreamed about. She is right. When Oliver ran the agency I made about £300 a day profit, sometimes £400, but now almost every day I make £800 or £900. We are making more money but we are working too hard. My insides hurt all the time now, though it doesn’t hurt as much when I take cocaine. And I am so tired when I wake up in the morning. It’s like I never get enough sleep. I hardly ever phone Daeng any more. I know that he will be able to tell how tired and sad I am and he will ask me when I am going back to Thailand and I don’t know what I can tell him. I don’t think Eric will ever let me leave.

I took a bit of cocaine before I went to see Laura and I was glad that I did because the customer wanted lots of sex. He was fairly young, maybe twenty five, and he said that he was a property developer and that he drove a Ferrari and had big house in Surrey which is where rich people live. I don’t think he had taken Viagra but he was very strong and made love to us both in lots and lots of positions. He said he loved Asian girls because they would do anything and I wanted to tell him that I only did anything because Eric had said that he would hurt me if I said no but I didn’t say that.

We used lots of condoms and at one point we ran out and Laura told me to get some more from the drawer by the bed and I did and that was when I got a shock that made me shake. You know what I saw in the drawer? It was the small bottle of perfume that Belinda had - the magic perfume that made men fall in love with her. I am sure it was the same bottle because I recognised the Khmer writing on it. I took out the condoms and closed the drawer and then the customer put on a new condom and made love to me. I was a bit scared when I saw the perfume bottle in Laura’s drawer because I know that Belinda and Laura were not friends so I know that Belinda would not have given her the bottle. That means either Laura took it from Belinda’s flat or someone else took it from her flat, and whoever took it from her flat might have killed Belinda.

After the customer left I had a shower and when I came out of the bathroom I was so shocked because I saw Laura taking heroin. She was doing what we Thais call chasing the dragon where you put heroin on a piece of silver paper and heat it with a cigarette lighter and then breath in the smoke. I have never done it, ever. Heroin is a very dangerous drug. Laura said that it helped her relax and that she smoked heroin two or three times a day. She asked me if I wanted some and I said no.

The customer left about fifteen minutes early but we didn’t phone Natalie right away, we just relaxed. We don’t get much time to relax since Oliver left.

We talked about Nancy because Nancy had phoned Laura to say how unhappy she was and I said yes, she had been crying with me, too. I said that it might be because she was pregnant and Laura was surprised because she didn’t know that Nancy was pregnant. I said it was a secret and Laura said that was okay, she wouldn’t tell anybody.

Laura said her young sister was coming to work in London. Her name is Tip and she is eighteen years old. Laura said Tip was applying for a student visa and if she got the visa then she could start working for the agency. I was really surprised because I hate the agency and I hate what I have to do but Laura she doesn’t seem to mind. I can’t believe that she would want her young sister to do this job but she was serious. She said if Tip could get her own visa and didn’t need a contract then she could earn a lot of money. In just two months she could earn enough to build her own house. I think there is something wrong with Laura. Maybe it is because she is smoking heroin that she can not think clearly.

Laura closed her eyes and sighed as if she was dreaming. I went into the bedroom and got the perfume bottle from her drawer and when I went back into the main room her eyes were open but she looked a bit dizzy. I asked her where she had gotten it from and she said that Eric had given it her and then I knew for sure that Eric is a very dangerous man because I am sure now that it was him who killed Belinda. I couldn’t tell Laura what I thought because Laura likes Eric and does FFF for him which is probably why he gave her the perfume. She said that she liked the smell and that ever since she had been using the perfume, Eric had been crazy for her. Now I think I understand everything. I think Eric killed Belinda and stole her money and her perfume and he gave the perfume to Laura and she used it but she didn’t know that it is magic and that now Eric has fallen in love with her. Laura was smiling and giggling and she lay back on the sofa and I asked her if I could borrow the perfume for a while because I thought it smelled lovely and she giggled and said of course I could because I was her best friend and that it was thanks to me that she was doing this job and she was making so much money. I put the bottle in my bag and went home.

On the way home Vince called me and asked me if I wanted to buy some cocaine and I said yes, I did. I asked him to come around that evening because now I have more than £10,000 in my apartment and I need his help to send it to my bank account in Udon Thani.

After I got home I had five more customers. One of them was black and I was so scared when I saw him on my CCTV. I phoned Natalie and said that he was black and she said that it didn’t matter because he was a customer and I had to see him. I was scared to let him into my apartment because I had so much money there but actually, he was quite nice. His name was Derek and he was from Brixton which is in South London and he spoke just like he was English. He repaired computers and was quite smart and to tell the truth I had quite a good time with him. I don’t know why I was so scared of black men before because Derek was a good man. Jai Dee we say in Thai, which means he has a good heart. Not like Eric and Leif. They are Jam Dam and Jai Lai and even Jai Sat, which are bad words in Thai.

Leif came to collect my money at half past two in the morning. I had £850 for him. He said that next Saturday night there would be a party at the house in St Johns Wood and that all the girls from the agency would be going. He said that Eric wanted me to do a sex show with Candy and Laura, a domination show with Candy and Laura being the dominant ones and me being the slave. Leif said he was looking forward to seeing what the girls were going to do to me and he smiled and it was a very cruel smile. I was a bit scared but I know I have no choice. I have to do whatever they say. That is my life now. He told me to give him oral and he did and then he said he wanted to have sex so I went to the bedroom and lay down. He took off his clothes and before I could do anything he was having sex with me. I begged him to use a condom but he wouldn’t. When he went I rushed to the bathroom and spent ages washing myself, but no matter how hard I washed I didn’t feel clean.

Leif

2007-11-11T14:25:00.000-08:00

On Saturday I had twelve customers. Seven were for half an hour incall, four were for one hour incall, and one was a three hour outcall at the Hilton near Paddington Station. Four of the incall customers wanted anal. Actually now anal is not too bad. It doesn’t hurt if I relax and think about something else and it means I don’t have to look at the customer. I try to do it doggy style now too because that means I don’t see the customer and I can close my eyes and think about something else. I still make noises as if I enjoy it because otherwise they might complain to Eric that I am not giving good service, but really I hate every minute.

The outcall job was okay, actually. He was a businessman from Bristol which is in the West Country. His name was George and he was about fifty-five and he was quite gentle. He couldn’t get very hard so we didn’t make love properly but I gave him a massage and oral and for most of the time we just lay cuddling on his bed. He actually let me go after two hours even though he paid for three and it was about ten o’clock so I decided I would hurry to Thai Square.

I caught the Underground train at Paddington and got a Bakerloo Line train to Charing Cross which is not far from Trafalgar Square which is where the Thai Square bar is. There was an advertisement on the Tube for something called Poppy Project which is a company which helps working girls who have been trafficked. I wrote down the number – 0207 840 7129. The advert said that they could give working girls a place to stay and someone to listen to but I am not sure if they would be able to help me or my friends. And really, I have not been trafficked. I chose to come to London and I chose to be a working girl. The only thing I did not choose was to work for Eric.

Moon and Nat were there drinking with some girls from A1 that I hadn’t met before. They all seemed very pleased to see me and Moon bought me a Bacardi Breezer. The girls were all talking about a Lithuanian woman who had been arrested for running an escort agency and for a moment I thought they might be talking about Natalie, but they weren’t. The woman was arrested in Brent which is in North London and there had been two men from Albania arrested with her. She had twelve girls working for her but Nat said they weren’t Thai, they were from Eastern Europe. Moon said that the police had given the operation a name, it was called Operation Pentameter and it was to protect victims of trafficking. I was going to ask Moon if she knew the names of the policemen who were involved but then you know who came into the bar? It was Cat, with another Thai girl. I could not believe it. When Cat saw me she went out straight away but I ran after her and I caught up with her outside the bar. She said she didn’t want to talk to me but I said that she had to because what had happened to me wasn’t fair. I had worked for the agency for more than four months and I had been a good worker. But I had been working for her and Oliver and now I was working for Eric and that was not fair because I hadn’t chosen to work for Eric.

Cat said it wasn’t her fault. Eric had taken over the agency and there was nothing she could do. I asked her why Oliver had let Eric take over the agency and Cat laughed and said that there was nothing Oliver could do. Eric was mafia and he could kill people. I said I wanted to speak to Oliver and she said I couldn’t because she didn’t know where he was.

Cat said that Oliver had gone with Eric and two other men and she hadn’t seen him since and his mobile was switched off. I asked her what she thought had happened to Oliver and she said she didn’t know. I asked her if she had gone to the police and she said if she went to the police then Eric would kill her, for sure. Eric had killed people in Lithuania, that’s what Oliver had told her. He was a gangster who dealt in guns and drugs and prostitutes and he wasn’t scared of anything or anybody.

I asked her if she thought that Eric had killed Oliver and Cat said she didn’t think that, but she thought that Oliver was so scared that he had run away. I asked her what she was going to do and she said she was going to bring some Thai girls over from Bangkok and have them work in a flat in Chelsea but that she wouldn’t have an internet escort agency again because it was too dangerous. If you were on the internet then anybody could see how many girls you had and know how much money you were making.

Then I asked Cat if Eric was telling the truth about what he could do to our families in Thailand and she said yes, she was sorry but he had friends who were Lithuanian mafia who worked in Pattaya and that was why he wanted our passports and ID cards. He had sent copies to his friends in Pattaya and they already knew everything about where we lived and who our families were. She said that all I could do was to work for Eric. She said that I had no choice. Then my phone rang and it was Natalie saying that I had an incall job in fifteen minutes. Cat ran away when I was talking to Natalie. She got into a cab and drove off and I was so angry but there was nothing I could do. I got a cab and when I got back to my flat the customer was outside waiting for me.

The big man who had forced me to do anal came to get my money at three o’clock in the morning. During the day I had earned £1,840 which meant that I had to give him £920. I think Eric is making a lot of money from us girls, much more than Oliver ever got. There are nine girls working for the agency so if they are all giving him almost £900 a day then every day he is earning about £8,000 every day which means in one year he will earn almost three million pounds. I do not think I will be able to work like this for one year, though. I think I would rather die than do this for a year. The man said that his name was Leif and he wanted me to give him oral sex. I did because I knew that if I didn’t I would have a big problem. I know now that I have to do whatever Eric and Leif and the rest of them want. I have no choice.

On Saturday Natalie sent me my first customer at eleven o’clock in the morning which meant that I only slept for six hours. I felt terrible but I had some cocaine so I took that so that I had some energy. Natalie sent me three more customers before five o’clock but then it was quiet for three hours so I got some sleep then. But I had to do laundry first. I have so many customers now that I don’t have time to give them clean towels any more. If the towels are wet then I put them in the dryer for a bit but if they are not wet I just use them again. Before I used to use a clean towel on the bed for every customer but now I keep the same towel on the bed all day. I don’t shower after every customer now. I don’t have the time and even if I did then it wouldn’t be good for my skin to have ten or twelve showers every day.

You know, before I was an escort girl and I quite liked my job and I was proud that my customers liked me and I gave good service. But now I am a whore and no one cares about me. They just want to use me and that makes me feel bad.

Natalie called me again at eight o’clock and I was busy all night. Nancy called me three times during the night asking me if I would go around to see her but I couldn’t because I was so busy. I didn’t finish working until three o’clock in the morning and then I went to see her. She was crying and saying that she wished she was dead, and I said that I understood how she felt. Nancy said that she was as busy as me and that one day she had had fifteen customers. She said she hurt inside, too, and sometimes when she went to the toilet there was blood.

I asked her about Chris and she said that Chris had phoned her and told her to stay away from the hospital because the police kept coming to see him to find out what had happened. Nancy said that Chris was very scared of Eric and said that Nancy had to do whatever Eric said because otherwise he would hurt Chris again and maybe kill him.

Nancy said that she couldn’t sleep she was so worried and that she was going to get some sleeping pills from a doctor. I said that I always fell asleep really quickly because I was so tired but she said she couldn’t sleep because she was thinking too much. I told her about the advertisement I had seen for the Poppy Project and I gave her the telephone number but she said that she didn’t think the police would be able to stop Eric and I think that she might be right. We both lay on her bed and held each other and cried and eventually we slept. We woke up when her phone rang at ten o’clock in the morning. It was Natalie, telling her to get ready for a customer so I had to leave her and go home.

I wish I was dead

2007-11-09T06:05:00.000-08:00

I wish I was dead. Really. My life now is horrible and I don’t think there is anything I can do to make it better. I have to do whatever Eric says and if I don’t he will hurt me and my family. I want to run but there is nowhere I can run to.

They came to my flat at eleven o’clock in the morning. They were the two men who had come with Eric the first time but yesterday Eric was not with them. The big one, the one that wanted me to give him oral last time, did all the talking while the other one just stared at me and grinned like it made him happy to see me cry.

The big man said that customers had complained that I did not do anal. I said that I never did anal, I would do anything else and I would give good service but I did not do anal. The man said that anal was nothing, I was a whore and whores did whatever their customers wanted them to. I said no, I wasn’t a whore, I was an escort, and escorts could choose what they did.

He shook his head and said that I was not an escort, I was a whore. If a customer wanted my mouth, I had to give him my mouth. If a customer wanted my pussy then I had to give them my pussy. If a customer wanted my bum then I had to give him my bum. I was a whore and I had no choice. I was so unhappy that I could not speak, I just stood there shaking my head.

What happened then is so horrible I do not want to talk about it. I do not want to think about it. The second man said something in his language to the big man and they both laughed and then the big man grabbed me and took me into the bedroom and they both took off my clothes. I tried to scream but the big man used the belt of my robe to tie my mouth and then they threw me on the bed and they both did anal to me. Both of them did it and do you know what, they did not even use a condom. They were so rough and the pain was so bad that I nearly passed out. They were cursing me and saying that if I ever complained about anal then next time five men would come and they would rape me all night. They said I was their whore and I must never ever argue with them again.

When they had finished they left me on the bed and I just lay there crying and then after fifteen minutes Natalie rang and said I had an incall customer. I went to the bathroom and when I washed myself there was blood. Quite a lot of blood, actually.

The first customer was okay. He was a businessman in his forties, I think, and he only wanted oral. But then I was busy all day. I had twelve customers. Three of them wanted anal and I did it. I just lay there and let them do it to me. It hurt a lot because Eric’s men had been so rough but I did not cry, I just lay there and tried to imagine that I was somewhere else and that it was happening to somebody else. I tried to feel like a block of wood because nothing can hurt a block of wood.

After the first customer went Vince phoned me and said he was sorry but his phone battery had died last night and I said I need some cocaine and he brought some for me and I gave him £200. Using cocaine is the only way I can get through the day now. It gives me energy. I wanted to tell Vince about what had happened to my life but I don’t think he can help me so I didn’t. I don’t think anyone can help me now. I feel so alone and sad, sad, sad.

Trapped

2007-11-08T11:20:00.000-08:00

It seems like all I do now is work and sleep, work and sleep, and sometimes I eat. I am so tired, so tired that my life feels like a dream. Sometimes when I am having sex it feels like it is someone else on the bed, not me. If it wasn’t for the cocaine that I buy from Vince I wouldn’t be able to do it. Actually I am making quite a bit of money even though I have to give half to Eric. I am much busier than before. Much, much busier. And I am saving money because I have no time to go shopping and I did not play cards on Sunday night. But that does not mean I am happy because I am not happy. I hate my life now.

Most of my jobs are incall and a lot of them are for thirty minutes. I understand why. It is because Eric wants to make as much money from me as possible. If I do one hour incall then I charge £150. When Oliver was in charge, I would keep £100 and give £50 to Oliver. Now I keep £75 and I give £75 to Eric. But if I see two customers for half an hour each, then I earn £200 and I keep £100 and give £100 to Eric. That means that I earn the same but Eric earns £25 more. But what is not fair is that now I am having to work twice as hard as I worked before. Before I could have sex with one man to earn £100 but now I have to have sex with two men. I am working twice as hard.

Outcalls are still for one hour. It would be impossible to do outcall for just thirty minutes. Outcall means travelling to where the customer is so that will cost money and take time. If I do an hours incall then I charge £210 and now I keep £105 and I give £105 to Eric. But I have to pay for my taxi and not all my outcall customers tip me so if I have to pay for my taxi then I earn less for outcall then incall but Eric gets more. Before when I did an hours outcall I would keep £140 and Oliver would get £70 so now outcall is not such a good deal for me. But I prefer outcall because it means I am not so rushed. I can relax a bit. When I am in my room seeing customers for half an hour then I am not relaxed.

At about five o’clock Natalie phoned me and said that I had to do two hours incall with Sandra at her flat. I didn’t want to do it because I know that Sandra is still not happy with me but I know that I can not argue with Natalie because if I do she will tell Eric and then I will be in trouble.

I got to the flat just before the customer was due because I didn’t want to talk to Sandra but actually she was okay and quite sweet to me. I asked her what she thought about Eric and she said she wasn’t happy. She said her boyfriend was not happy and I told her what had happened to Nancy’s boyfriend Chris. Nancy had phoned me to tell me that she had gone to see Chris in hospital and that he was really hurt. The doctors had asked him what had happened and he told them that he had fallen downstairs. He said that if he told them what had really happened then Eric would kill him and kill Nancy. Sandra said she didn’t think Eric would kill them but I told her that he had said he would cut me with a knife and that he would kill my son. He has our passports and our ID cards and he knows where we live.

Sandra said it would not be a problem to get a new passport because all we had to do was to go to the Thai Embassy in London and tell them who we were. And it would be easy to get a ticket and go back to Thailand. We could say that we had visas in the passports that were stolen so we wouldn’t have a problem leaving the country. I said that maybe Eric did have friends in Thailand and that if he did then he could still hurt us. Sandra said that when we got to Thailand we could change our names and get new ID cards because it is easy to change your name in Thailand. But I am not sure if that would work. I think Eric is a very bad man who is not scared of anybody and I think that if we run away and he finds us then really he will hurt us a lot and maybe kill us. I have never met anyone as evil as Eric.

The customer’s name was Owen and he was English but not from London. He was from a city called Newcastle which is up near Scotland and he had a strange accent that I could hardly understand. I think he had taken Viagra because he had a red face and sniffed a lot and he stayed hard for the whole two hours. Sandra gave him oral and then I gave him oral and then he had sex with Sandra from behind and then I went on top and then he wanted oral from me while he kissed Sandra and then he made love to me doggy-style and then he wanted me to lick him while he had sex with Sandra. He made love for the whole two hours and I was exhausted. After Owen had gone I went home without showering because I wanted to get away from Sandra. I don’t think she has a good heart and I do not think I can trust her. I wanted to talk to Vince but when I called him his phone was off. I left a message saying that I wanted to talk to him and that I needed to buy some more cocaine.

I had five more customers after I got home and the last one left at three o’clock in the morning. Three of them asked for anal and I had to tell them that I do not do anal. When Natalie phoned me I asked her to change what was written on my cards because so many customers want me to do anal and she said I should do it and charge more but I said I didn’t want to do it so she said she would talk to Eric which was nice of her. When I had finished work I was so tired that I did not even shower I just fell asleep on the sofa.

I woke up when there was a banging on the door and it was Eric coming to collect his money. I gave him £750 and he went. He didn’t say anything about anal so maybe Natalie hadn’t spoken to him. I went into the bedroom and fell asleep right away. I had bad dreams all night and in them Belinda was covered in blood and shouting at me that I should run, run, run because I was going to die if I stayed where I was. I want to run, really I do, but I don’t know where I can run to where I will be safe.

My sad life

2007-11-07T05:07:00.000-08:00

What is happening to me is not fair. All I ever wanted to do was to work and make good money to take care of my son and my family. But now I feel like a prisoner because I have to work for Eric. And it is not just Eric, I think. I think now the mafia are running the agency. Mafia from Lithuania. Oliver has gone now and so has Cat and it is always the girl called Natalie who calls and tells us who are customers are. Work is horrible now. Really horrible. When Oliver was the boss I saw a few customers a day and they were usually nice and kind and I had a good time but now I don’t like most of the men who come to see me. A lot come for just half an hour and all they want is oral and sex and they don’t want to talk to me or get to know me. Some of them ask for anal and I say that I don’t do anal and some of them get angry because it says I do A Levels on my card. It’s like before I was an escort and now I am just a prostitute and I feel dirty. I know now that there is nothing I can do to stop what is happening. I know that for sure if I do not do what Eric says he will hurt me and he will hurt my family.

On Monday morning I went to see Nancy. Chris was there and he was very angry. Nancy was crying and said that Eric had told her what he told me. No one had slapped Nancy but they had told her that they knew where her mother lived and that if she tried to run away someone in Thailand would go and kill her mother. They knew Nancy’s mother’s address and everything about her. I believe that they have someone in Thailand who knows all about us now. Nancy said she was scared and I said I was scared too. She said she was working very hard now and seeing more then ten customers ever day and she didn’t want to because she wanted to spend more time with Chris. Chris wanted to go to the police but Nancy said that the British police wouldn’t be able to protect her family in Thailand which I think is true. Chris said the British police could talk to the Thai police but we told Chris that he didn’t understand what life was like in Thailand. If somebody wanted to hurt our families they could. Chris said that he would talk to Eric and see if he could get him to let Nancy go. He said he would tell the newspapers about what was happening and that Eric wouldn’t want the newspapers to know so maybe he would agree to Nancy leaving the agency. I didn’t think Eric would listen to anyone but I didn’t say anything to Chris.

Then my phone rang and it was Natalie telling me I had a customer so I had to go home. On Monday night Eric came to see me and he looked at my book and then took half the money I had earned. I had seen six customers who came for half an hour each so that was £600 and I had four customers for one hour which was another £600 so I had earned £1,200 and so Eric took £600. That means I had £600 for myself which sounds like a lot but I had to have sex with ten men for that which means I was getting only £60 each time which is not good. I was tired and I was sore and all I wanted to do was to sleep. I told Eric I wanted to stop work and he said I couldn’t. I said that wasn’t fair and he said he didn’t care what was fair. He took a flicknife out of his pocket and showed it to me and he said he would cut my face if I tried to stop working. I asked him if I could pay him money to stop working and he laughed. He said a good whore could earn him £200,000 in a year so if I wanted to stop working I had to pay him £200,000 which is a fortune. Eric said once I had earned £200,000 for him he would let me go but I don’t believe him. I knew there was no point in saying anything to him so I just stayed quiet. He laughed and then he took a photograph out of his pocket and showed it to me and it was Daeng with my mother in front of my house and I knew then that I was trapped and there is nothing I can do to save myself. I belong to Eric now like a cow belongs to a farmer. I don’t know why this has happened to me because I am a good person and I never do anything to hurt anybody.

I went to sleep after Eric went but I was woken up by Nancy who was crying so much that I couldn’t understand what was wrong so I had to go around to her flat to talk to her. She was crying and crying and wouldn’t stop but eventually she told me what had happened. Chris had been in the flat when Eric went to get his money and Chris said that he didn’t want Nancy to work any more. Eric had smiled and nodded and said that he understood. Eric said that he would let Nancy leave the agency and then he held out his hand to shake and Chris took his hand and then Eric headbutted him. He broke Chris’s nose and then he kicked him between the legs and Chris fell down. Then Eric picked up a lamp and smashed that onto Chris’s head and then he started stamping on his legs so hard that he broke the bones and then he kicked him in the stomach many times. Nancy tried to help but Eric punched her and she collapsed. Then Eric kept kicking Chris until he was unconscious. Then Nancy said that Eric phoned his friends and they came and took Chris away. Now Nancy doesn’t know if Chris is alive or dead. And Eric told her that if she ever told anybody what had happened he would do the same to her and then he would do the same to her mother. Nancy hugged me and said she was so scared and I said that I was scared too. It is like Eric is not scared of anything or anybody and can do whatever he likes to other people. Nancy said she wanted to kill herself and I understood how she felt but I said no, she mustn’t do that. She said that being dead would be better than the way she was living now and I think she might be right. We lay together on her bed and cried together and that’s what we did all night.

I was busy on Tuesday, too. It was like I had a constant stream of customers one after the other. Sometimes I didn’t even have time to wash or shower. Every one of the customers I saw was a new customer and I asked some of them where they had heard about me and they all said they had seen my picture in a phone box. And you know, they had seen my pictures all over London not just near my flat. Not one of the customers had come because they had seen the agency website. Now I know what I am. I am not an escort any more. I am a prostitute. That is not what I wanted but now it is my life. I am so sad. Sad, sad, sad.

I want to phone Daeng and hear his voice but I can not because I know I will just start crying and I do not want to upset him.

At about six o’clock my phone rang and it was Robert. He asked me if I was okay and I lied and said that I was. He said that he had tried to book me three times but that each time he had been told that I was busy. I said I was busy but I asked him if he would keep trying and he said that he would. I said that I missed him which was true.

At about midnight I phoned Laura to see if she was okay and you know, she said she was happy with the way she was working. She said she was really busy and earning very good money and that really it was fair that she gave half to Eric because they were getting her more money than Oliver did. I asked her if Eric had threatened her and she said he had but that there was no need for him to threaten her because she was happy. And she said that Eric was quite cute and that she had had sex with him for free when he went to her flat. I couldn’t believe what she was saying. She did FFF with the man who is threatening to kill my son. I think there is something wrong with Laura. I think she is a bit crazy.

Eric came to get my money at two o’clock in the morning. He checked my book and I gave him £750 and he asked me if everything was okay and I smiled and said it was. After he went I cried and cried. Then I got a text from Robert saying that he missed me and that made me smile a bit. I sent him a text back saying that I missed him. Maybe Robert can help me. He is rich and rich people have power. That is true in Thailand and it is true in England, too. But I am a bit scared that if I ask Robert for help and Eric finds out then Eric might do something bad to him, and to me. I don’t think Eric is scared of anybody. And even if Robert helps me, how will I be able to protect my family?

My nightmare

2007-11-05T14:15:00.001-08:00

My life feels like a nightmare but I know it is not a nightmare, it is real and I won’t wake up and find that it’s all a dream. I don’t know how this has happened but I have a big problem now and I think it is a problem without a solution. I have spent all day crying. Except when I have a customer, then I have to pretend to be happy but inside I am sad, sad, sad. And I am scared, more scared than I have ever been in my life.

I had spoken to Laura and Nancy and Candy and Nancy spoke to Sandra and Vicky and Rachel and Candy told Alice what Oliver was doing and we all agreed that on Sunday night we would go to the Sloane Square flat and talk to Oliver and tell him that we didn’t want our pictures in phone boxes.

Then on Sunday morning Cat phoned me and said that I wasn’t to go to the Sloane Square flat and that someone would come around to collect the money. I asked why and she sounded a bit angry and said that was what was going to happen and I shouldn’t argue. I asked who would be coming to my flat and she said Eric, the man we had seen at the flat last week. She said Eric would be coming to the flat at seven o’clock and that he would explain things to me and that I was to give my money to him. I said that I wanted to speak to Oliver and she said that Oliver wasn’t there. And she said I had an hours incall at mid-day so I should get ready. The incall customer was called Karl and he was from South Africa and he was quite funny but I didn’t enjoy myself because I was so worried about what was happening. After he left I phoned Oliver to say that he had gone but Cat answered the phone. I asked her if I could speak to Oliver and she said that he wasn’t there and she sounded upset. I asked her what was wrong but she wouldn’t say.

She ended the call and right away Nancy phoned me to ask her why we weren’t going to the Sloane Square flat and I said I didn’t know and she said she was a bit scared and I said that I was too. She said that Cat had said that Eric would be coming to see her about seven-thirty which means that he was coming to see me first. Nancy said she had spoken to Sandra and Eric was going to her flat at six o’clock. So what was happening was that Eric was going around to all the flats to collect the money from the girls. Nancy said she wanted to go to the Sloane Square flat because it was fun and we could all eat and talk and play cards and I said I agreed, it was good that all the girls get together. I said I didn’t know why Oliver has changed his plan. Before it was a good plan and I didn’t like Eric and I didn’t like being told to stay at home like I was a child.

Then I got a call from Cat saying that I had a half hour incall in ten minutes so I had to get ready. The customer was horrible. He smelled of alcohol and cigarettes and had bad skin and he said he didn’t want to take a shower because he didn’t have time. He was rough and he bit me on my shoulder and I hated having sex with him.

In the afternoon Simon called me to see if I was okay and I wanted to tell him what had happened but I couldn’t. I just said that I was a bit tired. He said he would book me for three hours and he would come around to the flat and I would just go to sleep and he would watch television which was so sweet of him. I said okay but that I would probably be busy at about seven o’clock. Simon said no problem and that he would call the agency.

I phoned Oliver’s number again and Cat answered and I could tell that she was crying and she said that I shouldn’t call her and that Eric would explain everything and then someone took the phone off her and it was a man and he wanted to know who I was and I just ended the call. I was shaking and angry and upset and I wished I had someone to talk to but I didn’t.

At two o’clock my phone rang and it was Oliver’s number but it wasn’t Oliver and it wasn’t Cat, it was a woman who spoke with what sounded like a Russian accent but I think might have been Lithuanian because Eric and Oliver are from Lithuania. She said that I had a customer for two-thirty and that his name was Gordon and that he wanted me to wear school uniform. I asked her who she was and she said that her name was Natalie and I asked her where Cat was and she said that Cat had gone home and then I asked her where Oliver was and she said that Oliver didn’t work for the agency any more and then I was a bit scared because the agency was Oliver’s. He set it up, it was his agency, and he ran it. I don’t think he would just go away and give it to someone else. Then Natalie said she was too busy to talk to me and she ended the call.

I phoned Nancy and she said that she had spoken to Natalie too and that she agreed that something was wrong. We couldn’t talk for long because she had a customer and I was really busy all afternoon and I was so tired that I could hardly keep my eyes open. I phoned Vince and asked him to bring me some cocaine and he did and I paid him £200. He asked me if I was okay and I said I was even though I wasn’t. I wanted to see what Eric had to say before I told anyone else.

I had a customer come at six for an hour. It was Richard, the man who wears his tracksuit and pretends to be out running so that his wife won’t know what he is doing. Richard could tell that I wasn’t happy but I pretended to smile. I had taken some of Vince’s cocaine so I had plenty of energy but the cocaine didn’t make me happy.

About five minutes after Richard had there was a knock at my door. I didn’t open it because I only open the door if I have seen who it is on the CCTV at the entrance to the building and then I buzz them in. I didn’t know who was at my door but then he knocked again, really hard, and shouted that it was Eric and that I should open the door. I did. He was wearing a big black coat and behind him were two men that I hadn’t seen before who were also wearing big black coats. I was so scared that my legs started to shake. Eric pushed past me and went into my flat and I went after him.

He asked me where my book was and I got it from the kitchen. He sat down on the sofa and put his feet on the coffee table and looked through the book. The two men with him kept staring at me and one of them said something and I didn’t understand because he spoke in Russian or Lithuanian but I am sure that he was talking about my breasts because that’s what they were looking at. I went into the bedroom and got my bathrobe and put it on.

Eric told me to get my money and I did. It was in an envelope and he counted it. I had earned £4,800 during the week so I had to give Oliver £1,600. When he had finished counting it, Eric said that the agency was now charging fifty per cent commission and that I had to give him £2,400 which meant that I had to give him £800 more. I said that Oliver only took one third and he said that Oliver wasn’t running the agency any more. He said that the agency was now getting me more work so that I should pay them more. I said that wasn’t fair. And I said that it wasn’t fair that he was putting my photographs in phone boxes. Eric said something to the men and one of them stepped forward and hit me. Really, I am serious, he slapped my face. No one has ever hit me before, not even my mother or father. My teachers at school in Udon Thani sometimes threatened to smack me if I was naughty but they never did. But this man slapped my face so hard that I started crying.

I ran into the bedroom and tried to close the door but Eric pushed it open. I ran around the bed and tried to hide but of course there was nowhere to hide. Eric pointed his finger at me and said that things had changed and that now it was his agency. He said he would pay me fifty per cent and that if I ever argued with him again he would really hurt me.

I was really crying and I said I wanted to go home and I meant Thailand. He said that I couldn’t go home because he had my passport. And he said that if I ran away or complained to anyone, he would send people to hurt me in Thailand. He said they would slash my face with a razor so that no man would ever want to look at me again. And he said he knew about my son and he would hurt my son and my mother and my father. He said he knew where I lived in Thailand because he had my ID card and no matter where I went he would be able to find me. He said he would cut me and burn down my house and throw my son into the flames. Really, he said that.

I was crying so hard and my whole body was shaking. He asked me if I understood and I said that I did. He said that if I was a good girl I would still make a lot of money. I asked him when I could go home and he said when I had earned enough money for him and I asked when that would be and he said that he would tell me. Then he told me to get his money and I went into the sitting room and got him £800 from under the carpet.

One of the other men said something and Eric laughed. He said that his friend wanted a blow job and that I should give him one. I was so scared that I just did what Eric said. I knelt down in front of the man and he opened his trousers and I gave him oral sex until he came in my mouth. I felt sick. After he came he pushed me back and I fell on the floor and curled up into a ball and cried.

Eric leant over me and said that in future someone would come around every day to collect the money for the agency. Every day I had to give him half of what I earned. He asked me if I understood and I said yes, I did. He patted me on the head and said that I was a good girl and then they all went. They were laughing and I hated them so much that if I had had a gun I would have killed them.

I lay on the floor for a long time crying and then I phoned Nancy but her phone was switched off and I called Laura but her phone kept ringing and she didn’t answer.

Then Natalie phoned and said that I had a customer for half an hour incall and that he would be around in five minutes. I said that I was sick and couldn’t work. She said that I had to work. She said that if I didn’t work Eric would send someone around to the flat to make sure that I did work. She sounded nasty and I knew what she meant. She meant that if I did not work they would hurt me. They would hurt me a lot. So I took some cocaine and then I showered and got ready for the customer.

I kept hoping that Natalie would phone to say that Simon had booked me so that least I could spend time with a friend but every time she phoned it was to say that I had another customer. In the evening I had seven customers, three for one hour and four for thirty minutes. Before Sunday was always a quiet day and none of us worked on Sunday evening because we went to the Sloane Square flat. But now Sunday is like every other day and it is busy. So busy that if I did not have the cocaine to help me I think I would have collapsed.

I hate this job now. I hate it more than anything. But I don’t know what I can do to save myself.

Phone boxes

2007-11-04T08:23:00.000-08:00

I was very busy on Friday and Saturday, and now I know why and I am so angry but I don’t know what I can do about it. I had five incalls during the day on Friday and three of them were just for half an hour. Then Simon booked me for three hours from eight o’clock until eleven and he bought me some Chinese food and three DVDs and he let me choose which one I wanted to watch. I chose Déjà Vu which has Denzel Washington in it. It was a movie about seeing into the future and was a bit like the one called Next which I saw, but Deja Vu was much better. I wish I could see into my future. I was so tired that I fell asleep while I was watching the movie. When I woke up Simon said that he didn’t mind and I felt a bit sad for him because he had paid a lot of money and all I had done was eat his food and sleep. I told him that I was so busy and it was making me tired and he said not to worry. Actually I should have phoned Vince and bought some cocaine because when I take cocaine I have lots of energy.

Simon left at eleven o’clock and I got changed and got a black taxi to take me to Trafalgar Square and I went down to Thai Square. I was a bit scared going on my own and I was really worried that I would see Cat but she wasn’t there. I bought a Bacardi Breezer and then walked around and I saw Fon and Moon sitting with some other girls. They were happy to see me and they introduced me to three other girls who all work for the A1 agency. Their names were Anne, Nat and Tum. I sat down with them and Tum said she had seen my picture and I thought she meant on the agency’s website but she didn’t. She had seen my picture in a telephone box. I was so shocked and I asked her what she meant. She said that some working girls advertise with cards in phone boxes. The cards have a picture and a phone number and say what the girl will do. Tum said that my card said I would do ‘A levels’ which is anal and ‘O levels’ which is oral. I said that was not true and that I never did anal but Tum said she was sure it was me and she described the stockings I was wearing in the picture and I am sure it is one of the photographs from Oliver’s website.

Moon said that the girls who advertised in phone boxes weren’t as high-class as agency girls. Their customers were cheap and walked around the streets looking for sex and no one knew who they were. Fon said that was true and that a lot of men who got girls from phone boxes had diseases. Nat said that she knew a girl who worked in a flat near Oxford Circus and she advertised in phone boxes and she sometimes saw more than twenty customers a day. Customers could pay just £30 for oral and £50 for sex if they were really quick. Moon said yes, you could make good money that way, but you were sure to get sick because it is not good to make love to so many men.

I just sat there shocked because now I know what Oliver is doing. He is advertising me in phone boxes. That is not fair. When I joined the agency he told me that he knew who his customers were and that his customers were all high-class rich men who wanted to spend time with a pretty young girl. But now he is sending me low-class customers who have been walking around the street looking for sex.

I didn’t tell the A1 girls that because I was shy. I said that maybe someone had stolen my photograph and they said yes, sometimes people did that. If a girl wasn’t pretty then she wouldn’t get any customers but if she used a photograph of a pretty girl then the customer would come and hopefully not change his mind when he saw it was a different girl. Actually some of the agencies do the same thing but it is not a good idea because if a customer is paying £150 or more for a girl then he should get what he is paying for.

I tried to smile but inside I was so upset that I felt like crying. I asked them if they knew what had happened to Bee and Moon said that she had been robbed and killed. The man who had killed her had taken all her money and her jewellery and the police didn’t know who it was but thought it was maybe the man who had been stealing from working girls in London. I said that Bee didn’t have CCTV at her flat and everybody said that was a bad idea. Then my phone rang and it was Oliver. I couldn’t answer because he would hear the noise of the nightclub so I went outside and called him back and I had another incall booking so I had to go back to my flat. I had three more bookings on Friday and I was so tired that I fell asleep on the sofa.

On Saturday I went to Oxford Circus and walked around looking in phone boxes. There were a lot of cards advertising all sorts of working girls. There were Asian girls and black girls and Japanese girls and farang girls too. I saw my photograph on a lot of phone boxes. And I saw Nancy and Sandra and Candy and Alice as well. My photograph had a black strip across my eyes but you could tell it was me. And it did say that I did A levels which is not true. Nancy’s card said ‘Does All Services’ and Candy’s card had a picture of her in her domination outfit. The number on the cards wasn’t the number that Oliver uses on the website. I took some of the cards and then I went to see Nancy. I showed her the card with her photograph on and she was so angry. Chris was there and he was angry to and said that we should stop working for Oliver because he was just a pimp.

Nancy said that we should talk to the other girls and that we could all talk to Oliver on Sunday night and I thought that was a good idea. I gave her the card with Sandra’s photograph on it and said she should tell Sandra because I think Sandra is still angry with me and I went to see Candy. Candy was angry and she said she would go and tell Alice and then my phone rang and it was Oliver to say that I had an incall booking. I wanted to tell Oliver that I knew that he had been lying to us but I didn’t because it would be better if all the girls were there at the same time.

I was very, very busy on Saturday. I had nine customers and they all wanted sex. By five o’clock I was so tired that I could hardly keep my eyes open so I phoned Vince and bought some cocaine off him. I wanted to tell Vince what had happened but I didn’t have time because my next customer was due. I am so angry at Oliver but we can get it sorted out on Sunday night. Then we can all tell him that he is not being fair.

Half hours

2007-11-02T15:10:00.001-07:00

I was very busy again yesterday. I don’t know why but it is good because I am earning a lot of money. I am so busy that I have had no time to do laundry so I put twelve towels in a black rubbish bag and took them to a laundry. The woman who took them was from Poland, I think, and she frowned when she saw so many towels. I just smiled and didn’t say anything.

I had a lot of bills to pay, too. I had my electricity bill which is quite high because of all the hot water I use and my council tax bill which I have to pay every month. Also I had to buy a top up for my T-mobile phone. I probably spend £20 a day on my phone because I call my friends a lot and I call Thailand a lot. I use the phonecards but I still have to call a London number to get access to the phonecard and that costs 20p a minute. Yesterday I spent an hour talking to Daeng which means it cost me £12 plus the phonecard. I am not complaining because I want to talk to my son but London is expensive. Just living is expensive. Say you want a bottle of water. In Thailand you can go to a minimart or a 7-11 and bottle of water will cost twelve baht which is less than 20p. But in London a bottle of water costs £1. A Kentucky Fried Chicken meal in Thailand costs about £4 and they will deliver to your house. In London it will cost twice that and no way will they deliver. And you know, if you eat KFC in Thailand they give you a metal knife and fork and real plate. Some things are much better in Thailand. But not the money that people earn. In London people get a minimum wage which I thinks is about £6 an hour. That is about 400 baht. But in Thailand people working in the fast food industry earn less than 300 baht a day. Can you believe that?

While I was in the post office paying my council tax, Oliver phoned me to tell me that I had a customer at eleven o’clock for one hours incall. I hurried back and got ready. The customer was called Ray and he was very nice. He was about fifty I think and had long hair and he could speak some Thai. He said that he liked Thailand and Thai people so I was happy to tell him that I was Thai. I gave him my phone number and said that I would like to see him again, which is true.

After Ray left, Oliver phoned me and said that I had two bookings, one after the other, and then when the second one had gone he called me again and said that I had another booking, this one for half an hour’s incall. I had never done half an hour incall before but he said it was okay and that I could charge £100 and that his share would be £35. Actually I was not happy with half an hour but I did not want to argue with him. The customer was not very nice and he smelled bad but he said that he didn’t want to shower because he didn’t want to waste time so I had to make love to him and it was really bad.

I don’t understand why Oliver gave me a half hour booking. The website says one hour is the minimum unless something has changed. I phoned Nancy and she said that Oliver had given her two half-hour bookings and she wasn’t happy either because seeing a customer for half hour is actually hard work. With an hour you can relax but with half an hour you are just trying to make the customer come. She said that we should speak to Oliver on Sunday night and I said that was a good idea.

I slept for a little bit in the evening but then Oliver phoned me and I had an hours incall followed by half an hours incall followed by another hour.

Then Candy phoned me and asked if I was busy and I said yes, I was almost too busy and she said that all the girls were. Maybe it is because the weather is cold. In one way it is good because we are earning a lot of money but in another way it is not so good because I do not have the time to even shower properly. And I am so tired that when the last customer goes all I can do is sleep.

Simon called me and said that he had tried to book me but that Oliver had said that I was busy and I said yes, I was very busy. Actually, I would rather do three hours incall with Simon than see three separate customers. With Simon I get to watch a movie and eat and cuddle and just have sex once. But with three customers I have to have sex with three men. I told Simon that next time he should book me early and he said that he would.

The last customer left at three o’clock in the morning. All my towels were wet and I had run out of toilet rolls and shampoo. I phoned Daeng and told him how much I missed him and spoke to him for an hour but then I had to stop talking because I missed him so much that I felt my eyes fill with tears. I fell asleep wearing my suspenders and stockings because I was so tired.

So many customers

2007-11-01T06:27:00.000-07:00

I wanted to go to school yesterday but I woke up too late and my head hurt like I had a hangover even though I hadn’t been drinking. I didn’t know that cocaine could give you a hangover! Actually I didn’t wake up until one o’clock in the afternoon and that was because Oliver was ringing to tell me that I had an incall booking for two’clock. I didn’t feel like working because I was so tired and I had a headache and I wanted some cocaine to give me some energy but I didn’t have any so I went to Starbucks instead and had a coffee and a chocolate chip muffin. Actually I think coffee and a chocolate muffin can give you as much energy as cocaine sometimes.

The customer was called Wolf and he was from Germany. I asked him if Wolf was his name or his nickname and he said that his name was really Wolfgang but everyone called him Wolf. I laughed and said that he was the first Wolf who had ever fucked me and he laughed. He was very good at sex and after half an hour he said he wanted to book me for an extra hour and I called Oliver and he said it was okay but that I had another incall booking for four o’clock. Wolf made love to me four times and I was a bit sore and I only had time for a quick shower before the next customer rang the bell. He said his name was Adam. He was wearing a suit and he kept talking to people about apartments so I think he was an estate agent. He didn’t smell very fresh so I had a bubble bath with him and made sure I used lots of shower gel. He kept asking me if I had a boyfriend and I didn’t want to say but eventually I told him I had a black boyfriend and he had a huge cock and that made him go quiet.

As soon as Adam went I phoned Oliver and Oliver said that Robert had booked me for four hours starting at nine o’clock and that made me really happy because I enjoy being with Robert and it is easy money.

I fell asleep on the sofa while I was watching a DVD but then Oliver rang me to say I had another booking. Before I put on my make up I went out to get the free newspapers and I read them but there was nothing in them about Bee being killed. I phoned her number again but there was still no answer. I am not sure what to do. I think maybe the best thing is to go to Thai Square on Friday night and talk to the girls from A1 to see if they know what happened. There is something else I can do, of course. I could use the glass and see if Bee would talk to me but actually I think that would be a bit scary. And I think now is not a good time to talk to ghosts because in England it is Halloween.

The incall booking was an old man in a suit with a briefcase who didn’t say anything to me. When he opened the door he handed me my money and went into the bathroom and showered and then he came out and lay first down on the bed when while I gave him a massage and then he turned over and I gave him oral and then I got on top of him and then he came and then he went into the bathroom and showered again and then he dressed and left. He said not one word. And he didn’t even smile at me. You know, I think it would be better for him if he saved his money and took care of himself.

After he had gone I lay down on the sofa again to get some sleep and the phone rang and it was Nancy. She was asking how busy I was and I told her very busy and she said that she was very busy, too. In fact she said that all the girls were busy. She didn’t know why. Maybe it was because there was no sport on the television and it was a cold day, I said. But she was right. It was a very busy day. It wasn’t the evening yet but I had been working for four hours and I already had four hours booked with Robert. Eight hours in one day is a lot, though at least I don’t have to have sex with Robert. Actually, time with Robert is quite relaxing, though sometimes it does tickle when he licks my feet.

I had just fallen asleep when the phone rang again. It was Oliver. I had another incall booking, this time for an hour and a half, and the customer wanted me to wear my nurse’s uniform.

Before I went to see Robert I phoned Vince and asked him if I could have some more cocaine. I was so tired that I was sure I would fall asleep and I didn’t want Robert to think that I was bored with him. Vince said he would bring some around and he did and then he asked me for £200. I was a bit surprised because I thought he would give it to me but of course it is his business so I paid him. If he did give me free cocaine it would be like a working girl doing FFF, I suppose.

When I went to see Robert I paid him £1,000 of the money that I owe him and he gave it back to me straight away and said that was my fee for the evening and a tip. He asked me if I was okay because I looked tired and I said I was fine. The he took me into the kitchen and gave me a peanut butter sandwich and a chocolate milkshake and then we went into the bathroom and he gave me a bath and then he carried me into the bedroom and licked my feet and played with himself. I wish all my customers were as good to me as Robert.

I got home at half past one and then Oliver rang me to say that I had another one hour incall. I was so, so, tired and the customer was a bit rough and had been drinking a lot but I just closed my eyes and thought about all the money I was making.

Cocaine

2007-10-31T06:01:00.001-07:00

I phoned Vince on Monday and asked him if he would come to my flat because I wanted to talk to him about my money. I was busy during the evening and so was he so he didn’t come until two o’clock in he morning and we were both very tired. I said that I wanted to send £10,000 back to my bank account in Udon Thani and he said he would help me but that it wasn’t a good idea to send so much at the same time. He said the banks got suspicious if someone sent £10,000 and they would tell the tax people or the police. It was better to send less than £5,000. It wasn’t a problem but he would send two lots of money just to be on the safe side and that was okay. You know, Vince was the first man I have asked to my room who was not a customer. But now I don’t really think that Vince is a customer, he is a friend. I got ten envelopes from under the carpet behind the sofa and gave them to him.

Vince took out some cocaine and asked me if I wanted some and I said okay because I was so tired and thought I might fall asleep. He made four lines and rolled up one of his fifty pound notes and we sniffed two each and then I didn’t feel so tired. He kissed me and it wasn’t like kissing a customer, I had real feeling, and we went to the bedroom and we made love. Actually we made love several times and then I went to sleep in his arms. He had to leave early in the morning because he said he had something to do. He left some cocaine for me and said it might help me work or I could sell it to a customer. It was funny because when he left I realised that I had done FFF which I always said that I would never do. Though I suppose actually I did have sex for cocaine so really I did FFC.

Yesterday a customer booked me for two hours with Laura and I went to her apartment. When I first met Laura I thought she was a quiet innocent young girl but now she is so crazy. She was drinking Thai whiskey and as soon as the customer cane she was kissing him on the lips and rubbing his groin before he had even paid his money. That is not professional because sometimes customers come with not enough money and sometimes with no money at all. She knelt down and gave him oral and I asked him for the £300 and it was funny because he took out his wallet and paid me while Laura was giving him oral.

Then we went into the bedroom and before I could do anything she had put a condom on him and was having sex with him. He came really quickly and I realised that actually she is not that crazy. The customer had been in the apartment for just ten minutes and already he had come. Then we gave him a massage for an hour and a half and then I gave him oral and I had sex with him while Laura kissed him. It was only after he had gone that we realised we didn’t even know his name.

I showered in Laura’s bathroom. My itch has stopped and I have no discharge which is good and it means the medicine worked. I am so happy that I didn’t have anything serious. The doctor said that NSU in men is quite common and it can be caused by chlamydia which they give to girls and that a lot of girls have chlamydia without even knowing they have it.

As I was walking back to my apartment Oliver phoned me to tell me that I had an hours incall at the Carlton Tower Hotel and that the customer wanted to see me straight away. I caught a taxi. The driver kept looking at me in the mirror and he asked me where I was from and I said Malaysia because I didn’t want him to know that I was from Thailand. He said that I looked like I was Thai but I said no I wasn’t. He said he had once had a Thai wife but that she had stolen all his money. He said he had met her in Pattaya and he had built a house for her in Korat and that she had said that she was pregnant but it was all a lie and that actually she already had a Thai husband. He started saying horrible things about Thai girls, that they were all liars and that all they cared about is money, and I was so angry but I didn’t say anything. Actually I thought it was his own fault. He was fat and bald and ugly and he said that his wife was young and pretty. Why would he think that a young pretty girl would love him? Of course all she wanted was his money. What else did he have to offer? Nothing. I think it serves him right. We Thais have an expression – Som Naam Naa. It means serves you right. It was his own fault. I didn’t tip him when I got out of the taxi.

The customer’s name was Richard and he was English and quite nice but he kept wanting to do anal. I said that I didn’t do anal and he said that when he had booked me he had been told that I did. I said that was wrong and that if he wanted I would give him his money back and he could get another girl but he said no, he wanted me because I was so pretty so we had sex and I pretended to come and that made him happy.

As soon as I got home Oliver phoned me and said that I had a ninety minutes incall and that his name was Luke. Actually I had seen Luke before. He liked to make love many times and I was tired already. After he had sex with me the second time I went into the bathroom and took some of Vince’s cocaine to give me energy and then I had sex with Luke again. In ninety minutes he came three times and he wasn’t taking Viagra, I am sure. Before I did this job I would never think about taking cocaine but now I understand that it can make the job a bit easier. Customers don’t like it when a girl is tired or had no energy.

I had four more customers during the evening, all incall. By the time I had went to sleep I had used all the cocaine that Vince had left me and my heart was beating really fast but I am sure that all my customers were really happy because I had £250 in tips!

Eric

2007-10-29T13:57:00.003-07:00

Yesterday when we went to the Sloane Square flat there was another man there. It was the first time that I had ever seen another man at the flat. Oliver said that his name was Eric and that he was a friend and I remember seeing him at the party at the house in St Johns Wood. Eric is about thirty I think and he has short spiky hair and bad skin like he had lots of spots when he was a kid. He didn’t smile and he had very hard eyes like they were made of brown ice. He sat on the sofa and drank beer from the bottle and all the time he was watching, watching, watching.

Sandra was still angry at me but she didn’t say anything. But I could tell. I went with Nancy and I had to pay for the taxi, which I always do when I am with her. I think she spends all her money on her kik. I asked her if she had used the strap on with Chris and she said not yet. I hope when it does it hurts him like hell. You know, he still sends me text messages saying that he wants to see me, which is not fair to Nancy.

This week I had £1,600 for Oliver. Alice was the best earning girl with £1,800 though Rachel had almost as much. She had £1,700. Laura had the same as me. Nancy had just £1,150 because she had been lazy and Vicky only had £400 because of the sores on her lip. Candy had a bad week, too, because her period came so she had just £850 for Oliver. Wanda had £1,400 and so did Sandra.

I saw Eric watching the money very carefully and I saw Cat looking at him all the time like she was worried what he might say. After we had all given Oliver our money, Cat brought out some Thai food that she had cooked – Pad Thai and Tom Yam Gung which is spicy prawn soup, and Som Tam, which is very very spicy and which all Thai people love to eat. Cat asked Eric if he wanted so eat and he just shook his head like he was angry.

Eric stayed on the sofa while we sat at the table and ate the food, which was delicious. Then we played cards. Oliver showed Eric how to play and then he started to relax a bit and even laughed when he won. Actually he was quite lucky and won a lot of money, more than £500. Oliver won, too. I lost about £700 and Sandra lost even more. While we played Alice asked Eric where he was from and he said Russia, the same as Oliver, but I know that is not true. Oliver is from Lithuanian and I think Eric is from Lithuania too.

Laura was drinking a lot and being a bit silly. She kept touching Eric and blowing him kisses and actually he seemed to like it.

Rachel asked Cat when we could be getting our passports back and something very strange happened. Right away Cat looked at Eric, as if Eric was the boss now. It was only for a second or two but I realised that something had changed and that Cat and Oliver were no longer in charge and actually I was a bit scared, more scared then when Belinda’s ghost had come to talk to us. I think something bad is going to happen. Something really bad.

Then Cat smiled and said soon. We would get our passports back soon and we would all have one year visas that would allow us to work. Everyone clapped and cheered except me. I just smiled even though I didn’t feel like smiling.

Bee

2007-10-28T14:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to Chinatown with Candy, Sandra and Nancy to eat dim sum. We know a really good restaurant for dim sum but you have to get there early because it is very popular with Chinese people. We asked Vicky to come but she said that the sores on her lip were really ugly so she wanted to stay in. We ate lots of dim sum and we had sliced roast duck which I love and bak choy in garlic sauce which I could eat for ever and a day. Sandra ordered chicken feet and ate them all herself. We drank Chinese tea and talked about how busy we were and how good it was to be making so much money. I thought that Sandra and Nancy might offer to pay back some of the money they owe me but they didn’t. When the bill came we split it four ways and actually I think that if it was just me, Sandra and Nancy, then they would have let me pay.

After dim sum Candy took us to a shop near Dean Street run by Chinese people which sells phone cards really cheaply. They were even cheaper than the shop I go to in Wardour Street. They were selling £20 cards for just £10 and if you paid for three then they gave you a £5 card for free. I bought six cards and got two free. Each £20 card is good for about 1,500 minutes which sounds like a lot but really it goes very quickly when you phone your family every day.

Then my phone rang and it was Laura. She said that she was in Chinatown with Angela and Rachel and she wanted to know what I was doing. I said that I had just eaten and now I was going shopping and Laura said why didn’t we meet at a shop she knows in Oxford Street called Harmony. I asked Sandra, Nancy and Candy and they said sure, so we went there and do you know what, it was a sex shop! Downstairs they sold all sorts of sex toys like dildos and strap ones and things that men can use to make themselves come. There were lots of videos, videos with men and women, women and women, and men with men. There were lots of clothes, too, really sexy clothes, and Candy said that a lot of the dresses would be really good for domination. Nancy bought a big strap-on dildo and said that she was going to use it on Chris and I smiled and I thought good, that serves him right. I found one that was even bigger and I said that she should buy it and she did. Candy bought a dress made of rubber and she helped me chose some leather bikinis that I will wear next time I do domination. They sold whips and paddles and I bought some of them and some oils that go warm on their own when you massage with them. I bought some sexy DVDs because sometimes customers just want to sit on the sofa and watch sexy movies while I give them a blow job, which is easy money, really.

I spent more than £200 and everyone else bought a lot, too. I think we were the best customers that the shop has ever had. Then we walked down to New Bond Street which had got really good fashion shops and between us I think we spent more than £4,000. I bought a lovely Gucci bag and pair of Prada shoes.

At about two o’clock Angela’s phone rang and it was Oliver saying that she had a booking and that the customer wanted to see her and Rachel together. Angela didn’t tell Oliver that Rachel was with her and a minute later Rachel’s phone rang and of course it was Oliver. They both went off to Rachel’s flat.

Candy said that we could all go back to her flat and watch some Thai soap operas that Candy has. Her sister in Bangkok buys them on DVDs from a place called Pantip Plaza and sends them to Candy. Everyone said yes so we all got into a taxi. One of the really good things about London are the black taxis. The drivers are really professional and they know every road in London.

In the taxi to Candy’s flat Wanda told her about talking to Julie using the glass and the letters and Candy and Laura said that she wanted to try it. I didn’t really want to but Sandra and Nancy said it was fun and so we did it. Sandra cut up pieces of paper and Nancy wrote down the letters and ‘YES’ and ‘NO’ and ‘DON’T KNOW’. The we put the pieces of paper in a big circle on Candy’s table and the ‘YES’ and ‘NO’ and ‘DON’T KNOW’ in them middle. Then we sat around the table and put on our fingers on the glass. Candy asked what happened next and Wanda said that we just waited for a spirit.

Actually nothing happened for about five minutes and I was getting bored and I wanted to watch some of the DVDS. But just as I was going to take my finger off the glass it started to move. At first it just moved from side to side a bit but then it started to move in small circles. Sandra asked if there was anybody there and the glass moved really quickly over to ‘YES’. Candy’s eyes were so wide that I almost laughed and Laura looked really surprised.

Nancy asked if there was a message for us and the glass moved to the middle of the circle and then shot over to ‘YES’ again. I could feel the glass pulling but I wasn’t sure if anyone was pushing it or not. I am sure that Candy wasn’t pushing because she was too surprised and I know that I wasn’t.

Laura was laughing and asking if it always happened and Nancy said yes, it did. If there were spirits around then they always wanted to talk to living people.
Candy asked what the message was and the glass spelled out a word. It spelled D-A-N-G-E-R which is what Julie said in Wanda’s flat.

Sandra asked who was in danger and the glass spelled out E-V-E-R-Y-B-O-D-Y. That is the message we got last time.

Nancy asked if Julie was happy with the teddy bear she had bought but the glass didn’t move. She asked again but the glass stayed where it was. Then Nancy asked if Julie was there and the glass moved really quickly over to ‘NO’ and that is when I got a bit scared.

Sandra asked who was there and the glass moved really slowly over to the letter B and I knew right away what it was going to spell. And sure, really slowly, it spelled out B-E-E which is Belinda’s real name. Everyone was shocked then. Except for Laura. She wanted to know who Bee was and I told her that she was a girl who used to work for Oliver.

Then Candy said that the game was only to speak to dead people so it couldn’t be Bee because Bee wasn’t dead. I didn’t want to tell them that actually Bee was dead so I just stayed quiet. Nancy said that maybe Bee had died and she had something to tell us. So she asked if it was Bee who used to work for Oliver and the glass shot across the table to ‘YES’. Nancy asked if Bee was dead and the glass went slowly to the middle of the table and then shot back to ‘YES.’

Candy asked what had happened to Bee and the glass didn’t move. Candy asked again and the glass started to move. It spelled out M-U-R-D and then it was just moving to the letter E when Sandra stood up. She shouted at me that I was pushing the glass which wasn’t true and then she picked up the glass and threw it against the wall and then pushed all the letters of the table. I was shocked because honestly I wasn’t pushing the glass. Sandra was really angry and I thought she was going to hit me but she left the flat and Nancy went after her. I was really upset and I started crying and Candy and Wanda and Laura all hugged me and said that it wasn’t my fault which was true but I don’t understand why Sandra was so angry.

After a while I went home and then Oliver rang and said that I had three hours incall in the Carlton Hotel so I had to put on my make up and put on one of my Karen Millen dresses. I was busy all day because Vicky still has sores on her lips and Candy is having her period. After the outcall Oliver told me that Simon had booked me for three hours in the evening but before he came I had three one hour incalls. Busy, busy, busy.

The clinic

2007-10-27T11:43:00.001-07:00

When I woke up yesterday morning I was itching a lot and there was a white discharge again so I phoned Wanda and asked if she would go with me to see her doctor and she said that she wasn’t busy so she would. I went around to her apartment. The glass was still on the coffee table and she said that Julie had spent ages talking to them. Everyone was very sad. Nancy had bought a teddy bear for her and Julie said thank you for that but then Sandra wanted to know how Julie had died and that was when the whole story came out. I asked Wanda if Julie had said anything more about danger and she said no because they were all interested in how Julie had died. Julie had said that she didn’t know why her mother had killed her with the pillow but said that her father had left home when she was a baby. Actually I still think that it is all a joke, that someone is pushing the glass but I didn’t say that to Wanda because I know she believes in it. But I did buy her the doll called Julie because if she is real I do not want her to be sad.

Wanda had phoned to make an appointment at the clinic she uses and they weren’t busy and said we could go at eleven o’clock. We got a taxi to Harley Street and the doctor was a handsome man from New Zealand who was really sweet and didn’t ask me about my job. He tested me for everything including Aids and gave me a full examination and that was funny because I was lying on my back with my legs wide open and usually when I am like that the man is paying me but this time I was paying him. I kept laughing because it was funny and he thought he was tickling me and kept saying sorry. What also was funny was that he asked me some questions which he said he had to ask me before he could give me the Aids test and one of the questions was how many men I had had sex with in the last six months. I think if I told him the truth that he would be very shocked so I just lied and said three.

He said I didn’t have gonorrhoea which was good news, or syphilis, but he said I had chlamydia and I probably got it from a man who had NSU which is an STD. STD stands for sexually transmitted disease but I don’t know what NSU stands for but the doctor says it was not serious and I just need to take antibiotics for ten days and just to be on the safe side he would give me an injection too. He said I should tell my sexual contacts that I have chlamydia and they should get checked for NSU. I don’t think I can tell all my customers that I have an STD because then they will think that I am not professional.

When we were going home Wanda asked me what I thought about Oliver taking our passports and our ID cards and I said I thought it was okay if it meant we got new visas but she said she was a bit worried because if the police caught her then she would be in trouble because she didn’t have her passport. I said I didn’t think Oliver would keep them for long.

Actually I wanted to talk to Wanda about Belinda but I thought that if I did she might tell Cat and I would get into trouble. Then I thought that I might go to Thai Square and talk to some of the girls from A1 because Belinda has a lot of friends there. Actually I suppose that I should say ‘had’ now and not ‘has’ because she is dead. My plan was to go to Thai Square at about eleven o’clock but I couldn’t because I was very busy.

I had two outcall jobs and three incall jobs. Simon phoned to tell me that he had tried to book me for three hours but that he had been told that I was busy all evening and I said that yes that was true. Simon was sad but there was nothing I could do. The first customer to book me gets me, I cannot cancel a booking just because a regular customer wants to see me.

At midnight I phoned Nancy to see if she was busy and she said that she was. She said she had spoken to Sandra and that Sandra was very busy too. Nancy said that Candy was having her period and that Vicky had cold sores all over her lips so neither of them could work and Oliver was giving us their customers. I asked Nancy if her period had come yet and she said that it hadn’t. I asked her if she was worried that she might be pregnant but she said she didn’t care and anyway her customers wouldn’t be able to tell. You know, if she is pregnant I don’t think she will know who the father is, which I think is quite bad really.

By the time I had finished work I was really tired and I had earned more than £850. Do you know how much money I have hidden under the carpet now? Actually I shouldn’t tell anyone because it is a lot. I will send some more to my mother and I will ask Vince if he can send some to my bank. It is not a good idea to have too much money in my flat.

Busy day

2007-10-26T07:20:00.000-07:00

I was very busy yesterday. So was Vince. He phoned twice during the day to see if I was okay which was nice of him.

My first customer came eleven o’clock which is early because usually customers come after mid-day. I was actually quite tired because I didn’t sleep much he night before. I had two more customers in the afternoon, both incall. I was running out of condoms so I went to buy some. I looked through the window of Boots and I didn’t see the Indian guy so I went inside but you know what, just as I was at the cash register he came up behind me and said ‘Sawasdee krup’ and made me jump. Then he looked at the twelve dozen condoms in my basket and the KY Jelly and he smiled like he knew what I was doing. I really hate him so I just paid for what I had bought and didn’t say anything to him.

At six o’clock Wanda phoned me and asked if I wanted to go to her room to talk to Julie with Sandra and Nancy but I said I couldn’t because I already had a two-hour booking at the Four Seasons Hotel. The customer at the Four Seasons was Italian and he was quite handsome. He was from Milano which is what the Italians call Milan, I think. He gave me a 100 Euro tip and said he would book me next time he was in London and I gave him my phone number.

In the taxi back to my apartment Oliver told me that I had an incall booking from a new customer and that Simon had booked me for three hours incall at ten o’clock. I barely had time to think all day, which was a good thing really because every time I think about Belinda I feel sad, sad, sad.

Simon left at one o’clock in the morning. He kept asking me to be his girlfriend and to stop work, which is a bit boring actually. But he did bring a pizza with him and three movies including one called Next about a man who can see into the future which was confusing but quite exciting. I wish I could see into the future, that’s for sure!

At two o’clock in the morning Wanda phoned me, very excited. She said that Julie had come to talk to them again and that this time she had said that she had been murdered. Can you believe that? Julie said that it was her own mother who had killed her by smothering her with a pillow. I am not sure if they are really talking to a ghost, I think it is more likely to be someone pushing the glass, probably Sandra.
Before I went to sleep I sent a text message to my Italian customer and to ten other customers and special messages to Peter and Robert. I didn’t send a message to Simon.

The papers

2007-10-25T10:43:00.000-07:00

I hardly slept last night. Vince did and he snored a bit but that was okay because even if I had my eyes closed I didn’t feel as if I was alone. He went out in the morning and came back with Macdonalds muffins for breakfast but really I wasn’t hungry. I phoned Belinda’s number but her phone was still off. At about eleven o’clock Vince said that I should show him where Belinda’s flat is so I went with him. All the police tape had gone and it was as if it had never happened. I showed Vince where the flat was and where to press the bell and he said that I should go home because it wouldn’t be good for another Thai girl to be seen nearby so I did what he said.

About half an hour later he came to my flat. This time he had brought two Starbucks coffees and a whole watermelon with him. It was so nice of him to remember that I liked watermelon and actually I did manage to eat some even though my stomach did not feel good at all. Vince said that he had rung Belinda’s bell but that no one had answered. Then he rang a neighbour’s bell and a neighbour said that yes, a girl had been killed and that she was Asian. Vince said the neighbour didn’t know how the girl was killed because the police weren’t saying. Vince said there was no CCTV at the entrance to the flat so the police wouldn’t know who had been to the building. I am surprised that Belinda didn’t live in a building with CCTV because all working girls need CCTV to be safe.

I am worried about Belinda’s family because I am not sure if the police would know who she is or where she is from. When a girl comes to England on a contract that somebody has paid, she usually has to give her passport to her sponsor for security. That means that Sandra will have Belinda’s passport and maybe her ID card too. If Belinda rented her room in her own name then the police would know who she is but a lot of working girls don’t use their real names. I don’t know what to do because if I contact Neil to tell him what I know then maybe I will get Sandra and Oliver angry at me and I do not want that. But if the police don’t know who she is, what will they do with her body. She is a Buddhist so they have to treat her body properly and there have to be monks there when they burn her.

At noon Oliver phoned me to say that I had a booking for one o’clock. I didn’t want to work but I had no reason to say no so I said yes. He asked me if I was feeling okay and I said I was fine, that my stomach wasn’t hurting any more. He didn’t sound as if he was happy with me, but I pretended that everything was okay.

Before the customer came, Vince went out and got two free newspapers and a copy of the Evening Standard., which looks like a free newspaper but which you have to pay for. We read them but there was nothing about a girl being killed in Paddington. All the newspapers were talking about the boss of the Tube who has been given £500,000 to leave his job, The Tube is what English people call their underground train. There is an underground train in Bangkok but it is very small, much smaller than the Tube. Half a million pounds is a lot of money. I would have to work at this job for almost four years to earn that much, and sleep with more than a thousand men! I bet the boss of The Tube didn’t have sleep with a thousand men! The other big story was about the little girl who had gone missing in Portugal while she was on holiday with her family. You know in Thailand a lot of children go missing every year. Cambodian people cut off their hands or their feet and then use them to go begging. It is true but it is too horrible to imagine.

There was a story about an Arab boy who had been shot and the police were asking for anyone who had seen anything to call them. I don’t understand why there wasn’t a story about Belinda in the paper. In Thailand if there is a murder the Thai newspapers have photographs on the front page. You can see the blood and everything. Actually it is quite gory. Vince said that the police might know who the killer is so they keep the story out of the papers so that they won’t scare him off. I didn’t understand that but I think that Vince knows more about the police than I do.

He went just before my first customer came. During the day I had six customers, all of them incall and all of them for one hour. I had sex with six men and I earned £600 for me and £300 for Oliver. I was tired and sore when I had finished, which was at three o’clock in the morning. I was too tired to send good night texts to my customers but I did send one to Vince to thank him for being such a good friend. I did sleep but I kept having bad dreams, mostly about somebody killing Belinda with a knife.

Bad day

2007-10-24T08:52:00.001-07:00

I woke up early yesterday so I went to school. I felt very pleased with myself because last week I didn’t go at all. Laura wasn’t there and John called me into his office and asked me where Laura was. I said I didn’t know. He said that Laura hadn’t been to school for two weeks and she didn’t answer her phone when he called her. I said that I thought she might have had the flu but of course I know that is not true. She is working very hard and drinking quite a lot so I am not surprised that she has not been to school. Actually I think now John is more interested in Laura than me and that is good news for me. But I do not want him to know that Laura is now a working girl so when I got home I called her and told her that she should go to school some times. She told me that last time she was in John’s office he had tried to kiss her and I said that she should just keep out of his office. I said that we could both go to school together and that way he wouldn’t be able to try to kiss us and she said that was a good idea.

I had some watermelon to eat and then I phoned Belinda to see if she wanted to go to see the doctor with me but her phone was switched off. I showered and called her again and her phone was still switched off and I thought that maybe her battery had died because that sometimes happens to me so I put on my coat and walked around to her apartment. I was so shocked when I got to the road where her apartment was because there were two police cars there and an ambulance and there were strips of tape around the lampposts to keep people away. There were lots of uniformed policemen around and I knew straight away that something was wrong. There were some people standing near the police cars watching but I didn’t want to stand too close so I stood outside a shop and pretended to be looking in the window. After a bit another car arrived and parked next to the police cars. Two men got out and one of them was Neil, the policeman that had come to see me, and I knew then for sure that something had happened to Belinda. Neil and the other man went inside the building.

I had a really bad feeling in my stomach like I was going to be sick. The ambulance was just waiting and there was no siren or anything so it wasn’t as if she was ill and they were rushing her to the hospital. Then a white van arrived and three people got out in white paper suits and hoods and they were carrying big black cases and they went inside.

I wanted to phone somebody and talk about it because I couldn’t because I didn’t want Oliver and Cat and Sandra to know that I was going to see Belinda. I stayed in front of the shop shivering because it was cold but I didn’t want to go home. After about an hour two men came out with a stretcher and there was something on the stretcher and I was sure that it was Belinda’s body. They put it in the ambulance and then they drove off but they weren’t in a hurry. I went home then and I cried and I cried and I cried.

I don’t know what happened but all I can think is that the robber who was stealing from working girls killed her and that was why Neil was there. It was so unfair because she had stopped work and she was going to go to New York. I really liked Belinda, she was actually a very nice girl and she had a good heart.

In the afternoon I went outside. There are three free newspapers that people give away on the streets of London and I got all three and read every page but there was nothing in it about Belinda. I went back to the flat. My phone rang and it was Oliver to tell me that I had two hours outcall at the Savoy Hotel so I had to dress up and do my make up and get a taxi. The customer was Asian, from Malaysia, and he was quite a nice man but all I could think about was Belinda and what had happened to her. The customer kept asking me what was wrong but of course I couldn’t tell him.

I went home and I watched the six o’clock news on television but there was nothing about a girl being killed. Then the phone rang and it was Oliver and he was angry because the customer at the Savoy had complained that I didn’t give him a good service. Oliver scolded me and said that customers paid a lot of money and they expected good service. I said I was sorry and told him that I wasn’t feeling well and that I had a bad pain in my stomach and that I wanted to finish for the day. That made him even more angry and he asked me if I wanted to work for the agency or not and I said that tomorrow I would be okay but that I was too sick to work today.
I couldn’t eat or anything, I was so worried. I wanted to talk to somebody but I didn’t know who I could talk to. I know that Robert would want to help but he is a good man and I don’t want to worry him about my problem. I thought about phoning Neil the policeman but he might not know that Belinda worked for Oliver’s agency and if he knew then he might want to talk to Oliver and Oliver might be angry at me. I was thinking so much that I got sick and I threw up in the bathroom. Then I started crying because I was sad, sad, sad. And I was a bit scared too.

There was only one person I could think of ringing and that was Vince. I phoned him and I started crying and he said that he would come around to see me and he did, he was there after twenty minutes and he was very worried about me. He sat on the sofa and held me while I cried. I told him what had happened and he said that he was sorry. He was so gentle and kind. He is real friend. I asked him why there hadn’t been a story in the newspapers or on the television. He said that newspapers were printed the night before so if there was a story it would be in tomorrow’s newspapers. And television didn’t usually report murders unless it was someone important or unless children were hurt. There were more than two hundred murders every year in London, he said. And he said that sometimes the police kept the details quiet because they didn’t want anyone to know about their investigation. He asked me if I was sure that Belinda had been murdered and I told him everything that I had seen and I showed him what happened when I phoned her number. The phone was still switched off. I said that I was sure but he said that he would go around in the morning and ask some questions and see what he could find out.

You know, Vince was so kind. He didn’t try to kiss me or do anything, he just held me and talked to me. He was just what I needed, a real friend who cares about me. He stayed with me all night and we lay on the bed together and he held me and told me that everything would be okay even though I know it won’t be okay because nothing will bring Belinda back.

The Candyman

2007-10-23T11:11:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I was busy, busy, busy. I had six customers during the day. Once I had one customer going down in the lift as another customer was coming up and I hardly had any time to shower. One of the six was Vince, which was good because time with Vince is always fun. He looks a bit rough but he has a very good heart and I think he really cares about me. He says he is earning very good money selling drugs and unless he does something stupid he says that the police will never catch him. I though all drugs were controlled by the mafia but Vince says he works for himself. He buys his drugs from an Irish man who he has known for years and he only sells to people that he knows. It’s not as if he walks around the streets trying to sell drugs. It isn’t like that. People phone him up and he delivers, like a pizza service. Most people don’t even know his name, they just call him The Candyman. In a way our jobs are very similar. The police don’t really care about what we do unless we make a nuisance of ourselves.

Vince was very gentle with me when he made love to me, like he always is. He’s quite tender and he kisses my neck and whispers my name which is nice. I told him my name the second time he came to see me. Actually I tell all my customers my name because it is only my nickname. All Thai people have a real name which is on their passports and ID cards and all documents, but they also have a nickname that is the name that most people use. Actually Thai people can have several nicknames. Like my mother and father call me Jar which means sweet but my schoolfriends call me something else and my grandmother, my Yai, has another name for me. It can be confusing sometimes!

Actually yesterday I wanted to go to see the doctor about my itch and my discharge but I was just too busy. I phoned Wanda to see if she would go with me but she said that she was too busy, too. I think everyone is busy at the moment. Maybe the cold weather makes people horny. In fact the weather does make a difference to how busy we are. If it is raining we do not get many customers and if it is very hot like it was for one week in the summer then we don’t get many customers. The best day is actually a cold, dry day and yesterday was a cold, dry day.

My first customer came at mid-day. His name was John, but I don’t think that was his real name. A lot of customers say they are called John. Or Dave. They are the two most popular names of my customers. John didn’t talk to me and didn’t look me in the eye no matter how much I smiled. When we were on the bed he had his eyes closed most of the time, so maybe he was thinking about someone else.

My second customer was called Steve and he was a bit fat and didn’t smell very good so I spent a long time in the bath with him to make sure that he was clean. Actually I made love to him in the bath, and I made sure that he came so that all I had to do in the bedroom was to give him a massage.

Then Sandra phoned me to ask if I had spoken to Belinda and I didn’t know what to say. I know that Cat and Sandra are good friends so maybe Cat told her that I had been to Thai Square with Belinda. I said I hadn’t which was a lie but I knew that Sandra would be too shy to tell me that she knew I was lying. Sandra said she was very angry with Belinda because she hadn’t paid her the money for the contract. I think she will be much more angry if she knows that Belinda is going to live in New York, but I didn’t say anything.

I did phone Belinda but she didn’t answer my call and then Oliver phoned me to say that I had another booking. He was a new customer and it was so funny because he started telling me about the blog he had read that was written by a Thai working girl in London and it was me but he didn’t know. I wanted to tell him but I thought that wasn’t a good idea. I better not say too much about him in case he recognises himself. He said he really enjoyed reading the blog but he didn’t know if it was true and I wanted so much to tell him that yes it is all true!

After he had gone I phoned Belinda and told her that Sandra wanted to talk to her. Belinda laughed and said that she didn’t want to talk to her. Really I don’t think Belinda is being fair because she does owe money to Sandra. But Sandra owes me money and she never mentions it so maybe it is fair. The English have a saying. What goes around comes around. So what Sandra is doing to me, Belinda is doing to her.

I told Belinda about my itch and my discharge and she said that I might have gonnorea which needs treating very quickly but is easy to cure. She said that she knew a good doctor that was a woman who has a surgery near her apartment and she said she would go with me which was really nice of her. I said I would go around to her place in the morning.

The last customer of the day was Robert so I didn’t eat anything during the afternoon so that I would be hungry when he gave me his peanut butter sandwiches. He is always happier when I eat all the sandwich and drink my milk shake. I do wish he would let me do something for him to show how grateful I am for his help but he keeps telling me that all he wants to do is to kiss my feet. He is a strange man but he has a very good heart. I took £1000 with me to give him as I have to pay back what I owe him. He laughed and took it but then he gave it back to me and said that was for my time and a tip, too. I kissed him on the cheek and said ‘Thank you, Daddy’ and I was so happy.

Warning

2007-10-22T15:18:00.000-07:00

Wanda phoned me yesterday morning and asked if I would go to her apartment because Nancy and Sandra were going and they were going to talk to Julie. I said I would even though I really didn’t want to. Actually I wanted to ask the girls about the itch and the discharge I had so I bought a watermelon and some oranges and I took that around to Wanda’s flat.

They already had the letters around the glass but we ate the fruit first and talked about our customers. I told them about Vince and how he could get cocaine for customers if they wanted but Wanda and Sandra said they already had customers who could get cocaine for them. Sandra said she quite liked taking cocaine but she never paid for it herself, she would only use it if her customer bought some. Wanda told me about a film producer who had been seeing her for months. His name was Paul and he liked to make breakfast for her, muesli and bananas. It sounded to me like he was a bit like Robert and liked to take care of girls. Wanda said he couldn’t make love, he could only come when she played with him and that sounded a bit like Robert too, except Robert plays with himself. Men can be strange sometimes. Sandra told us about an American singer who comes to see her who has the biggest dick she has ever seen, bigger than a man’s arm, she said, but Sandra often exaggerates. Nancy told us about two teenagers who come to see her. They are brothers and actually only one of them phones to book her but they both come to see her. Nancy was laughing and said that actually she would FFF because they were such good fun.

I told the girls about my problem and Sandra said that when she had a problem she went to see a Chinese doctor in Chinatown who gave her some herbs that stopped her itching. I am not sure if I trust Chinese doctors, though. I asked them what they thought was wrong and they said I probably had an infection and that I must have got it from a customer. Nancy said she never got sick but I don’t believe that because she makes love without a condom. I know that it must have happened at the house at St John’s Wood so it is Oliver’s fault that I am sick. Wanda said it could be lots of things like a fungal infection which meant I had to take some tablets or it might be an STD. She didn’t know what STD meant but it was something you catch from a customer. STD can be fixed with antibiotics. In Thailand you can buy antibiotics in any pharmacy but in England you have to get them from a doctor, she said. I said I didn’t know any doctors in London and she said she had a card for a clinic in Harley Street and she gave me a business card. I asked if they would want to know about my job but Wanda said that they didn’t care, all they care about is money.

When we had finished the fruit we sat around the coffee table and put our hands on the glass. It started to move in small circles and Wanda asked if there was anyone there and the glass moves to ‘Yes’. Then she asked who was there and it spelled out J-U-L-I-A which was strange because last time it was Julie. Wanda asked her to spell it again and the glass moved to spell J-U-L-I-E so we knew it was her. Then the glass slowly spelled out T-H-A-N-K Y-O-U F-O-R T-H-E P-R-E-S-E-N-T-S.

Nancy asked if Julie wanted anything else and the glass spelled out T-E-D-D-Y B-A-R-E. Actually I thought that was strange because a Teddy Bear is B-E-A-R and not B-A-R-E. Maybe Julie can’t spell but I think a young farang girl would know how to spell bear. But I know that Nancy isn’t very good at spelling and neither is Sandra so one of them could be pushing the glass.

Wanda then said that last time Julie had said there was danger and the glass moved to ‘Yes.’ Wanda asked who was in danger and the glass spelled out E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E. That was a bit scary actually. I was looking very carefully at everybody’s fingers but I didn’t see anyone pushing. When we started we were laughing and joking but now we weren’t laughing.

Wanda asked where the danger was coming from and the glass spelled out O-L-I-V-E-R. We all stared at the glass on the letter R. Why would there be danger from Oliver? That didn’t make any sense.

Wanda asked why but the glass didn’t move. She asked why again and then the glass spelled out C-O-L-D. Then it spelled out D-A-R-K. Then it stopped. Then it spelled out D-A-N-G-E-R.

Then the phone rang and it was Oliver. Can you believe it? It was exactly the same as happened last time. Oliver said that Wanda had a booking so we all had to go.

Nancy, Sandra and I went to have a coffee at Starbucks in Edgware Road and we talked about what Julie had said. Nancy and Sandra believe in ghosts but I am not so sure. I don’t believe that we are in danger. In fact, my life is better now than it has been for a long time. Then Nancy’s phone rang and it was Oliver telling her that it was a booking so we all went home. I didn’t have a booking so I lay on my sofa and watched DVDs until it was time to go to Sloane Square with my money.

I went to Sloane Square on my own this time. Alice, Rachel, Candy and Vicky were already there, cooking with Cat in the kitchen. Oliver was drinking beer and watching the television. He smiled at me and I was fairly sure that Cat hadn’t told him that she had seen me with Belinda in Thai Square. With farangs it is fairly easy to see what they are thinking from their faces. With Thai people it is not so easy. Thai people always smile, no matter how they feel inside. Thai people smile when they are happy, when they are sad, when they are angry, when they are sorry, when they are confused. Even if they are thinking about killing you a Thai person will still smile. I went into the kitchen and Cat smiled at me and I couldn’t tell if she was angry at me or not.

This week I had £1,850 for Oliver which was almost as much as Alice, who had £1,950. Rachel had £1,750, the same as last week, and so did Laura. Laura is doing really well. She is a little bit crazy, though, and was drinking brandy and asking when we were going to play cards because she felt lucky. Sandra had £1,350 and Nancy had £1,300. Candy and Vicky both had £1,500 and Wanda had £900. She said business wasn’t good because of the ghost in her apartment but Oliver told her not to be so silly.

Alice asked when we would be getting our passports and ID cards back but Oliver said he didn’t know, he was still talking to his contact about getting us visas. Actually when he said that he looked uncomfortable and I think maybe he was lying. But Cat smiled and told us not to worry, that everything was okay. Then we played cards and we all lost money, except for Oliver who was lucky, as usual.

The VIP

2007-10-21T10:15:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I saw a VIP customer. That is what Oliver called him but I didn’t recognise him. It wasn’t like when Nancy and I saw the famous actor. But he was a VIP that is for sure because he had bodyguards, a lot of bodyguards.

Actually I didn’t sleep much last night because I was so worried about Cat seeing me at Thai Square. I mean, I am not sure if she did see me or not but if she did and she told Oliver then Oliver would know that I lied to him and he would be angry. Also, if Cat saw me then she saw Belinda too and I know that Oliver does not want me to talk to Belinda. And there were girls from the A1 agency there too and if Oliver thinks I am talking to girls from an agency then he might think I want to work for another agency and that might make him angry too. I jumped when the phone rang and I was a bit scared when I saw that it was Oliver but when I spoke to him he didn’t sound angry at all, he just said that I had a VIP customer at the Dorchester Hotel and that I should wear something smart and a coat and that I should phone him from reception and that someone would come down to collect me. He wouldn’t tell me the name of the customer and he has never done that before. Oliver said the customer would pay me in dollars and that was okay. He should give me $800.

I took a taxi to the Dorchester, which is one of the best hotels in London. Only very rich people can stay in the Dorchester. I have actually been there several times and it has always been to see Americans. I got to the hotel and phoned Oliver and he said to wait, and after ten minutes a very good looking man in a black suit came over to me. My heart actually turned over he was so good looking and I thought he was the customer and I was very happy but he wasn’t the customer, he was a bodyguard. He had a thing in his ear and once he put his hand to his mouth and spoke into his sleeve which looked quite funny. As he spoke to me I saw two other men watching us. They wore good suits too and had things in their ears. I went up in the lift with the good-looking bodyguard. He didn’t say anything to me in the lift and even though I smiled sweetly at him and asked him his name he just looked at me. I think he was smiling a bit, though. I wondered what he would do if I knelt down and gave him a blow job, but that was just me thinking crazy like I do sometimes.

The bodyguard took me down a corridor where there was a man and a woman who were both smartly dressed and with the same things in their ears. The woman was holding a black walkie-talkie. Neither of them smiled at me but the woman opened the door and nodded for me to go inside.

The room was huge. The biggest I have ever seen in a hotel. And the furniture was lovely, the sort of things you see in the furniture department in Harrods. There was no bed but there were three doors so I guess they led to where the bedrooms where. The VIP was quite old, maybe sixty or more, with grey hair combed back. Actually he looked a bit like Bill Clinton but honestly it was not Bill Clinton. I did not recognise him at all, actually, but he must have been very important because he had so many bodyguards. He was wearing a bathrobe that was quite short so I could see his knobbly knees. He didn’t say anything, he just gave me an envelope and I looked inside and there were ten $100 notes. I said that he only had to pay me $800 and he said that there was a $200 tip. That was a surprise because usually the customer gives me a tip afterwards but giving me the tip first was okay.

The VIP took off his robe. His body wasn’t very nice. It was actually older looking than his face and there were red patches on his thighs that didn’t look healthy. His dick was very big. Very, very, big. But it wasn’t hard. He told me to get undressed and I did and then he told me to give him a blow job and I did. He got hard very quickly which was a surprise because usually old men take a long time to get hard.

He was quite rough and held my head and pushed himself deep into me which I don’t like but I let him do it. Then he told me to get on the bed and he made love to me doggy-style which hurt a lot. I told him he was hurting me but he didn’t care, in fact he did it harder. He was so deep inside me that I was crying a bit. I remembered what Nancy had said when she had seen the man with the big dick in the sexy movie we saw in the house in St John’s Wood about the dick banging her chin but actually a big dick is not that funny if the guy is not gentle.

Then he told me to lie on my back and he put a pillow under my bum to raise me up a bit and he made love to me hard again. The pillow meant that he went deeper inside me and it hurt a lot but he didn’t care. Actually his face looked quite angry as he was having sex and he kept swearing and saying something that sounded like ‘gook’ which I don’t understand but which I don’t think is a good word. He grunted when he came and then he rolled off and was breathing so heavily that I thought he was having a heart attack.

After he had come I went to the bathroom to pee and it itched again, more than before and I still had the white discharge. I didn’t eat anything spicy the night before so I don’t think it was anything to do with what I had to eat. I am not sure what to do because I am scared that if I go to a doctor they will want to know what I do for a living and I don’t want to tell them that I am a working girl. I might go to a chemists and ask if they have some medicine but I don’t want to go to Boots because the Indian guy is there who keeps saying ‘Sawasdee krup’ and I don’t want to talk to him.

When I came out of the bathroom the VIP had put his robe back on and he was talking on the phone. He lowered his phone when I came out as if he didn’t want me to overhear. The good-looking bodyguard took me down in the lift to reception and actually opened the door of a taxi for me, which was very polite. I sort of hoped that he would ask me for my phone number, but he didn’t.

When I was in the taxi back to my flat I phoned Oliver to tell him that everything was okay and he told me that I had a two-hour incall booking. It was Jean, the French lawyer who had seen me on Thursday. I was actually pleased that Jean had booked me again because he was nice and his accent was quite sexy. You know, he brought flowers to give me, they were lilies that smelled really sweet. He gave me the flowers and kissed me on the cheek like we were on a date. But he gave me my money right away and I put it on the coffee table then opened a bottle of wine for him. We kissed on the sofa and I gave him oral, soft and slow and then he said he wanted to make love to me on the sofa so we did, though first I had to get a condom from the bedroom.

Then he asked me if I could get him some more cocaine and I called Vince. Vince said it would take him an hour to get to Bayswater and I told that to Jean and he said okay, no problem, and that he would book me for another two hours. I was so pleased because that meant I had worked for two hours outcall and four hours incall in one day which meant good money and only two customers. I phoned Oliver and told him that Jean wanted two hours more and Oliver said okay and said that Jean could have a discount for the second two hours. Oliver said he was a good customer and had been with most of the girls at the agency which made me a bit unhappy because I thought maybe I was special.

I had a bath with him and then I gave him oral in the bedroom until Vince came. Jean gave me £300 and I gave £200 to Vince and gave the cocaine to Jean. Jean put the cocaine on the coffee table and made it into lines and he sniffed two and then asked me if I wanted some. I was going to say no but then I realised I was a bit tired after having sex with the VIP so I said yes, I would have some. I sniffed one line up each nostril and almost immediately I was not tired. In fact I felt full of energy. We made love on the sofa and it was only when he was inside me that I remembered that he had not put a condom on. I told him to stop but he said he couldn’t and then I thought that it was probably okay because he was a good customer and anyway he was already inside me so I carried on. Actually, there is more feeling when there is no condom so I do understand why some men don’t want to use them. I asked him not to come inside me and he said okay and just before he came he pulled himself out and came over my stomach. Jean is a good man and I hope he will be a regular customer. I didn’t ask him for his phone number last time but this time I did and before I went to sleep I sent him a text message saying that I had enjoyed my time with him and that I missed him. Then I sent the same message to another ten customers and I sent a message to Robert saying ‘God night, Daddy’ and a message to Peter saying that I hope he had sweet dreams.

Thai Square

2007-10-20T06:21:00.000-07:00

I wanted to go to school yesterday but I didn’t wake up until after mid-day so I couldn’t. John keeps phoning saying that he wants to see me in his office but I don’t know if he wants to talk about school or if he wants to go out with me.

I did have time to go to the post office so I put more money into DVD cases and posted them to my mum in Thailand. This time I sent £3,000 in fifty pound notes.

During the day Belinda phoned me to see if I wanted to go to the Thai Square bar with her in the evening and I said that I would if I wasn’t working but that on Fridays I was usually busy. She said it would be okay and that I should just tell Oliver that I had a bad stomach because a working girl cannot work if she has a bad stomach. I said okay because I really wanted to talk to her again.

Oliver phoned me at mid-day to say that I had a booking for domination with Candy again. It was for two hours starting at one o’clock so I went straight around to her apartment to get ready. Candy was wearing a red plastic dress with holes cut out for her breasts and thigh-length black plastic boots and she had painted her nails a bright red and she had on bright red nail varnish. Actually she looked very sexy. She helped me get changed into a very strange dress that was just strips of leather held together by studs that showed off most of my body. She gave me a pair of thigh-length boots and I put them on then she put lipstick on me. Lots of lipstick. Then we stood and looked at each other in the mirror and said that we both looked very sexy. The customer was called Walter and he worked for a bank. I thought about asking him about how I could open a bank account in England but after I had seen what Candy did to him I didn’t want to ask him for his advice. He wanted Candy to use a strap on him while I held him down. Candy had a really big strap-on, much bigger than the one the girl had used on me at the party in St John’s Wood. He kept begging her to stop but he didn’t use the safe word which meant that really he didn’t want her to stop. The strap on was so big that it must have really hurt. He kept calling her Mistress which was quite funny. Mistress can be the same as Mia Noi, a girl that a married man takes care of, but in domination Mistress means something else. Mistress means that she has power over the man.

Candy told me that sometimes men liked a woman to have power over them, especially men who are in important jobs. They spend all day telling people what to do and to relax they want someone to tell them what to do. But I do not understand why he wants a dildo up his bum. I think that maybe he is gay and that really he wants a man to do it to his bum.

Candy spent thirty minutes doing that to him, then she tied him to the bed and put a blindfold on him and then we both hit him with leather whips. Candy made him beg us to hit him and every time we did he had to say ‘thank you, Mistress.’

While we were doing it Candy talked to me in Thai, telling me about the last time she went shopping with Alice and Rachel and the fun that they had. I think the customer would be annoyed if he knew what we were talking about because we were supposed to be working but Candy said that he didn’t understand Thai.

Candy said that Walter liked to make himself come but he wanted to do that while she dominated me. She had done it before with Nancy and was I okay and I said sure, so long as it didn’t hurt too much. She took the blindfold off him and untied him, then he helped tie me up and Candy hit me with a leather whip as Walter sat in a chair and made himself come. It didn’t hurt. Actually it just felt funny. Candy gave him a saucer and told him that he had to come into the saucer. When he had come, Candy made him lick it up. Can you believe it? She made him lick his own sperm. Then she made him kneel down in front of us and kiss our feet and thank us. He must have really enjoyed it because he gave us both a £100 tip.

After Walter had gone I used Candy’s bathroom to shower. I went to pee and it itched when I peed and I had a white discharge which I think is not a good thing. I asked Candy what she thought and she said that it was nothing to worry about and that maybe I had been eating too much spicy food. Maybe she was right. It only itched a bit and it’s not as if it hurt or anything. Maybe it will go away on its own.

I went home and I had two customers for incall, one at six o’clock and one at eight o’clock. The first one was called Ryan and the second was called Danny and it was funny because they were both from Ireland and they both looked the same with black hair and blue eyes. Now when I think back I can’t even remember which is which. I asked them both for their phone numbers and told them that I really liked them and wanted them to come back and see me again.

Belinda phoned me at ten o’clock and asked me if I still wanted to go to Thai Square and I said yes. I sent Oliver a text saying that I had a bad stomach and that I couldn’t work any more that night and then I got changed. I wore one of my Karen Millen dresses that is not too sexy. It is one that I wear when I do outcall to a good hotel. And I wore some black Prada shoes that are really cute but are comfortable too. Prada make really good shoes. Now I have five pairs. I like buying shoes, especially shoes by Prada and Gucci.

Belinda phoned me to tell me when she was downstairs in a taxi and I went down and we went to Thai Square. Belinda paid for the taxi which was nice of her because Nancy and Sandra always expect me to pay. The nightclub is downstairs under a Thai restaurant. Belinda said that the food there was quite good but that she preferred the food in Blue Elephant. The woman who owns Blue Elephant is a Thai lady who married a farang and now she has restaurants all over the world, even in Dubai which is in the Middle East.

The nightclub was quite busy with lots of Asian girls. Not all of them were Thai but most were, and there were a lot of Asian men there. Belinda took me to the bar and bought me a Bacardi Breezer and one for herself. She pointed at a group of pretty girls sitting on a sofa and said that they worked for A1 which is the biggest Asian agency in London. They were sitting with a ladyboy who Belinda said was one of the people who answered the phones for them and did the bookings. I have looked at the A1 website and it is true, they do have a lot of girls. Maybe more than fifty. And you know what, they have ladyboys on the website, too. Most of the ladyboys are not very pretty, really, and they look like men with long hair. I told Belinda that I do not understand men who want to have sex with ladyboys. If they are real men they would make love to women. If they are gay, then they will make love to men. Why would they want to make love to a man who is pretending to be a woman? It is pretending because even if they have breasts and long hair they are still men. Belinda said that she didn’t understand either, though she knew that a lot of farangs liked anal sex and she didn’t understand that. She said that the pussy was for making love and the bum was for shitting and it didn’t make sense to her to mix them up and that made me laugh. I said that I never did anal sex and she said that she did but she made the customer pay extra for it, sometimes as much as £100 extra. We were laughing but I felt a bit sad because I remembered what had happened in the house at St John’s Wood. They made me do anal there, even though I didn’t want to.

Two of the A1 girls came to the bar to buy drinks and Belinda introduced me. Their names were Poy and Fun. They were quite pretty but had very dark skin. I think they were from Isarn. Belinda asked them about the girl who had been attacked and they said that she was still in hospital. Luckily in England when you are in hospital you don’t have to pay because in Thailand you have to pay a lot of money when you are very sick. Poy said that she had heard that two other girls had been attacked and the police had a picture of what they though he looked like but they still hadn’t caught him. I told her about the policeman who had come to see me and Fun said that he had come to see her, too. The police really care about the working girls in London. The police in London are really nice, I think. In Thailand you have to be careful of the police. If you have an enemy and he has friends who are policemen then you have a big problem. That is why Kung had to give me my house, because Peter had friends who were big policemen.

Belinda told Poy and Fun that she was giving up work and that her big American customer was going to take care of her. They squealed and hugged her and told her how lucky she was. Poy said that was the dream of a lot of working girls, to find a man who can take care of them. But that is not my dream. I want to work and make money so that I can help my family myself.

Then another girl came to the bar. Her name was Moon and she worked for A1, too. Belinda introduced me and said that Moon had used to work for Oliver but she had stopped after a customer had forced her to have sex without a condom. Moon had complained to Oliver but Oliver said there was nothing he could do about it but Moon found out that the customer was a friend of Oliver’s and that he was from Lithuania. The customer was one of the men who had just been sent to prison, said Moon. Oliver was a bad man, she said, and he worked for the Lithuanian mafia who were even more dangerous than the Russian mafia. She said it would be better for me if I did not work for Oliver because he did not care about his girls, he only cared about money. I did not know what to say because Oliver has always been good to me but it is true that he didn’t help me when I complained about what had happened in the house in St John’s Wood.

Belinda and I went to sit with the A1 girls and we had a good time. The girls said that bar was a good place to meet Asian guys and even farangs and that the men usually didn’t know that they were working girls. I said that I didn’t want to meet farangs or Asian men because I didn’t want to FFF, I just wanted to work. The girls wanted to know what FFF meant and I told them it meant Fuck For Free and they all laughed at that. Fon said that she never did FFF. Even if she met a guy who didn’t know that she was a working girl she could still get him to spend a lot of money on her. She showed us the Cartier watch she was wearing and said that a guy she had met in Thai Square had bought it for her. It was a nice watch.

I had three Bacardi Breezers which is a lot for me because usually I do not drink, but I felt happy because now I have my house and work is going well and my life is quite good now. We were laughing and joking and telling stories about customers but then I looked across the bar and saw Cat. Cat was with another girl who I did not recognise and I am not sure if she saw me. I told Belinda that I had to go home. She asked me what was wrong but I couldn’t tell her, I just rushed out, keeping my head down. I hope and hope that Cat didn’t see me because if she did see me then she will tell Oliver and he will know that I lied to him.

Thank you, Peter!

2007-10-19T08:30:00.001-07:00

My mother phoned me yesterday. It is quite unusual for her to phone me and first I thought something was wrong with Daeng and I was quite scared but then she said it was about my house so I was relieved. I worry about my house, of course, but my son is far more important to me.

My mother said that Kung had come to her house with some policemen. One was a very big policeman from Udon Thani. Kung looked scared and he had a cut on his face as if someone had hit him. Kung had some papers with him and he gave them to my mother. The big policeman said that Kung was transferring the house to me and that everything was in my name. Then he told Kung to apologise to my mother and he did and he waied her. My mother said there were tears in Kung’s eyes. Then the policemen took him away. I told my mother to keep the papers safe. I told my mother that she should move into my house with Daeng until I return to Thailand. That way she can take care of it. My father can stay there too.

I am not sorry for Kung, not really. He tricked me into doing this job and he wanted to steal my money, so everything that has happened is his own fault. I know what happened. Peter had helped me. So I sent Peter a text message to say thank you and an hour later I got one back saying ‘You’re welcome’. I am so lucky to have a friend like Peter.

Later I phoned Kung to see if he was okay but he did not answer my call. I think maybe now he is scared of me. Now I am happy. Now I have my own house and I can live there with Daeng and we will have a perfect life.

Yesterday I had two incall customers in the day time. One was called Luke and he was quite nice. He said he worked in a pub and he said that he hadn’t had sex for three months. I am not sure if that was true or not but he paid for two hours and had sex with me four times. I don’t think he had taken Viagra either because his face wasn’t red and he wasn’t sniffing.

The second customer was called Jean and he was from France. He was quite young and said he was a lawyer and that he lived in Paris. He had booked me for two hours as well and asked me if I had any cocaine and I said I could get some so I called Vince and he brought some around to the flat.

In the evening Simon booked me for four hours and he came around with Kentucky Fried Chicken, the big party bucket, and French fries and corn and coleslaw and I opened a bottle of champagne. He had four DVDs with him and we watched Shooter which was about a sniper but I didn’t really understand the plot. But there was lots of action so that didn’t matter. Then we went to the bedroom and I made love to him. I wish that I had more feeling with Simon but he is so small that there is no feeling at all and I am always worried that the condom will come off. That is the funny thing about condoms. In the shops they only sell one size but men are actually all different sizes. Do you know, I have seen hundreds of men naked and I there is a lot of difference between the biggest and the smallest but there is only one size of condom. I suppose that if they did make them in different sizes the men who needed the small size would be too shy to buy them.

Simon left at one o’clock in the morning and I thought I would be finished for the night but at two o’clock Oliver phoned and said that I had an incall booking for ninety minutes at half past two. I was so tied that I just wanted to sleep and then I remembered that Jean had left behind a little bit of cocaine. He had used most of it but there was some left and he had forgotten to take it with him. I had actually thrown it away but I got it out of the bin and sniffed it. It was the first time I had ever sniffed cocaine and it was a totally different from licking it. It is difficult to explain how it felt but it stopped me from feeling sleepy. I felt like I had a lot of energy and at one point the customer said I was making love to him so hard that I was hurting him. I thought that was funny and I laughed a lot and he said that I was crazy. His name was Eddie and he said that he had been arguing with his wife because she had been unfaithful so he had slept with me to make her feel bad. His wife had left home and was living with another man, he said, so really I am not sure that he is sleeping with a working girl. I felt a bit sorry for him and I gave him my phone number and said that I hoped he would come to see me again. After Eddie had gone I tried to sleep but I couldn’t because my heart was beating so fast so I lay on the sofa and watched DVDs all night.

Lucky Belinda

2007-10-18T10:12:00.000-07:00

Sandra phoned me yesterday to say that she was really angry with Belinda. Belinda still hadn’t paid her the money she owed her and now Belinda has stopped answering the phone when she calls. I wanted to tell Sandra that I understood how she felt because Sandra still hasn’t paid back the money that she owes me but I didn’t. Sandra said she wanted to go around to Belinda’s flat and talk to her and wanted me to go with her but I lied and said that I had a headache because I didn’t want to get involved. Sandra kept asking me and said that Alice and Rachel were going with her and then I definitely didn’t want to go because I know that Alice and Belinda really hate each other and there will be trouble if they get together again.

A bit later Belinda phoned me and asked me if she could come and talk to me and I said okay because actually I want to talk to her about working as an independent. I am still very unhappy with Oliver about what happened at the house in St John’s Wood. Oliver is supposed to take care of me and he didn’t at the St John’s Wood house. He let the Russians do what they wanted and he didn’t care. I don’t see why I should give one third of everything I earn to Oliver if he doesn’t take care of me.

Belinda came around just before mid-day and she brought a whole watermelon for me which was really nice because she had remembered how much I like to eat it. I cut it in half and we ate half each, using spoons. That is the way I like to eat watermelon. It is much tastier than eating slices.

Belinda had some big news for me. She said that she was stopping work as an escort. The rich American customer who gave her the Rolex watch wanted to take care of her and he had said that he would get a visa for her to go to America and get her an apartment in New York and that he would be her mistress which is like being a Mia Noi. Belinda said the customer’s name was Christopher and he had a good heart and a lot of money. Christopher had told her that one day he would leave his wife but that even if he didn’t he would buy her the apartment and pay her a hundred thousand dollars a year and buy her anything she wanted. Belinda laughed and said that Christopher really loved her. I asked her if she loved him and she said he had a good heart and he was rich and that was all that mattered. I asked her what would happen if she went to America and then Christopher changed his mind and Belinda said that would never happen because she had used the magic perfume on him which meant that he would always want her., not matter what happened. She said that he was hers now until the day that he died, that whenever he thought about her he would want to have sex with her. She said that if I wanted I could buy some of the perfume from her but actually I am not sure if I believe her. I think Robert and Simon both love me but it has nothing to do with magic. I think that maybe some men who use working girls find it too easy to lose their hearts. I think that is dangerous because some girls will take advantage of weak men. Actually that is what I think Belinda is doing. I think she is taking advantage of Christopher.

I asked her if she was going to pay back Sandra the money for her contract and she said that maybe she would but she didn’t have the cash just then. She said Christopher was giving her some money but not enough to pay all the money that she owed Sandra. Belinda said that really it wasn’t fair that she had to pay Sandra so much money. Sandra had only paid £6,000 for the contract but Belinda was supposed to pay her back £18,000, which means a £12,000 profit for Sandra which is a lot of money. I didn’t say anything because it isn’t my business but I do think that a deal is a deal and Belinda had a deal with Sandra so really she should pay her back.

Belinda said that the reason that she wanted to talk to me was to ask me if I wanted to take over her website. Actually she wanted me to buy it. She said I could put my pictures on the website and that I could start working as an independent. She said I would make a lot more money than when I worked for the agency. I said I would think about it and actually I will because I think that maybe Oliver doesn’t really care about the girls who work for him, I think he only cares about himself and about money. I used to think that Cat was my friend too but now I think that she is not really my friend. Belinda said that if gave her £1,000 I could have her website and the mobile phone number. I think I will talk to Robert and ask him if he thinks it is a good idea. If I see Robert for four hours outcall he pays me £690 and I have to give £230 to Oliver. If I was an independent then I would keep all the £690. I am sure that Robert would be my customer if I was an independent. So would Simon and Simon comes to see me at least twice a week and stays for three hours each time.

Belinda asked me if I had read about the Lithuanian gang who had been sent to prison for trafficking girls and I said yes, we had talked about it on Sunday and she asked me if I knew that they were friends of Oliver’s and that was a surprise. I said I didn’t know that and she said that she had been told it from a girl who worked for another agency. She said that a lot of working girls met at a Thai nightclub in Trafalgar Square called Thai Square and that she went there every Friday night. She said that I should go because it was useful to talk to girls who worked for other agencies. She said that she met a girl who knew Oliver and she told Belinda that actually Oliver isn’t Russian he is Lithuanian. And the men who were sent to prison were friends of his. I asked Belinda how you could tell the difference between a Russian and a Lithuanian and she said that she didn’t know but that Oliver was a Lithuanian and that I should be careful of him because he was a dangerous man. I am not sure if that is true. Oliver has always been very kind to me. Sometimes I think that Belinda does not always tell the truth. Anyway, we ate the watermelon and we watched some Thai soap operas that I had brought from a DVD shop in Chinatown.

Then Oliver phoned me to say that I had a booking and Belinda had to go. The booking was for an outcall at the Hyatt Churchill Hotel where an American businessman had booked me for two hours. He wanted anal but I said that I didn’t do anal. He made love very roughly so I am glad that I did not do anal because I am sure it would have hurt me.

In the evening Richard came to see me again for an hour’s incall but he only stayed forty minutes. Richard is the customer who tells his wife that he is out running but really he is in my flat having sex with me. He came in his tracksuit and running shoes and said that he had taken a taxi to my flat because it was quicker. I think it is more fun exercising with me than running around the streets. Actually, he is not having exercise, he is having sexercise!

My last customer was Vince and he came at just before midnight and booked me for two hours. I like Vince now. He us a customer but I think he is a real friend. I told him that the money I had given him had arrived in my bank in Udon Thani and he said of course, transferring money from bank to bank was easy. He said he could send more money for me so I gave him £5,000 and he said he would do it next week. Actually he saw where I kept my money but I trust him so I think that is okay. He took cocaine while he was in my flat and asked me if I wanted some but I said no, I didn’t like taking drugs and he said that was okay but that there was nothing wrong with cocaine so long as you didn’t get addicted to it. I am not sure if that is true because if drugs were okay I don’t think they would be illegal.

Peter

2007-10-16T08:20:00.000-07:00

Today I am so happy, more happy than I have been in a long time. Last night Peter booked me. He is in London for two days on business and tomorrow he will go back to Hong Kong. He had a suite in the Mandarin Oriental and again he took me to dinner. But this time we didn’t have dinner in the hotel, he took me out to the Blue Elephant Restaurant in Fulham. I have never been there to eat before but I have eaten their food because sometimes Oliver and Cat bring food from there to the flat in Sloane Square. The restaurant is quite beautiful, much prettier than the restaurant where I worked in Camden. There are plants everywhere and a bridge over a stream. Most of the waitresses were students and lots of them were pretty and I think they would do very well at my job if they wanted to work as escorts.
The food was good too. It wasn’t as good as food in Thailand because they make the food the way that farangs like it so it is not too spicy, but we had a lovely meal.

We had chicken masaman curry and steamed sea bass in a soy sauce and Pad Thai and seafood salad that was really delicious. Peter could see that I wasn’t very happy even though I tried to smile a lot and he kept asking me what was wrong. I didn’t want to tell him because it was my problem and not his and he was paying to have a good time not to hear me complain about my life but he kept asking me so eventually I told him. I told him everything. I told him about sending the two million baht to Kung and how Kung had tricked me into doing this job and how now he wanted more money before he would give me the house.

Peter listened and then he said he would help me. He goes to Thailand a lot and does business there and he knows a lot of important people. If you want to do anything in Thailand you have to know the right people. If you are poor you can do nothing but if you are rich then you know the right people and you can do anything.

Peter said that he would talk to some people that he knows in Thailand and they will make sure everything is okay. I gave him Kung’s name and his address and the address of the house. I do not know if Peter will make a big problem for Kung but I don’t care any more because Kung is a liar and he is trying to steal my money.

Once Peter said he would help me I was much happier. After dinner we went back to Peter’s room and we made love three times during the night. Peter is a very gentle lover and very considerate. I think his wife is a very lucky woman. In a way it is a pity that he is married because I would like to be his wife.

When I got home I phoned Daeng and had a long talk with him. He kept asking me when I would be going back to Udon Thani and I said not long but that isn’t true because I don’t want to go back until I have enough money to take care of myself. I miss Daeng more than anything but money is very important right now. I need a house and a car and I need to be able to take care of my mother and father and I need to pay for a good school for Daeng and one day he will have to go to university and I will have to pay for that. Then I spoke to my mother and I got more good news. The money that I gave to Vince had arrived in my bank account. I was starting to worry that maybe Vince was cheating me but he wasn’t, he did what he said he would. I sent him a text message thanking him for sending my money and he sent me a message back saying ‘No Problem’. I am so lucky that he is my customer.

The Gang

2007-10-15T04:52:00.000-07:00

Cat phoned me during the day and said that I should take my passport and Thai ID card to the flat in Sloane Square. I asked why and she said that it was because she and Oliver knew somebody who could get all our visas extended, which is good news.

I went to Sloane Square with Nancy and Sandra. Nancy had her passport and ID card and she was really excited because she had overstayed but Cat said that wouldn’t be a problem and they could get that sorted out for her. Sandra didn’t have her passport because she had posted it back to Thailand when her visa had expired. A lot of girls do that if they overstay. They send their passports back to Thailand in case they get caught by immigration in England. If they get caught they give a false name and they get sent home but nobody knows who they really are. Cat had told her to bring her ID card anyway.

England is a bit stupid about people who overstay. In Thailand the police put people who overstay in prison and fine them and make them pay for their own ticket out of the country. If they do not pay they stay in prison for ever. But in England they do not put people in prison for overstaying, they just give them a ticket to go. I think that is crazy, actually.

Candy had bought a copy of a local newspaper which talked about a gang being sent to prison for bringing prostitutes into London and we all read it and talked about it. There was a gang who were bringing in prostitutes and making them work in brothels in Paddington and Lancaster Gate which means that they were working near to my flat. The men in the gang were from Lithuania and their photographs were in the paper. Lithuania is in Europe but I think it used to be part of Russia. The men all looked quite normal, actually, even though they were criminals. Two of them weren’t Lithuanian, they were from China I think because they had Chinese names, Hui and Huang. The paper said that the police found drugs worth £100,000 in one of the flats of the gang. I think that drugs and working girls often go together. The paper said that the men were all arrested last year which was a long time before I started working for the agency. You know, it was quite funny because the police didn’t arrest all the men and they were looking for one man and they caught him because he went to the court to watch the trial of his friends. Sometimes people can be so stupid, I think.

I feel very sorry for the girls that were forced to work in the brothels. That is the good thing about Oliver’s agency. No one forces us to do this job. We all do it because we want to do it. We do it by choice. But the gang did not give the girls any choice. I am happy that they went to prison. The newspaper did not say what happened to the girls. I hope they were allowed to stay in England. It would not be fair if they were sent home, too.

This week I had £1,300 for Oliver because I didn’t have as many customers this week. Oliver said it was because there was a lot of sport on television, football and rugby, so a lot of men were staying in. I think it was because we all had to go to the party in St John’s Wood. Rachel was the best-earning girl with £1,750 and Alice was just behind with £1,6000. Laura had £1,550 and Sandra had £1,600 and Nancy had £1,200. Nancy and Sandra didn’t talk about paying me back any of the money that they owed me, which I don’t think is fair. Candy had £1,250 and Vicky had £1,400 and Wanda had £1,350.

When he took the money, Oliver gave everybody £300 back and said that was the fee for the party at St John’s Wood. I took the money but I didn’t say thank you or anything. I am fairly sure that Oliver put something in my drink at the party, and he knows that the Russian made love to me without a condom and he doesn’t care. And I think he saw them forcing me to have anal, but I am not sure if that is a dream or not.

Laura was laughing a lot and saying that she wanted to go to another party like that because it was fun. I think she is a bit crazy. She has changed a lot and isn’t like the girl I used to know. Before she was sweet and a bit shy but now I think she is just crazy. She lost a lot of money playing cards, too. More than £1,000. I lost £600 because I found it hard to concentrate.

The Party

2007-10-14T11:04:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was the party in St John’s Wood and I didn’t get up until very late today. I feel a bit sick and I have a bad headache and I am aching and sore all over. What happened at the party was not good.

Oliver said we were all to meet first at the Sloane Square flat and that we should dress very sexily, the way that we dress for the photographs on the website. I wore my tight black dress and my thigh-length boots, though obviously I had my Kenzo coat on when I went outside. I went to Sloane Square with Nancy in a taxi and Alice and Rachel were already there. Cat had made some Khao Pad for us and we ate it. Oliver said it was very important that everyone at the party was happy. Alice asked when we would get paid and Oliver said that he would sort out the money on Sunday. Rachel wanted to know what we were supposed to do at the party but all Oliver said was that we should make sure that everyone was happy. That’s all that he would say. When all the girls arrived Oliver said that we should go.

I went to St John’s Wood in a taxi with Oliver, Nancy, Sandra, and Laura. Oliver looked a bit nervous and I could tell that he was worried. I had never seen him like that before. Normally he always looks confident but not yesterday. The house we went to was really big, bigger even than the house that Khun Thaksin had bought. There was a big wall around it and huge iron gates and through the gates we could see lots of cars. There was a red Ferrarri and two Porches and a Range Rover and three BMWs. Oliver had to press a bell and he looked up at a CCTC camera and then the gate opened and we walked in. As we got to the front door the second taxi arrived with Cat, Alice, Rachel, Wanda and Candy so we all went into the house together. There were two men who looked like bodyguards at the front door and Nancy whispered in Thai that she had seen a gun but I didn’t see a gun so she might have imagined it.

A big Russian man in a black suit came to say hello to Oliver and hugged him. Oliver said the man was called Nikolai and it was his birthday. Nikolai was fat with his head shaved like a monk and a scar on one of his cheeks. He had really cold blue eyes and he didn’t smile. He looked at us like he was a farmer and we were his cows. He said something to Oliver in Russian and Oliver told us to take off our coats. Cat took our coats and Nikolai looked at us and nodded and then pointed to the main room and we all went through. As we went in I saw Oliver give Nikolai a thick envelope which looked like it had a lot of money in it. Nikolai just grunted and put the envelope in his jacket pocket.

There were about forty people in the room, I think. The men were all big and wearing expensive suits and gold chains and they were drinking brandy and whisky and smoking big cigars and shouting at each other in Russian. The women were all tall and pretty and had big breasts and long, long legs. There were blondes and brunettes and redheads and they were all young and pretty and wearing really nice dresses. They were dressed sexily, but not like we were dressed. We Thai girls were dressed like working girls. We were sexy but not sexy like the Russian girls, and I felt a bit shy. Everyone in the room turned to look at us and I know that if I had been there on my own I would have been a bit scared. Some customers look at me like I am a human being, someone they want to talk to and get to know. Customers like Peter and Robert and Simon make me feel good about myself. But some customers look at me like I am an animal, something to be used. I am serious when I say that everyone in the room, the men and the girls, were looking at us as if we were animals. One of the men said something in Russian and they all laughed. I looked at Oliver and he was smiling but I could see that he was a bit nervous.

There was loud music playing on a stereo and there were bottles of spirits everywhere and there were silver bowls with white powder that I knew must be cocaine. But I have never seen so much cocaine in my life. It was like piles of sugar. One of the Russian women was kneeling by a coffee table using a rolled-up fifty pound note to sniff up cocaine. Laura knelt down next to her and the girl gave her the note and Laura sniffed up a lot of cocaine. I mean a lot of cocaine.

Then the girl smiled and she kissed Laura on the lips and I could see that Laura was kissing her back. Oliver said that we should go and talk to the people and do whatever they wanted. I am not sure what he meant but I know that we were working so I smiled and me and Nancy walked over to two men who standing by a huge plasma TV, the biggest I have ever seen. It was showing a sexy movie of two blonde girls making love to a man with a very long dick. Nancy laughed and said that if a man with a dick like that made love to her it would bang her chin and we both laughed.

The two men said that their names were Viktor and Alexei. They were both quite young, maybe twenty-five, Viktor was wearing an Armani suit and he had a big gold ring with a gold coin in it. He was quite good-looking but like Nikolai he had very hard eyes. He said something to Alexei and they both laughed. Viktor pointed at his groin and said ‘Blow Job’. Then he pointed at me. Alexei did the same to Nancy. I couldn’t believe it. They wanted oral sex while they were in the room with everyone else. I looked around and Laura was lying on a sofa with the girl who had been sniffing cocaine. The girl was taking off Laura’s dress and three men were standing around them, laughing and pointing at them. Alice was kissing a man while Rachel was giving him a blow job and Candy was sitting on the arm of a chair and kissing a man and stroking his leg.

Nancy said we might as well do it because we were there to work so we both knelt down and gave them oral sex. While I was giving Viktor oral a blonde girl came over and she stroked my hair and talked to Viktor. He came in my mouth and then he said he wanted to go upstairs with me and the girl. The girl picked up a bottle of champagne and we went up a big staircase. There were so many bedrooms, more than twelve I am sure. One of the bedroom doors was open and I saw Rachel on top of a man, naked, drinking from a bottle while she made love to him. Two Russian girls were watching Rachel make love and touching themselves and shouting things at her in Russian.

Viktor and the girl took me into a another bedroom. Viktor sat on a chair and sniffed some cocaine while the girl started kissing me and undressing me, then she took off her dress and lay on the bed with me. She had a really good body and her skin was so soft and I actually quite enjoyed her stroking and kissing me. Then the girl got off the bed and Viktor told me to give him oral which I did and then the girl was back but this time she had a dildo strapped to her so it was as if she had a dick. I had never seen anything like that before, not even in a movie. She told me to get on my knees and she made love to me, doggy-style. It was a strange feeling because it felt like a man inside me but it was her. Viktor made me give him oral while she made love to me from behind and you know what, I actually came it felt so good. Then Viktor took off all his clothes and he got on top of me and tried to make love to me and I told him that he had to wear a condom. He said he never wore a condom and he tried to force me but I am quite strong so I pushed him off but then the girl held my arms and shouted at me that I was a whore and I had to do what they wanted and I said that I wasn’t a whore but Viktor put his hand over his mouth and then he was inside me and he pushed hard so that it hurt and he kept pounding into me until he came. I wanted to cry. No customer has ever done that to me before.

Viktor laughed and rolled off me and I ran into the bathroom to wash out his sperm. I don’t want to get sick and I don’t want to have a baby. If I am sick or if I get pregnant I cannot work. I spent a lot of time washing myself and when I came out of the bathroom Viktor and the girl had gone so I got dressed.

Alice was in the hallway giving oral sex to a very old man with grey hair. She was naked. She laughed when she saw me and asked me if I was having a good time but I couldn’t say anything.

I went downstairs and saw Oliver talking to Nikolai. Nikolai said something to Oliver and Oliver waved me over. Oliver said that Nikolai said that I wasn’t smiling and wanted to know what was wrong with me. I told Oliver that the man upstairs had had sex with me without a condom and Oliver asked me if that was a problem. I was so surprised. Of course it is a problem, I said. I never have sex without a condom. Oliver said that it was okay, that all the men there were healthy and no one had Aids. He said something to a girl with long red hair and she went away. Oliver said that I had to relax, that these were his friends and he had to make a good impression. I felt like I wanted to cry because Oliver is my boss and he should understand how I feel. Nikolai said something to Oliver in Russian and Oliver replied in Russian. Oliver said to me that Nikolai wanted a blow job. I said okay and thought that we would go upstairs but Nikolai unzipped his trousers. He had a very ugly dick, the skin was very dark and it was covered in white spots. It looked horrible. I told Oliver that I wanted to use a condom and he glared at me and said no, I had to give him oral without a condom. Then the girl came back with a glass and Oliver took it and gave it to me and told me to drink it. I said I didn’t to drink alcohol but Oliver said that I had to, it would relax me. I had no choice, I had to drink it. I don’t know what it was. Vodka, maybe. With tonic water. Oliver made me drink it all and I was almost sick. Then Cat came over and said in Thai that I had to do whatever Nikolai wanted, that he was a very important man and that if I upset him it would make the agency look bad and give Oliver a big problem. I felt a bit dizzy and I couldn’t argue any more so I knelt down and gave him a blow job until he came in my mouth.

When he had come he just zipped his trousers and walked away with Oliver. I stayed where I was, kneeling on the floor and feeling a bit sick, then two men picked me up. I remember giggling a bit because I couldn’t walk. My legs felt very heavy and they carried me upstairs.

I don’t remember much after that. I remember bits but I’m not sure if it really happened or if it was a dream. I think I was lying on a bed looking up at a big chandelier and there was a man on top of me who was making love to me and another man who was kneeling next to me and telling me to suck him. I think I did suck him and then I was picked up and turned over so that I was face down on the bed and they lifted me up and pushed a pillow under me so that my bottom was in the air. One of the men got on top of me and pushed my legs apart and tried to push himself into my bum but I said that I didn’t do anal then the other man grabbed my wrists and said something to me in Russian. I didn’t understand what he said but he was angry and then he spat in my face. Then I think the door opened and Oliver was there, looking at what they were doing to me and I think that I begged him to help me but he didn’t say anything and he didn’t do anything and then he closed the door. The two Russians were laughing and that is the last thing I really remember until I woke up in my own bed. I was so sore and there were red marks everywhere like I’d been bitten and my pussy hurts and my bum is sore. I lay down in a hot bath and tried to remember what had happened but I really can’t remember anything else.

I phoned Nancy but her phone was turned off and I phoned Sandra but she didn’t answer her phone. Then I phoned Laura and she answered and seemed really happy. She said that she had had a great time and that one of the men had tipped her £1,000. I think Laura is a bit crazy. I think she likes sex and drugs too much. I asked her if anyone had forced her to do anything she didn’t want to and she just laughed and said that it had been fun. She asked me if I was okay and I lied and said that I was.

I think Oliver did a bad thing making us go to the party. I think he should have taken care of us. But I don’t know what I can do. I have to work because I need money to pay Kung so I have to keep working for him. I can carry on doing this job but today I am sad, sad, sad, and I never want to go to the house in St John’s Wood ever again.

Liar!

2007-10-12T02:26:00.003-07:00

I hate Kung. I hate him and wish that he was dead, dead, dead. I can’t believe what he has done. He has lied to me, lied to me more than any other person has ever lied to me. I phoned him to check that the two million baht had gone into his account and he said that it had but that he wanted more before he would sign the house over to him. I was so shocked that I couldn’t speak. He said that if we were together the house would be his, and because I didn’t want him any more that meant he was losing the whole house so it was only fair that he paid me for the whole house. That meant he wanted another one million baht. That is not fair and he knows it’s not fair. I paid for more than half the house and I paid for all the work that the builders inside the house.

I didn’t know what to say to him. I wanted to tell him that I knew that he had sent me to London so that I would work as an escort, and I wanted to tell him that I knew that he didn’t love me and that he only cared about my money. But I didn’t say anything. I was too upset. I don’t know what to do because he has already lied to me and if I send him another one million baht how do I know that he won’t lie to me again? I am so angry because I don’t think he will give me the two million baht back if I ask for it. I feel so stupid. I should never have trusted him.

I phoned my mum and told her what Kung had done and she said why didn’t I just carry on being his Mia Noi the same as before, that he was a good man and I should take care of him. Then she told me that the £4,000 I had sent had arrived, which was good news. Then she said that she had already changed the pounds into Thai baht but had spent a lot of it. I asked her what she had spent it on and she said that she had to go tamboon at the wat. The wat is the temple and to go tamboon means to make merit and she had give the monks thirty thousand baht which is more than £400. And she said that one of her friends needed money because her daughter was in hospital so she had leant her forty thousand baht. And the airconditioner in her bedroom wasn’t working so she had bought a new one and that had cost thirty-five thousand baht. She said that my father wanted a new motorcycle too and that was going to cost twenty-five thousand baht. I started to cry because this wasn’t fair. Everybody is taking money from me. I have to work so hard to make my money and I don’t think they understand just how hard I work. My mother has spent about half the money I sent.

That is not fair because it wasn’t her money it was my money. I didn’t tell her how upset I was and I don’t think she realises that she has done something wrong. In a way I think my mother is a bit like Kung. She cares more about my money than she does about me.

I don’t know what has happened to the money that I gave Vince to send to Thailand. I phoned Vince but his number wasn’t working. I hope he hasn’t stolen my money.

Even though I was very unhappy I still had to work. I had four customers yesterday. The first customer was Matt, the man with his name tattooed in Thai on his arm and the tattoo of a Buddha’s head. He said that he had just got back from Thailand and that he had had sex with twenty girls in two weeks. He had been in Pattaya most of the time and he said all the girls in Pattaya liked sex. I think he believes that girls like having sex with him but in fact they are only doing it for money. I don’t think any girl would enjoy having sex with Matt. He is rude and ugly and he doesn’t smell good. He kept trying to talk to me in really bad Thai but I said that I didn’t speak Thai. When he left he asked me for my phone number again and I said no. After he left I phoned Oliver and said that I didn’t want to see Matt again. I said he was a bad customer but I didn’t say why.

The second customer was called Russ and he was a nice man, quite sweet actually. He was about fifty years old and very polite and kept saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. He didn’t want sex, just oral, and he wanted me to use a condom even though I would have done it without one.

After Russ had gone I didn’t have a customer for three hours and I just lay on my sofa and cried because I was so sad. Then Oliver phoned and said that I had an outcall job at the Savoy Hotel so I had to get dressed up and put on my make up. The job was for two hours and the customer was Japanese. He was my first ever Japanese customer and he was okay, though he didn’t smile at me, not once. He was quite rough with me and kept saying things in Japanese which I don’t think were very nice, though I am not sure because I do not speak Japanese. He didn’t speak Thai so we had to talk in English and really his English wasn’t very good. He made love to me in lots of positions some of which actually hurt me and then he wanted to come in my mouth which was okay. He didn’t tip me or anything, he just pointed at the door when it was time for me to go.

On the way back to Bayswater Oliver phoned to say that I had a booking for midnight. It was a new customer called David and he wanted me to wear my nurse’s uniform. David was younger than me, I think, and quite handsome. He had a good body but he didn’t want sex with me, he just wanted to lie on the bed while I stroked him. He said that when he was small he was in hospital for a long time and he almost died and that now that he was older he liked to pretend that nurses were touching him. I felt a bit sad for him. He said that he didn’t have a girlfriend and I gave him my phone number.

After he went I lay on the sofa and cried. I wanted to talk to somebody about my problem but there was no one I could talk to. I felt so alone. I missed Daeng and I wanted to hear his voice but I didn’t want him to know how upset I was so I didn’t talk to him. I miss my son and I wish that I was in Thailand with him now but first I have to sort out my problem. I feel so alone. After midnight I started getting text messages from customers saying good night. I didn’t send any replies. I was too sad. Then Robert sent me a message saying he missed me. I don’t know what to say to Robert. He lent me all that money and now I think I have wasted it. I feel shy and I don’t think I can tell him what I have done. I did send him a text message , though, calling him Daddy and saying that I missed him.

Wanda

2007-10-11T07:26:00.001-07:00

Yesterday a customer booked me and Nancy together for two hours incall in the afternoon. I went around to Nancy’s apartment and we changed into sexy dresses and high heels and put on sexy makeup. His name was Alex and he was about fifty years old and wearing a suit. I think he had taken Viagra because he was red faced and he kept sniffing and he made love to me three times and four times with Nancy. He kept changing from me to her which meant that we had to use lots of condoms. Then after he came he asked if we would do a lesbian show for him so we did. Then we gave him a massage and he was still hard and he said that he wanted to do anal and I said that I wouldn’t. Nancy said that she wouldn’t either but then Alex said that he would pay an extra £50 so Nancy said that she would. After he had gone away Nancy said that actually anal was quite nice and she didn’t mind doing it with her boyfriend but she always made customers pay extra for it. I don’t think she tells Oliver that she is getting extra money from customers but that is not my business.

I was glad that Chris was not in the flat because I am still angry at him for coming around to my flat and he still sends me texts saying that he wants me to be his girlfriend. I think he is crazy because Nancy really likes him a lot and gives him FFF and money too.

Then I remembered that this was the time of the month that Nancy had her period and I asked her how she could work and she said that her period hadn’t come yet. She laughed and said that she hoped she wasn’t pregnant but I don’t think it is anything to laugh at. If she is pregnant she can not work. She said that maybe the famous customer had made her pregnant so she would get money from him for the rest of her life. Actually I think that sometimes Nancy is a bit crazy.

I told her about talking with the Pee with Cat at Wanda’s flat and she said that we should buy Julie something to make her happy. If you gave a present to a ghost then it would not be so angry. It sounded like a good idea so we went shopping. Nancy bought some chocolates because all young girls like chocolates and I looked for a doll so that she would have something to play with. Do you know what I found? I found a doll called Julie. It was in a box with pretty clothes and a toy dog so I bought it because I thought that Julie would be happy to have a doll that had her name.

Nancy and I went to Wanda’s apartment and we gave the presents to her and she put them on top of her wardrobe where she keeps her Buddha figure and her candles. She said it was a very good idea to give Julie presents. I asked her if she thought that Julie was happy or not and Wanda said she thought that she wasn’t because sometimes the room felt cold even when it was warm and sometimes Wanda felt sad even though nothing was wrong. She said that she wanted Cat to come back some time to talk to Julie again and Nancy said she would come because she wanted to ask Julie for numbers to play the English lottery because with the English lottery you can win millions of pounds which is a lot more than you can win in Thailand.

Wanda cooked some Phad Thai for us and we ate it in the kitchen. Wanda told us about her life before she came to London. She was born in Buri Ram and has a five-year-old daughter who lives with her mother. Her husband was a bus driver but he left her when her son was born and she discovered that he had three different wives all over Thailand. Wanda had a job in a factory but the work was very hard so she went to be a working girl in Singapore. A friend told her how to do it and she said it was easy money. Thai people need visas to go to most countries, but not to Singapore. Thai people can get a two week visa on arrival and sometimes a month. So Wanda went to Singapore with her friend who was quite pretty and they shared a room in a hotel and in the evenings they went to a building called Orchard Towers. Wanda said that farangs called it the ‘Four Floors of Horse’ which I didn’t understand but then she spelled it out for me and I realised that she meant ‘Four Floors of Whores.’ Her English isn’t very good, actually. In the building there are lots of bars and Thai girls can find customers there. There are a lot of ladyboys working there too, and Filipina girls too. Wanda said a farang will pay 300 singapore dollars to go with a girl which is about £100 and so it is almost as much as we get working in London. Wanda said that she could get two or three customers a night which was really good money. She had to leave every two weeks but the ticket to Singapore only cost about 10,000 baht and the room she stayed in was quite cheap. Just working for two weeks she could save about 100,000 baht. She would work for two weeks and then fly back to Thailand for two weeks.

She did that for six months but she wanted to earn more money so that she could build her own house in Buri Ram so she used the money she had saved to buy a contract to get a visa to work in London. Now she has already built her house. Now she is saving her money so that she can set up a restaurant in Buri Ram and when she has enough she will stop doing this job and go back to Thailand.

Wanda is very sensible. She says she will never have a boyfriend until she is back in Thailand and she never takes drugs. She is also careful when she plays cards at the Sloane Square flat. She says you have to be very careful with your money in this job. It is easy to earn it, but it is easy to lose it, too. Wanda talks a lot of sense. She is more sensible than Nancy who is wasting all her money on her boyfriend.

Then Oliver phoned me to say that Robert had booked me for four hours so I had to go home to change into my school uniform. As I was leaving the apartment, Simon phoned me to say that he had tried to book me but the agency had said that I was busy. I said that was true and he asked me if I would cancel my customer so that he could see me but I said that I was sorry but that was impossible. I have to go with the customer who books me first. Simon complained and said that he wanted to be my boyfriend and not my customer and I said that I was sorry but I had to go. I don’t like it when he says he wants to be my boyfriend. He is my customer and that is the end of it.

Pee

2007-10-10T10:15:00.001-07:00

I phoned my mother about the money I posted her and she said that it hadn’t arrived yet. I am starting to think that perhaps I was a bit crazy to post £4,000 to Thailand. My mum has an ATM card for my Kasikorn Bank account so that she can take out money and I asked her to check my bank account and that I would call her back. When I did call her back she said that the money that Robert had sent had arrived. He had sent £35,000 and in Thai baht that came to just over two million baht. My mother wanted to know how I had got so much money but I just said that a friend had lent it to me. The money that Vince was sending hadn’t arrived yet. My mum asked me what I was going to do with so much money and I said that I was going to give it to Kung so that the house would be mine. Then she started to ask about Kung and when he was going to leave his wife and I said I didn’t want to talk about that.

I wrote a letter to the bank manager asking him to transfer the two million baht to Kung’s account and then I went to a shop in Edgware Road where they have a fax machine and I paid them to send the fax to my bank. I was so happy because now the house will be mine and I do not have to share it with anyone.

When I got home I sent Robert a text message saying that the money had arrived in Thailand and thanking him and telling him that I missed him. He sent me a message back saying ‘You’re welcome’ and that he missed me, too.

In the afternoon Cat phoned me and said she was going to Wanda’s apartment in Queensway with Sandra and Alice and Rachel and she asked me if I would go, too. I said I would because I was not too busy but Oliver had phoned me to say that I had a three-hour outcall booking at the Four Seasons Hotel at eight o’clock.

I walked around to Wanda’s apartment. It was in quite a nice building and it had CCTV which is important. There was no lift and her apartment was on the third floor and that’s not so good because customers don’t like to climb stairs. Actually, a lot of girls like basement flats because they have their entrance and customers just have to walk down a few stairs to the door. That way no one can see them come and go. Some customers are shy, you see. Especially the ones who are married.

Cat was already there with Sandra and Wanda and Wanda made coffee for us and then Alice and Rachel arrived. Alice said she couldn’t stay long because a regular customer had booked her for four hours outcall so Cat said we should get started right away. Wanda cleared everything off her glass coffee table and Cat wrote down letters on pieces of paper. She wrote down the English alphabet and the numbers one to ten and Wanda asked her why she wasn’t using the Thai alphabet and Cat said it was because if there was a Pee in the apartment it would be a farang Pee and not a Thai Pee and a farang Pee would not understand the Thai alphabet.

Cat also wrote down ‘YES’ and ‘NO’ and ‘DON’T KNOW’ then she put those pieces of paper in the middle and surrounded them with the twenty-six letters of the alphabet. In fact I think it is better to use the English alphabet because the Thai alphabet has 44 letters and more than twenty vowels. Cat told Wanda to light candles and close the curtains and she did and we sat around the table and Cat put a glass on the table upside down and said we should all touch it with the fingers of our left hands. Actually I have done this before in Thailand with my friends when we were at school and I always think that somebody is pushing the glass and that really it is just for fun and not for talking to Pee but Cat was very serious.

Cat said the Lord’s Prayer which us the prayer that Christians say, and then she asked if any spirits were there. She spoke in English, of course. Then the glass slid towards ‘YES’, quite slowly. Cat asked for the name of the Pee and the glass spelled out ‘J-U-L-I-E’. It was a bit scary actually because I don’t think anyone was pushing the glass. Julie is a girl’s name. Cat asked Julie how old she was and the glass went to the number 10 and then the number 2 and when Cat asked if that meant that Julie was 12 the glass moved to ‘YES’. Cat asked Julie where she was and the glass moved really quickly to ‘DON’T KNOW’ and then it slowly spelled out ‘D-A-R-K’ which was a bit scary. Wanda looked a bit worried but Alice and Rachel kept joking until Cat scolded them and told them to take it seriously or they would upset the Pee.

Then Cat asked the Pee if she had a message for anyone and the glass went to ‘YES’. Cat asked what the message was and the glass stopped for a minute or two as if it was thinking and then it slowly spelled out ‘D-A-N-G-R-E’ which didn't make sense and then Sandra said maybe it meant DANGER.

Cat asked who the message was for and the glass stayed still. She asked again and said ‘Please Julie tell us who the message is for’ and the glass started to move. It spelled out ‘E-V-R-Y-B-D-Y’ which I think means it was trying to spell EVERYBODY.

Then Wanda’s phone rang and made us all jump! It was Oliver phoning to say that she had an incall customer who was coming in fifteen minutes so we all had to go.

Actually I am glad that he phoned then because I did not like talking to Julie. I believe in Pee and I believe that sometimes Pee want to talk to people.

Ghost

2007-10-08T05:16:00.000-07:00

Sandra and Nancy came around to my flat before we went to Sloane Square. Sandra was really excited because Manchester City had beaten Middlesborough 3-1 and she had had a dream during the week that Manchester City would win 3-1 and so she had bet £500 and she had won a lot of money. She paid me back £1,000 of what she owes me which is good, but Nancy didn’t offer to pay me back any of the money that she owes me.

We went in a taxi to Sloane Square and this time I got out of the taxi first. It was quite funny because I knew that they wanted me to pay but I walked straight over to the door and rang the bell leaving them to sort out who should pay. Nancy had to pay and I could see that she was not happy.

This week I had £1,800 for Oliver, a bit less than last week. Alice was the best-earning girl because she had £2,250 and Rachel had £1,950. Sandra had £1,700 and Nancy had £1,200, do I think that Nancy should have paid me back some of the money that she owed me but she didn’t. Candy had £1,500 and Vicky had £1,600. Wanda was complaining that she wasn’t getting enough work and she only had £900 for Oliver.

She said that she thought there was a ghost in her apartment that was bringing her bad luck which sounds crazy but actually Thai people believe in ghosts. The ghost of my grandfather once gave my mother the winning numbers for the lottery and she won one thousand baht.

Laura had another really good week and she had £1,900 for Oliver and she gave me an envelope and said thank you to me for helping her. There was a thousand pounds in the envelope in fifty pound notes. Laura is a really good girl. She is lucky too because she won £800 playing cards. I lost £200 which is a lot less than I usually lose so I suppose that I was lucky too. Everybody else lost money. Except Oliver of course. He hardly ever loses.

Cat cooked Tom Yam Kung which is a hot and spicy prawn soup that was really delicious and Candy had brought some fruit, and Nancy had a bottle of brandy that a customer had given her. I didn’t drink any of the brandy but everyone else did and they got a bit drunk.

Wanda said she wanted to talk to the ghost to see what it wanted but she didn’t know how to talk to ghosts. In Thailand we call ghosts Pee. Cat said that she did, she had done it before, so she said that one day this week we would go to the flat and try to talk to the ghost. The more people that went the better, she said, because ghosts couldn’t do bad things if there were many people there. Alice said that ghosts didn’t always want to do bad things, sometimes they wanted to help and I said that was true and told them the story about my grandfather giving the lottery numbers to my mother.

Before we went home, Oliver said that there was something special that we had to do next Saturday. He had a friend who was a Russian who wanted to have a big birthday party at his house and all of us girls would have to go. We would have to go to a house in St Johns Wood and there would be other girls there and a lot of the Russian’s friends. Nancy asked how much we would charge and Oliver said that actually because the man was a friend of his he wouldn’t be paying and everyone said that wasn’t fair because we were working girls and we didn’t do sex for free. Oliver was a bit angry and said that we didn’t understand, the man was a friend so he couldn’t charge him but Alice and Rachel said that he had to pay because we would be working. Oliver said that okay, he would pay us. He would give us £300 each and we wouldn’t have to pay him any commission. The party would start at ten o’clock at night. Alice wanted to know when the party would finish and Oliver said that he didn’t know, but that it would be fun and there would be lots of food and drink and drugs and we would all have a good time. I don’t think that he understands that even when we are having a good time we are still working.

Candy

2007-10-07T08:49:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I worked with Candy for the first time. It doesn’t say on the website that I will work with Candy, but Oliver phoned me and asked me if I would do it because a customer wanted something special. He wanted domination with two girls and he had seen my picture and wanted me to do it with Candy. I said I didn’t want to be dominated but he said no, it would be me and Candy dominating him. He wanted to book us for two hours incall and because we would be doing domination he would be paying extra – he would pay us each £420, the same price as outcall. I said okay because actually I wanted to see what domination was like.

The customer had booked us for seven o’clock but Oliver said I should get to Candy’s apartment at six o’clock so that she could show me what to do. Candy has a two-bedroom apartment near to Paddington station in an old building but it has CCTV which is good. She pays £550 a week which is quite expensive but she said she needed two bedrooms because she does domination. She showed me the second bedroom and I was so surprised. For a start she had covered all the walls and the window with black plastic from garbage bags and there were red candles everywhere. There was no bed in the room but a sort of table covered with black leather and there was a cage made of black metal bars that was just big enough for a man and a thing made of wood that had holes for a man’s neck and his wrists with locks so that he couldn’t get out. Hanging on the walls were whips and paddles and straps that Candy said she used to hit the customer with, and lots of other things like little balls on strings and metal clamps and dildoes, some of them really big.

I asked her how she knew what to do to the customer and she said that when the customer first came she sat down with them and asked them everything that they liked to do and everything they didn’t like to do. The customer she was seeing was one she had seen before so she knew what to do.

She said that she always gave the customer what she calls a safe word. For this customer the safe word is ‘high heels’ though actually that is two words. If the customer says the safe word then we have to stop straight away. But if he says anything else like ‘stop’ or ‘no’ or if he screams, we carry on doing it because really he does not want us to stop. It sounds a bit crazy but Candy said it is very important because we don’t keep stopping just because we think we are hurting him too much. Unless he says the safe word, we are not hurting him too much.

Candy said most customers who want domination do not want sex, not even oral, but that they often made themselves come. Or sometimes they did not want to come at all. She showed me her outfits. She has a lot of domination outfits and masks and things, most of them made from plastic or leather. She gave me a very short leather skirt and a leather jacket with chains on it and high-heeled boots. She wore fishnet stockings and a leather bra and a leather g-string with chrome studs on it.

The customer’s name was Luke and it was very funny what we had to do to him. Candy told him to take his clothes off and kneel down and then she spat into a saucer and I did the same and then he licked it up like a dog. Then she made him lick our feet, but it wasn’t sexy like when Robert licks mu feet, it was like he was a dog. Then she started calling him all sorts of names, telling him he was no good, and then she whipped him with a leather whip.

Then we took him into the bathroom and she told him to lie down in the bath and then she told me to pee on him. Can you believe it? It was quite difficult to pee because I didn’t feel like it, but I managed. And do you know what? He drank some of my pee. I don’t know why anyone would want to do that but he did. We did a lot more things to him which I think were cruel and stupid, but afterwards when he was dressed he thanked us both and gave us both £50 tips so he must have been happy. Men can be so strange sometimes.

My house

2007-10-05T02:21:00.001-07:00

I thing Kung is a really bad person. My mother says it is wrong to hate anybody but Kung has been so bad that I am starting to hate him. On Wednesday evening he phoned me again and asked me to send him money so that he could buy the land behind the house. He said if I didn’t send it right away someone else might buy the land and build a factory next to our house and that would be terrible. He asked if I could send him 245,000 baht. He could only ask for all that money because he knows that I am selling my body in London. If he believed I was working in a restaurant then he would know that I can not earn so much.

I asked him if he really loved me and he said yes. Then I asked if he would leave his wife and live with me and Daeng and he said that was difficult because he did not want to hurt his family. I said that was not fair because he was hurting my family and he said that I had to understand him. Then he asked me to call him back because it was expensive to phone me from Thailand. Can you believe that? I called him back and this time I was angry but very cold. Jai Yen, we say in Thai. Cool heart. I said that I thought it might be better if I had the house myself. That way he wouldn’t have to come and live with me and Daeng and I could take care of myself.

I asked him how much I would have to pay him to have the house to myself, and do you know what he said? He said two million baht. I know that is not fair because the house is worth three million baht. I said that one and a half million baht would be fair and he said it wasn’t fair because he had been doing all the work, talking to the builders and the bank and organising everything. I thought he was wrong but I didn’t want to fight with him and I said I would send him two million baht. He said okay. I knew then for sure one thousand per cent that he didn’t love me and that all he cares about is my money. I felt like I wanted to cry because I had given him so much of my life. I was waiting for him to leave his wife but now I know that he never will.

Afterwards I phoned Robert. I asked him if he was serious about helping me and he said he was. He said he would book me for three hours and that we could talk about it. Oliver phoned me half an hour later and said that Robert had booked me. I shaved myself in the bathroom and put on my school uniform and took a taxi to South Kensington where Robert lives. As soon as I saw him I hugged him and kissed him and said ‘thank you, daddy”.

You know, he didn’t even want to do anything in the bedroom. He sat with me in the kitchen and made me peanut butter sandwiches and a chocolate milkshake and talked to me. He asked me to tell me everything about Kung and the house and I did, and then he asked me for the details of my bank account in Udon Thani and I gave them to him. Then he said that he would send £35,000 to my bank account and it would probably get there in two days, maybe three. I said I would pay him back and he said that I could pay him back when I had the money but that I wasn’t to worry about it. I asked him if he wanted to go into the bedroom but he said no, not today.

You know, I am so happy with Robert that really I would do anything for him. Really, anything. If he wanted anal or sex without a condom I think I would do it for him because he has been so good to me. But he didn’t want anything. He said the only thing he wanted to do was to help his little girl and that made me feel so sad that there were tears in my eyes.

I went home and in the taxi I phoned Oliver to say that I had finished the outcall job and he said he had three bookings for me, one at eleven o’clock, one at twelve-thirty and one at two o’clock. All were one hours and all were new customers and they all wanted sex. I was so tired when the last customer went that I fell asleep in my nurses uniform, which is what the last customer wanted. I woke up all hot and sticky because the uniform is made of vinyl and it isn’t really very comfortable.

In the morning there were more than a dozen text messages from customers saying that they missed me, and one from Robert which said ‘I sent the money. Daddy xxx’. I sent him a text back saying ‘Thank you, Daddy. I love you.’ You know, he is the first customer that I have ever said ‘I love you’ to.

Thursday was a very busy day. I did two hours outcall with Nancy in the Hilton Hotel with an American lawyer called Hank. Nancy didn’t say anything about paying me back the money she owed me, which annoyed me a lot because Hank gave her £420 plus a $100 tip. And she made me pay the taxi fare to and from the hotel.

Then I had one customer who was French. His name was Alain and he was bald and a bit fat but very nice. He had booked me for two hours incall and he asked me if I knew where I could get some cocaine so I phoned Vince and he came around with some. Alain asked me if I wanted some and actually I was a bit tired so I did sniff a bit, just to get some energy. Actually, it felt quite good, but I do not want to take it too often.

After Alain left Oliver phoned to say that Simon had booked me for three hours incall which was great because Simon always wants to watch a DVD and eat with me. He only has sex once so it’s easy work and he is quite nice, even though he keeps asking me to stop work and to live with him, which is a bit annoying.

After Simon had gone I had a bubble bath on my own to relax, but my heart kept beating really fast, which I suppose was the cocaine. You know, on Thursday I worked for seven hours and earned £1,170, of which I have to give Oliver £390. So I get to keep £780 plus the $100 tip I got from Hank. If I could earn that much every day, I will be able to pay Robert back in less than two months. I am so happy that I will own the house on my own and I will not have to see Kung again.

Chillies

2007-10-03T03:22:00.001-07:00

Something very funny happened on Monday night. Thai people were blamed for a terrorist attack in London. Can you believe it? Actually it was not a terrorist attack really, just some chillies burning on a stove. It was so funny. There is a Thai restaurant in Soho that we sometimes go to eat. The food is really good and we like the Thai lady who runs the restaurant. It is called Thai Cottage and it is in D’Arblay Street, near Oxford Street.

People in the street said that their eyes were burning so the police closed all the roads and evacuated all the people who lived there and firemen went in wearing breathing gear thinking that terrorists were trying to poison people. But they found a pot of chillies burning on a stove. The chef was making Nam Prik Pao which is delicious, it is a spicy dip made from shrimp and garlic and vegetable oil and chillies. Me and Nancy and Sandra have eaten it many times in Thai Cottage. But we never thought anyone would think it was a chemical weapon!

Yesterday I worked with Laura for the first time. The customer called Patrick from Belfast who I had seen with Nancy wanted to see me and Laura so he booked us for two hours incall at my apartment.

Laura came to my apartment first and she said she was a bit nervous because it was the first time she had worked with another girl. I said there was nothing to worry about because it was actually easy but she said that she wanted a drink so she opened a bottle of wine and drank two glasses before Patrick came. She was wearing black suspenders and a black bra so I put on my red suspenders and my black vinyl thigh-length boots which I think make me look very sexy. Patrick came at six o’clock and paid me and Laura straight away with £300 each. He had brought a bottle of champagne with him which was nice, so I went to the kitchen to open it. When I came back Laura was already giving him oral on the sofa so I took off my bra and started kissing him. He got very horny very quickly and we went into the bathroom and he had a bubble bath with Laura while I watched, then we went to the bedroom and he made love to me doggy-style while Laura kissed him and stroked his chest.

Laura didn’t seem shy at all. Patrick asked her to kiss me, and she did, and then he asked us for a lesbian show so I licked and kissed her and she moaned as if she was really enjoying it.

Then Patrick lay on his back and Laura rode him and she was really good, talking dirty to him to make him very horny. I kissed Patrick and stroked Laura’s breasts and I spoke dirty to him too, because I could see that he liked it.

Then Patrick said that he wanted to do anal and I said that I couldn’t and that I never did anal. He asked Laura and I was really surprised because she said okay, she had never done it but she would try. I asked her if she was sure and she said that she didn’t mind so long as it didn’t hurt. She took some KY Jelly and rubbed it over her bum and then lay down on the bed face down and told Patrick to do it very slowly. He was very careful and kept asking her if he was hurting her and she said it was okay, and then he pressed down and she gasped and I could see that he was right inside her. I kept stroking her face and asking her if she was okay and she just groaned and nodded. Then Patrick started to move and Laura really moaned, like it was hurting and she grabbed my hand and squeezed it really hard. Patrick moved slowly at first but then he started to move quite fast and hard. I thought Laura didn’t like it but then she started to tell him to do it harder, and she said ‘yes, yes, yes’ like she really was enjoying it. Patrick pulled her up so that she was on her knees doggy-style and he watched himself in the mirror. I kissed him and then I slid underneath Laura and kissed her as Patrick did her because I knew that would be sexy. Patrick came quite quickly then and Laura collapsed on top of me, breathing really hard. Later I asked her if she had really enjoyed anal and she said that it was okay and that it hadn’t hurt too much. She said that if felt quite strange and that I should try it some time. I said that I wasn’t a trisexual but she didn’t understand what I meant.

Patrick had a shower and then he came back to the bedroom and we gave him a body massage using lots of oil. I asked him why he hadn’t booked me and Nancy and he said that he had seen the photographs of me and Laura on the website and thought that we looked very sexy. He said that maybe next time he might book me, Laura and Nancy together. Can you believe that? One man and three girls? Actually I think that might be fun.

After Patrick and Laura had gone I phoned my mother in Thailand and asked her about the envelope but it hadn’t arrived yet. I told her to pay the money into my bank and not to give any to Kung. She asked me what was wrong and I said nothing, but that I didn’t want Kung to have any more of my money. Then I spoke to Daeng and he kept asking me when I was coming home and I said I didn’t know, that I was working hard to make a better life for him and me but that I loved him and missed him so much. That is true, I miss him every hour of every day. But I have to make money so I have to do this job.

Three months

2007-10-01T03:31:00.000-07:00

I have been an escort for three months now. I know I am a very different girl from when I started doing this job. For a start, I never cry any more. There is nothing to cry about. I make love for money, that is my job. And the better I do my job, the more money I get. I get to live in a nice apartment and I wear nice clothes and I can eat good food and do whatever I want. I am happy, I think. I try not to think about how many men I have had sex with. It is a lot. I could go to my book and count but really I do not want to.

Yesterday evening Nancy and Sandra came to my flat with some dim sum that they had bought in Chinatown. And they both paid me back some of the money that they owed me. Nancy paid me back £500 and Sandra paid me back £1,000. Sandra said she had had a really good week and they both thanked me, which was nice.

Sandra said that Belinda still hadn’t paid her back any of the money she had borrowed and I said that maybe she should ask her again because now she was very busy. Sandra asked me how I knew and I said that she had come to see me, and I told them about Belinda asking me to take care of some of her customers. I told them I wasn’t going to do it, of course, because it wouldn’t be fair to Oliver. Sandra seemed really angry and said that it wasn’t fair, that if Belinda was earning good money then she should pay her back straight away. I didn’t say anything but I did think that really she does the same – she borrowed money from me but still goes shopping and gambles a lot.

I also told them what Belinda had said about Alice, but said that it was a secret and that nobody should tell Alice. Sandra said that she knew that Alice used to be a dancer in Soi Cowboy but she didn’t know if she had ever killed anybody.

Nancy said that she had something to tell us. She has a friend who works for the A1 agency, which is one of the biggest in London, and she said that one of the A1 girls had been robbed. Not robbed like Laura had been robbed, but tied up and beaten until she told the robber where she kept her money. Now she was in hospital. I asked Nancy if the girl had spoken to the police but Nancy said she couldn’t because she was in England illegally. She had come over using another girl’s passport and that passport had been sent back to Thailand. So she had no passport and no visa and if the police caught her they would send her back to Thailand straight away. And Nancy said that even if the girl went to the police there was no evidence like CCTV pictures because the flat she worked in didn’t have CCTV. I felt very sorry for the girl, but she should have had a flat with CCTV really. I asked Nancy of the policeman I had met, the one called Neil, had talked to the A1 girls and she said that he had but because the girl didn’t have CCTV she couldn’t see who the customer was before she opened the door. That is not a good idea. A working girl should always know who is outside the door before she opens it.

We shared a taxi to Sloane Square but Nancy and Sandra got out really quickly so I had to pay. They always seem to do that. I do not know if it is an accident or if they do it on purpose. Anyway, I paid and I did not ask them for any money.

Cat was cooking Pad Thai and Thod Mun Pla which she cooks really well, and Sandra had brought some red pork from Chinatown and I had brought some lychees that I had bought from a shop in Edgware Road. All the rest of the girls were already in the flat and Alice and Rachel were already a little drunk, I think. They seem to be best friends, they always laugh at each other’s jokes and they kept clinking their glasses together.

This week I had £1,900 for Oliver, exactly the same as last week. Alice had £2,100 and Rachel had more. She gave Oliver £2,200 but Alice didn’t seem to care that she wasn’t the top earning girl. I think it is because now she is good friends with Rachel. Alice even gave Rachel a high five when she heard how much Rachel had, which she would never have done with Belinda.

Sandra had £1,800 which meant that she had kept £3,600 for herself so really I think she should have paid me back more than the £1,000 she gave me. Nancy had £1,400 for Oliver. Candy had the same as me, and Vicky had a good week and she gave Oliver £1,800. But it was Laura that surprised me again. She had £2,050 for Oliver. I had to work for a long time before I earned more than £6,000 in a week, but she has done that in only her second week. She has a one-year student visa and is already doing outcalls. And she told me that she already has some regular customers and one who is quite rich who has asked her to marry him. I think she is a natural at this job.

We ate the food and then we played cards. Rachel and Alice were drinking a lot, and everybody seemed happy. Then Alice and Sandra got into a bit of an argument, over nothing really. I think Alice wanted more ice and she asked Sandra to get it from the fridge and Sandra said she wasn’t a maid and Alice told her not to be stupid because she was dealing the cards so she couldn’t go to the kitchen and then Sandra said what would Alice do, kill her like she killed the girl in Soi Cowboy. I think she only said it because she was a bit drunk and she was joking, but Alice got really angry and asked her what she meant and then Sandra said that Belinda had told me the story of what had happened in Soi Cowboy and then everybody was looking at me and I just wanted to cry. Oliver was angry at me because I had been talking to Belinda, Alice was angry at me because she thought I had been telling lies about her, and I was angry at Sandra for getting me into trouble. Alice started shouting and I thought that she was going to hit me with a bottle but Rachel calmed her down and Laura took me into one of the bedrooms because she could see how upset I was.

Oliver and Cat calmed everyone down and Laura and I went back into the main room and played cards again but I could tell that Alice still wasn’t happy. But she said that it wasn’t me that she was angry at, it was Belinda. She wanted to kill Belinda, she said, and I think that she means it. I just kept quiet and played cards. I lost a lot of money. More than £1,000.

When we had finished I went home with Laura because I didn’t want to sleep alone. She told me not to worry and that it was just because Alice was drunk. I like Laura. She really does care about people. But she didn’t talk about the money she owes me. I told her about the girl at A1 who had beaten up and told her that she was lucky that she wasn’t hurt when she was robbed and she agreed with me. Money is just money, we can always earn more money if we have to.

Alice

2007-09-30T03:28:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Nancy called me and asked me if I wanted to go to her apartment to watch Manchester City play with her and Chris. I said no because I didn’t think it was worth watching them just because Khun Thaksin owned the team. It would be different if there were Thai players playing for the team but I don’t think Thai footballers are good enough to play in England. Actually, Thai people are not good at any team sports, but I do not know why that is. Maybe if eating Som Tam and singing karaoke were sports we would win medals but they are not so we don’t.

The real reason that I didn’t want to go to Nancy’s flat was because I didn’t want to see Chris. He keeps sending me text messages asking if he can come to my flat to see me but I ignore him. It is not fair. He is Nancy’s boyfriend so he should not be trying to have sex with me. I think I should tell Nancy but I am scared that if I do she will blame me. In the evening she phoned me and she was so happy because Manchester City had beaten Newcastle United 3-1 and she had bet £250 that they would win and she said she had won a lot of money. I didn’t think it was fair that she was gambling when she still owes me money. But now that she has won maybe she will pay me back when she sees me at the Sloane Square flat on Sunday night. I hope so.

In the evening I had a customer at six o’clock. His name was Richard and he came in a tracksuit and running shoes. He said he lived in Queensway which is not to far away and that he had told his wife that he had gone out running. It was so funny. We had sex, twice, and then he put his tracksuit back on and went. He didn’t want to shower because he wanted to go back all sweaty so that his wife would believe he had been out running. I wonder what she would think if she found out what had really made him sweat!

Then Belinda phoned me and asked if she could come to my flat because she wanted to talk to me. I had an outcall booking at eleven o’clock but said that she could come and see me before then so she came at eight o’clock. She brought a whole watermelon with her which was nice because she remembered how much I like to eat watermelon. I made her some Japanese green tea and we drank it and ate the watermelon.

Belinda said that she was really busy which was why she wanted to talk to me. She said that some days she was having to turn down customers and she was worried that she might lose business if those customers started going somewhere else. She wanted to send some customers to see me on the days when she was busy. Her customers paid £200 an hour and she said that I could keep £160 and just give her £40. Actually that is a very good deal. When I see a customer through Oliver’s agency I charge £150 an hour but I only get to keep £100 for myself. If I saw Belinda’s customers I would keep £160. That is a big difference. Belinda said that if I wanted I could put my photographs on her website. That way some customers might ask to see me and she would do the same deal and let me keep £160.

I think it would be great to have the extra money but I don’t think Oliver would be happy. That is what I said to Belinda but she said that Oliver wouldn’t know and I said well of course he would if he saw my photographs and she said that the photographer could hide my face or blur it a bit.

I said that I didn’t think it would be fair to Oliver and she said that Oliver wasn’t fair to his girls, that he took a third of what they earned and all he did was answer the phone. Actually there is more to it than that but I didn’t want to argue with Belinda. I said I would think about it but really I have already made up my mind.

Then Belinda started asking questions about Alice and I realised that she is still angry about the fight at the Sloane Square flat. The bruise on her face doesn’t look too bad now and with her make up on you can hardly see it, but I don’t think she has forgotten or forgiven Alice. Then Belinda told me a story about Alice that I am not sure is true or not. She said that Alice used to be a go-go dancer in Soi Cowboy in a bar called Long Gun. She said that Alice took a lot of drugs, especially a drug called Yar Bar. A lot of go-go dancers take Yar Bar, she said, because it gives them energy, but it also makes them crazy. That is why it is called Yar Bar. In Thai that means Crazy Drug.

Belinda said that Alice was always fighting with girls in other bars in Soi Cowboy, because she was jealous if they went with her customers. And one night she got into a fight with another dancer and hit her with a bottle, the same as she hit Belinda. But the bottle broke and the glass cut the other girl’s throat and she died. The police came but Alice ran away and she got a passport in the name of another girl and she came to England. Belinda said that Alice can’t go back to Thailand because the police are still looking for her, and if they knew that she was in London they would come to get her. I don’t know if that story is true and Belinda wouldn’t say how she knew.

I asked her about the magic perfume that makes men fall in love and she said that if I wanted I could use it one day. It definitely worked, she said, which is why it is so expensive. She had used it on four customers now and they all wanted to marry her and take care of her. She said she was careful who she used it on because she didn’t want someone ugly or poor falling in love with her. The best thing was for someone rich and old because then they would die soon and she would get all their money. She might marry the rich American customer she had, but first he had to build her a house and give her a car to prove that he did have money. If he did that then she might marry him. He was quite old and she thought that she might die soon. She smiled and said that if he didn’t die soon then she had another magic potion that would take care of that and then she laughed but I don’t think she was joking. I think she was serious. I know that Alice is dangerous but actually I think Belinda is dangerous, too.

Smurfs

2007-09-29T02:42:00.000-07:00

I went to the Post Office yesterday and I sent the envelope to my mum in Udon Thani. I sent it by Registered Post so that she will have to sign for it when she gets it so I know that it will get there safely. I put in a letter telling her to take the £4,000 right to the bank and not to give any of it to Kung, even if he asks. Sometimes Kung goes to my mum’s house to see her and Daeng and I don’t want her giving him any of my money.

I spoke to Kung yesterday. He phoned me six times and I didn’t answer, but then I answered the seventh time. It was two o’clock in the morning so I told him that I had just got home from the restaurant. He didn’t ask me how I was or anything, he just started talking about the house immediately. He said he wanted to put a 46 inch plasma television in the bedroom but that he would need 60,000 baht for that which is almost £1,000. And he said the builder wanted another 35,000 baht for the marble tiles in the master bathroom. And he said he might be able to buy another piece of land at the back of the house so that we could make the garden bigger. The land would cost 100,000 baht and another 50,000 baht to build a wall around it. He wanted to know when I could send him the money because he didn’t want someone else to buy the land.

Can you believe it? He was asking me for 245,000 baht which is almost £4,000 but I am supposed to be working as a waitress in a Thai restaurant. I knew then for sure one hundred per cent that he is using me, He knows that I am working for the agency, he knows that I am selling my body. He knows and he doesn’t care. All he cares about is the money that I send him.

I didn’t say anything, though. I just said I didn’t have much money but I would try to get some. That was a lie. I am lying to him now the same way that he lies to me. I will lie to him while I work out what I can do.

Vince came to see me in the afternoon. He phoned Oliver and booked me under his real name. I think he forgot that he used to be James. Actually, I thought that Oliver should have realised because he should be keeping a record of who comes to see me, for security. But I think Oliver isn’t worried about security, he is just worried about the commission I am to pay him. Anyway, Vince booked me for two hours and he was very happy because he had just sold some cocaine to a group of students and they had spent £2,000.

I gave him a bubble bath and oral and then he did oral on me which was actually really nice, and then we had sex. I didn’t come but I pretended to. Afterwards I asked him about his money. I said that I didn’t know what to do with mine and I wanted to send some to my bank in Thailand. Vince said you had to be careful when you put money in the bank in England because sometimes the banks would tell the police about you. He said if the police found out you were putting a lot of cash in the bank then they would ask you where it came from and if it was illegal then they would take it off you.

I asked him what he did with his money and he laughed and said that he used Smurfs. I didn’t know what a Smurf was. He explained that a Smurf was someone who put money into the bank for you. You paid them to put small amounts of money into lots of bank accounts. Instead of putting £10,000 into one bank you put £1,000 into each of ten banks. And you paid the Smurfs a commission of five per cent. For every one thousand pounds they paid in, you gave them £50. You had to trust the Smurfs, of course, because they might run away with your money. If they did that you had to find the Smurf and hurt him to show to the other Smurfs that it was not a good idea to steal. Vince said that most of his Smurfs were students. He said if I wanted I could use his Smurfs. He said what I should do is to open a bank account using my passport and my electricity bill or something else that showed where I lived, and I should deposit about £500. Then I should give money to Smurfs and they will pay it into different accounts and then transfer it my account. Because it is small amounts of money, the police don’t care. Vince says that every week he gives more than £10,000 to the Smurfs. Then he transfers the money to banks in Jersey and Hungary and he said that even if the police catch him they will never get his money. I think Vince is quite clever so I said okay, I would like to use his Smurfs. I didn’t want him to see where I hide my money but I did have £800 in my kitchen drawer plus the £300 he had paid me so I asked him if I could give him the £1,100 to give to the Smurfs. He laughed and said that I had to open my bank account first. Then he said he had a better idea, he said I could give him the £1,100 and he would transfer £1,100 from his account to my account. That seemed like a great idea to me so I gave him the money and the number of my bank account in Udon Thani. I am so glad to have met Vince.

In fact, I am very lucky with my customers. Most of them are so nice. Especially Peter and Robert and Vince. They want to help me because they like me, I think. Before I went to bed I sent them all messages saying good night. And I sent Simon a message saying that I missed him. I sent that message to another ten customers and seven sent me replies before I fell asleep. They all said that they missed me too.

My money

2007-09-28T02:11:00.000-07:00

ทำไมมีไครว่าเราไม่ใช่ไทย เราอาจจะเร่มเขียนไทยแล้วดีก่วา

I thought a lot about Laura and the money she lost. I think I am stupid to keep all my money in the flat, but I am not sure what to do with it. I have an account with the Kasikorn Bank in Udon Thani. Kasikorn means Thai Farmer. Actually the bank used to be called Thai Farmers Bank but the owners of the bank thought that the name confused farangs so they changed it but now I think farangs are even more confused because they don’t know what Kasikorn means. The problem is I do not know how to get the cash from my room into my bank account in Udon Thani. I was going to ask Kung to help me but now I know that he is only using me so I can not ask him. I think the best way is to send it to my mother so that she can put it into my bank account. I think what I will do is to put fifty pound notes into a DVD case and send it to my mother. I can get £2,000 into one case so I will put two cases into a padded envelope and send it to my mother. She can then put the £4,000 into my bank account and they will change it into Thai baht for me. I think it is a good plan.

Yesterday I had three customers. One was a young man in a suit who was so nervous that he kept stammering. He was quite cute. I think it might have been his first time with a working girl because he didn’t know what to do. And he came so quickly that he was very embarrassed. He said that he had always wanted to try an Asian girl and I said it was okay, we were the same as any other girl. After he came I gave him a massage and then oral and he got hard again and the second time was much better. Afterwards he said that actually it was his first time with a girl, that he was a virgin before he came to see me, but I am not sure if he is telling the truth or not. His name was Phillip and I gave him my phone number.

The second customer was called Jon, without an ‘H’. I actually have three customers called Jon without an ‘H’. They are all English. The Jon from yesterday was very tall and thin, he looked like he could be a basketball player. He had to bend his head when he walked into my bedroom so that he wouldn’t bang it on the door and his feet were hanging over the edge of the bed. He looked like a giant. His dick wasn’t very big, though. Jon said he worked for a double glazing company and that he had just been paid a big bonus so he wanted to treat himself. I thought that was quite sweet, it was like I was a prize. I couldn’t give him a bubble bath because he was too tall but I showered with him and then we had sex in the bedroom, with me on top. It was funny seeing his feet sticking off the edge of the bed but I tried not to laugh. I think he is my tallest customer by far.

The third customer was called Mark. Mark booked me for two hours and he said he drove a delivery van but I don’t think he was telling the truth. Actually he reminded me of Vince and I think maybe he sold drugs. But I don’t care if customers lie to me or not, all I care about is if they are good customers and Mark was okay. He wanted oral and then sex doggy-style while he watched me in the mirror. I did what I always do when I do it that way and look at his eyes in the mirror and open my mouth a bit and lick my lips, the way that Candy showed me. And I moan a bit and say ‘yes, yes, yes’ because customers like to think that I’m enjoying it. I’m not sure what that is, because they are paying me for sex so why does it matter whether I like it or not? All that should matter is how it feels, right? But I’ve noticed that if I pretend to come when the customer is having sex with me, they come at the same time or very soon afterwards. It’s as if seeing me come makes it more sexier for them. Now I always pretend to come. Actually, sometimes I really do come, but not often. And I don’t think a customer can tell the difference. That is the big difference between a man and a woman, I think. With a man, you always know if he comes. There is evidence. But with a woman, you never really can tell.

Laura

2007-09-27T03:18:00.001-07:00

Laura phoned me yesterday afternoon. She was crying because someone had stolen her money and she asked me if I would go around to her flat so I said that I would. It was quiet and I hadn’t had any customers though Simon had booked me for three hours starting at 8pm so I knew that I would be watching a DVD and eating either Chinese food or a pizza.

Laura was still crying when I got to her flat. The customer who had taken her money was called Ronnie. She said he was quite nice and wearing an expensive leather jacket and nice shoes and a sovereign ring and a thick gold chain on his wrist. He had booked her for two hours incall and as soon as he let her in he had given her the money, £300 in an envelope. She had put the money in a kitchen drawer which is where she keeps all her money. Then she had given him a drink and they had sex on the sofa in the sitting room and then they went into the bedroom and they had sex again. Laura said that he was quite funny and made her laugh. After they had sex for the second time she went into the bathroom to shower. When she came out he had already got dressed and he seemed in a hurry to go. He told her that he had a meeting and he went. It was only when Laura’s second customer came that she realised that Ronnie had taken all the money that was in the drawer. Yes, he had taken the £300 he had brought but she also had another £2,400 in the drawer and he had taken that as well. She was so upset that she gave the second customer his money back and told him to go, then she had phoned Oliver.

Oliver said it was her own fault and that she still had to pay him the £100 commission from Ronnie and the commission from the second customer, even though she hadn’t had sex with him. Laura said that it wasn’t fair but I could understand why Oliver wanted his money because really it wasn’t his fault. I felt very sorry for Laura but really it was her own fault for leaving all her money in the kitchen and for letting the customer see where she kept her money. I know that stealing is wrong but that doesn’t mean that people don’t steal. People do steal so you have to be careful with your money.

I never let a customer see where I hide my money. In fact I never hide my money while a customer is there. When the customer gives me my money I say thank you and give them a kiss on the cheek and then I put the money on the coffee table. That is when I phone Oliver to say that everything is okay. But then I leave the money on the coffee table so that I can see where it is. Then if the customer tries to take the money I will see what he is doing straight away. Then when he has gone I hide it in the kitchen drawer where I keep my book. Then when I have a thousand pounds in the drawer I put it in an envelope and hide it under the carpet behind the sofa. Do you know I have more than £25,000 now? In Thailand you would have to work for more than four years to earn that much money and I have it in cash under my carpet. All the girls are careful where they hide their money. Nancy puts it behind a panel under the bath and Sandra keeps it in the freezer compartment of her fridge. I don’t know where Alice keeps hers because she won’t say.

I explained to Laura about hiding her money and she listened and said that I was very clever at this job. Actually, she is right. I have only been doing this job for three months but I do know many things. I think now I am quite professional.

Laura kept crying and saying that Oliver wasn’t fair. Ronnie had stolen £2,700 from her and £900 of that money was for Oliver. So she had lost £2,700 but she had to give Oliver £900 so really she had lost £3,600. And she had to give him £50 for the customer she had sent away. Laura said it was Oliver’s fault because Oliver had sent her the customer. He had sent her the man who had stolen from her so he was to blame, not her. I didn’t want to argue with her but really I thought that it was her fault, not Oliver’s.

Laura said that Oliver should check on the customers, but he can’t really do that. Oliver never gets to meet them, he only talks to them on the phone. Oliver told Laura that he had called Ronnie’s number but the phone had been switched off. I think he probably threw the Sim card away. Laura started crying again and asked me what she should do. I said there was nothing she could do. She couldn’t go to the police so she would just have to work hard to make more money. She started crying again and said that she owed money to Cat and to Oliver and she had to pay her council tax and her electricity bill and she needed more condoms and shampoo. I said that I would lend her £1,000 and she stopped crying and hugged me and said that I was a good friend. Then Oliver rang me and said that I had a two hour booking so I had to go back home.

My customer was called Tim and he was an estate agent, tall and quite good-looking. Everything was okay until he asked me if I would do anal, and I said I wouldn’t. Some of the girls do but I never have. I think it would hurt too much. Tim said he would pay me an extra £50 if I did anal with him but I said that it wasn’t about money, it was about not wanting to do it. I told him that I wasn’t a trisexual, and he said that he didn’t understand. I said I wouldn’t try everything sexual and he laughed and then it was all okay. He asked me for my number when he left and I gave it to him because actually he was a good customer.

Simon bought three DVDs with him and the only one that I hadn’t seen was 16 Blocks staring Bruce Willis so we watched that and ate pizza. He sat with his arm around me and kept whispering that he loved me. The movie was okay but I like Bruce Willis better in the Die Hard movies. Now I think he is too old to be an action star. When the movie was finished we had sex in the bedroom and then I gave him a massage. Simon said that if I married him and stopped doing this job he would buy me a house in Thailand and take care of me for ever. I said I was happy to take care of myself but that he was my favourite customer and that made him a little bit happy. Actually it wasn’t true. Peter and Robert are my favourite customers. But I wanted Simon to be happy because so long as he is happy he will keep coming to see me.

Helen

2007-09-26T01:42:00.001-07:00

Sometimes things happen to me that I just can’t believe. When it happens it’s like a dream and actually happening to someone else. Like last night. I had an outcall at the Ritz which is a really good hotel, one of the best hotels in London. The customer’s name was Marco and he was staying in a suite. Marco was Italian, good looking with black hair and blue eyes and a really good body. He had booked me for two hours and I got to the hotel right on time at seven o’clock. I was wearing a black Karen Millen dress and my Kenzo coat and Prada high heels and I was carrying my Louis Vuitton bag, the one that Cat had sold me. And I was wearing Chanel sunglasses. A lot of rich Asian tourists wear sunglasses even at night so I have started wearing them. I bought the Chanel ones from Harrods for £180 and they look really good.

Anyway, I walked to the lift and went up to Marco’s floor. When he opened the door I was surprised because he was very good looking and young. If you can afford to stay at the Ritz you have to be rich and in my experience most rich people are not young or good-looking, unless they are movie stars or pop singers or sports stars. Marco paid me my money straight away and I phoned Oliver to say that everything was okay.

Marco gave me a soft drink and then we sat on the sofa. He said that he was a lawyer and that he was in London on business. Actually he is very clever and speaks five languages. I started to unzip his trousers but he asked me to wait because he had booked another girl from another agency. I was surprised because Oliver hadn’t said anything about another girl but before I could say anything there was a knock on the door. Marco opened the door and it was a pretty blonde girl with long legs and really large breasts. I thought that perhaps Marco had wanted an Asian girl and a blonde girl together so he had to use another agency but I think he should have told me first.

The girl took off her coat and Marco gave her money, and she said she wanted champagne so Marco got a bottle from the fridge and opened it. The girl said her name was Helen and like Marco she was from Italy. She was very sexy, actually, and as soon as Marco sat down on the sofa she unzipped his trousers and started giving him oral sex. She was very good at it, like a porn star. I started to kiss Marco and then she started to rub my breasts so I stroked her hair and moaned like I was really enjoying it. Then the girl kissed me, really hard so that her tongue was right down my throat, and then she pushed my head down so that I was giving Marco oral. She was quite strong and it was almost as if she was in charge.

Helen took off her dress and her bra and then she made Marco suck her breasts while I gave him oral, then she started undressing me. Marco helped her and I was soon naked. Then Marco kissed me on the mouth while the girl kissed me between the legs. She was really good, better than Nancy, and she put her tongue really far inside me. I was moaning a lot and I wasn’t faking it because it felt really sexy. Then Marco took his clothes off and he sat on top of me so that I was giving him oral while the girl gave me oral. The girl was stroking my legs as she licked me and actually she was driving me a bit crazy. Then Marco said we should go to the bedroom. He picked me up and carried me to the bedroom. Helen followed us, drinking from the champagne bottle.

The bed was a king size and Marco put me down in it and I was feeling really horny. He started kissing Helen and stroking her breasts and then he took off her panties and I couldn’t believe it. Helen was a ladyboy. Really! She was really hard, too. Should I say ‘she’ or ‘he’? I really don’t know. She had a really pretty face and long blonde hair and large breasts and her skin was really soft but she also had a dick that was very hard. Marco was holding her as he kissed her and they kept talking in Italian. I didn’t understand the words but I could tell that they were both very horny. I sat up because I wasn’t horny any more.

Marco got onto the bed and said that he wanted Helen to make love to me but I shook my head and said ‘no way’. He said it would be just like making love to another man but I said no, I couldn’t make love to a ladyboy. Helen started to stroke my leg and said it was okay, I could close my eyes and imagine it was Marco doing it but I said I was sorry, I just couldn’t.

Then Marco said I could just give Helen oral while he made love to her but I said I couldn’t. Marco got a bit annoyed but really he couldn’t make me. Actually Helen was cute and I did like it when she was kissing me but she is a ladyboy and there is no way I can make love to a ladyboy. No way.

I said that Marco could make love to me but I couldn’t make love to Helen. Then he said that he understood, so he said he would make love to Helen while I watched and I said that would be okay. Actually, Helen made love to Marco and he really seemed to like it. It was a bit like watching a porn movie. Marco asked me if I would give him oral while Helen made love to him and I did because that was okay. He got really horny when I did give him oral and it made Helen horny too and she started shouting at him in Italian and then he came in my mouth.

Afterwards Helen and I gave Marco a massage and then we both gave him oral and Helen asked me if I would change my mind because she really wanted to make love to me but I said I was sorry, I just couldn’t.

Later that night Vince booked me for two hours incall. He used his real name this time and he brought some cocaine with him. He sniffed some but I didn’t want any, then we had sex and then we lay talking for more than hour. I told him all about the ladyboy and he thought it was very funny. He said only gays would want to have sex with a ladyboy but I said I didn’t think that Marco was gay. I said that maybe he was bisexual.

Vince laughed and said that actually he was a trisexual. I didn’t understand and asked him what a truisexual was. He said a trisexual would try anything sexual, which I thought was really funny. I know for sure that I am not a trisexual because I could never make love to a ladyboy. It just wouldn’t be right.

Kung phoned five times during the night but I had my phone set to silent and I did not answer. I do not know what to say to him yet.

Chris

2007-09-25T03:16:00.000-07:00

Chris came to see me yesterday. He had booked me through the agency and said that his name was Paul and I didn’t see his face on the CCTV and it was too late when I opened the door so I had to let him in. He was laughing and telling me that I looked very surprised which is true, I was. Chris is Nancy’s kik and he shouldn’t have come to see me. I was wearing my black stocking and suspenders and my Gucci high heels and I had spent ages getting my hair to look nice but when I saw it was Chris I put on my bathrobe. Chris took £150 from his pocket and tried to give it to me but I said that I couldn’t do anything with him because he was Nancy’s boyfriend. He said that Nancy would never know and that he didn’t love her but he really wanted to be with me. What made me really angry was that I was sure that the money he was trying to give me was money that Nancy had given him.

Chris tried to kiss me but I pushed him away. He asked what was wrong because he had money and I told him again, I couldn’t do anything because he was Nancy’s boyfriend. He got angry then and he grabbed me and pushed me onto the sofa and he tried to have sex with me, but I scratched him and pushed him away. He said I was a hooker so why was I fighting him and I ran to the kitchen and got a knife and said that if he came near me again I’d cut off his dick and throw it out of the window. He called me a lot of names but then he went away. I was so angry that I cried. I can’t tell Oliver what happened and I will have to pay him his £50 commission even though I didn’t get any money. And I am not sure if I can tell Nancy or not. Maybe she will blame me. Maybe she will think I wanted him to come to see me. Sometimes men can be really unfair. And it wasn’t fair to call me a hooker. Just because I am a working girl doesn’t mean that I have sex with everybody. And I am sure that I will not have sex with my friend’s boyfriend. Never, never, never.

I wish all men could be more like Robert. Robert is always sweet and kind. Not long after Chris left, Oliver phoned me to tell me that Robert had booked me for three hours that evening. Oliver could tell from my voice that I was upset and he asked me if everything was okay and I said I was just a little bit tired.

I had two customers before I went to see Robert. One was a nice young man called John who only wanted oral and who pulled my hair really tightly when he came. He said he worked for the council tax department and if I ever needed help with my tax he would help me and he gave me his phone number. He was wearing a wedding ring so I think he was married. The other customer was older, about sixty, I think, and he couldn’t get hard no matter what I did. I gave him a bath and then a massage and then oral but he just would not get hard. I felt a bit sorry for him. His name was Martin and he said his wife had died two years ago and that he had loved her very much. He said that he hadn’t been able to have sex since she had died, but that sometimes he just wanted to be close to a woman again. Actually it was a very sad story. I almost made him come but then his hour was up so he had to go because he said he didn’t have enough money to stay any longer.

After Martin went I showered and put on my make up and my school uniform because Robert always likes me to wear school uniform when I go to see him. Robert is such a nice man, and always so kind to me. He made me peanut butter sandwiches which now I quite like to eat, and a strawberry milkshake because I like it better than milk on its own. Then he gave me a bath which I also quite like. Usually I give the customer a bath but Robert likes to bathe me and he is very soft and gentle. His bathroom is bigger than my whole apartment and the bath is huge, big enough for three people but he never gets in the bath with me. Then he dried me with a fluffy towel that he said came from Egypt and then he carried me into the bedroom and kissed my feet and licked my toes until he made himself come. I am always so relaxed when I have been with Robert, he actually makes me forget that I am a working girl. I think he could tell that I wasn’t happy and he kept asking me what was wrong. I really wanted to tell somebody about all the bad things that are happening in my life, so I told him about my friends not paying me back the money they had borrowed, about Nancy’s boyfriend wanting to have sex with me, and about Kung.

Robert listened and said he wanted to help me. He said he had lots of money and that if I needed money he could give me some. I said it was okay and that I was earning good money at the agency but he said that wasn’t enough money to solve my problem. He said I should tell Kung that I would buy his half of the house, and Robert would lend me the money. I said it would be a lot, it would be about one and a half million baht which is more than £20,000 and he laughed and said that wasn’t a lot, not really. He said he would lend it me and I could pay him back when I had enough money. He was so kind that he actually made me cry and he put his arms around me and told me not to worry, that I was his little girl and he would take care of me.

I had one more customer last night. He didn’t come until two o’clock in the morning. He was about fifty and his head was shaved but he smelled really nice and his name was Harry. I think he had been taking Viagra because he was sniffing a bit and he stayed hard all the time he was with me. He made love to me three times, once on the sofa and twice on the bed, in lots of positions. Once he had my shoulders on the floor while my hips were on the bed and he was sort of standing over me. He was inside me so deep that it hurt a bit but actually I didn’t mind at all because all I could think about was Robert and the money he was going to give me. I am so lucky to have Robert as my customer.

My problem

2007-09-24T02:28:00.001-07:00

Kung phoned me ten times yesterday but I didn’t speak to him, not one time. I am not sure what I should do about him but I know one thing for sure and that is that he does not love me. And I do not want to be his Mia Noi any more. I am not angry with Cat and Oliver because I am happy working as an escort, but I am not happy with Kung because he lied to me.

I had a very good week and when I went to the Sloane Square flat I had £1,900 for Oliver. I almost had as much as Alice but she had more, exactly £2,000. Sandra had £1,400 which meant that she had earned £2,800 for herself plus tips but she only paid me back £1,000 of what she owed me. That didn’t seem fair. I know she has a problem with Belinda but that is her problem, not my problem. Nancy had £1,200 for Oliver and she didn’t offer to pay me back any of the money that she owed me. I don’t think that Sandra and Nancy are fair because they both played cards and they both lost a lot of money. Sandra lost £700 and Nancy lost £340. I think they should pay me back before they waste money playing cards but I didn’t say anything.

Candy had a very good week and she gave Oliver £1,550, Vicky had £1,250 and Wanda had £1,200. Rachel had her period last week so she didn’t work too hard and she had just £900 for Oliver. The big surprise was Laura. It was her first week and she had earned £4,200 and so she had £1,400 for Oliver, the same as Sandra. Cat said that she was a natural and that two customers had already gone back to see her twice. I can see why she does so well because she is always happy and smiling and she seems quite young. I think most customers like young girls. Laura seemed to have changed very quickly. She was laughing and joking and drinking beer and she lost quite a lot of money playing cards. I lost money, too, almost £700, because I couldn’t concentrate. Everybody asked me what was wrong but I didn’t say. I can’t tell anyone about my problem.

Now I know

2007-09-23T03:12:00.000-07:00

Sandra came to my flat to see me yesterday morning, with her boyfriend Andy. She said that Belinda had a new website and that she was working on her own and charging £200 an hour as an escort. Actually, that seemed a really good idea. She will be earning twice as much as I earn because she does not have to pay an agency. After I have paid Oliver his commission I get £100 an hour. Belinda will get to keep all of her £200. Sandra said that she had been to Belinda’s flat in South Kensington but she wasn’t there. She had moved. And her old phone number wasn’t working. She and Andy had spent hours looking at websites on the internet and they had finally found her. Now she had a different name. She was calling herself Tanya. And she had a different phone number.

Sandra said she was really angry at Belinda because she still owed her most of the £18,000 for the contract and she had leant her £3,000 for her flat which meant that she still owed Sandra about £20,000 which is a lot of money. I used my laptop to look at Belinda’s website and actually it was quite good. The pictures were very sexy and the English was really good even though Belinda does not speak very good English. I think somebody must have helped her. Sandra asked me if I would go with her to speak to Belinda. I didn’t want to but I said I would. Actually I am a bit worried that Sandra will not be able to pay me what she owes me if Belinda does not pay her first.

Andy used his phone to call the number on the website and she answered. He asked if he could have two hours incall and she said yes, that would be £380 and she gave him her address. It was as easy as that.

Her new flat is in Gloucester Place, which is near Baker Street. We drove there in Andy’s Porsche. He drove very fast and kept stamping on the brakes. People in Thailand do not drive very well but I think they drive better than Andy. I was in the back and I was a bit scared. I do not know why men like to drive Porches. They are quite small, really.

There was no camera outside the building but there was an intercom and Andy pressed it. Then we heard Belinda ask who it was and he said ‘Dave’ which was the name he had used to make the booking. Then the door buzzed open. Sandra asked Andy if he would wait outside because Belinda might worry if she saw him and all she wanted to do was to talk to her and Andy said okay.

Belinda’s flat is on the third floor so we walked upstairs and rang the bell to her flat. When she opened the door her eyes went wide she was so shocked. I think she was going to shut the door but Sandra pushed it open. Belinda was wearing a very sexy red vinyl dress and had high heels and she had on a lot of make up which helped to hide the bruises on her face. She didn’t ask what had happened to Dave so I think that she knew that Sandra had tricked her.

Her flat was very nice with tall ceilings and an old-fashioned fireplace. She had a really big sofa and a marble coffee table and there were nice pictures on the wall. I think she must be paying a lot of rent.

Sandra kept smiling but I could see she wasn’t happy. Belinda made us Chinese tea and brought some small cakes from the kitchen. Belinda was asking lots of questions about Oliver and the girls, but I could see that she was a bit worried. Then Sandra asked her about the money that Belinda owed her and Belinda said that right now she didn’t have any because she had used £2,000 to pay for the deposit on the flat and she had to pay a farang to design her website and that had cost £1,000 and she had had to use two photographers because the first photographer had done a really bad job. So far she had had only four customers so she didn’t have any money to spare.
Sandra said that Belinda wasn’t fair because Sandra had paid a lot of money to bring her to London and she had paid for the apartment in South Kensington. Belinda said she had wanted to move because she thought Oliver wouldn’t be happy if she worked in the same apartment but I don’t think that was true. I think she wanted to move because the new flat was much nicer than the old one.

Sandra asked Belinda when she would pay her back some of the money she owed her and Belinda said maybe next week. Sandra kept smiling but I could see she was not happy. Thai people often smile even when they are hurt or angry. That is why they call Thailand the Land of Smiles. But sometimes Thai people can be dangerous when they smile.

We drank our tea and ate some cakes and then we left. Belinda said that she would phone Sandra when she had some money for her.

Sandra said she was hungry so we Andy drove us to a Thai restaurant in St Johns Wood. Sandra told Andy what had happened and he said if she wanted he would go and talk to her and make her give him the money, but Sandra said that wasn’t a good idea.

Sandra had been to the restaurant many times and everyone knew her and Andy. We ordered sea bass and Pad Thai and vegetables in oyster sauce and Thod Mun Kung which are like fried fish cakes only made from prawn. Andy drank Singha beer and Sandra had whiskey but I just drank water. I asked Andy if the food was good and he said it was, and I asked him if it was as good as the restaurant I had worked in, the one in Camden, and he said he hadn’t been there for a long time. That was strange because when he and Sandra had met me in the restaurant when I worked there they had told me that it was one of their favourite restaurants.

When the food came I spoke to Sandra in Thai so that Andy wouldn’t understand what we were saying. First I asked her about the money she owed me. She said she couldn’t pay me back yet because she didn’t have the money from Belinda. Then I asked her about the first time she met me, in the restaurant in Camden. I asked her if she had gone there to eat or if she had gone there to see me. She pretended not to understand what I meant. I said I wanted to know if Cat had told her to go to the restaurant, and if Cat had told her that I worked there. I could see from the look on her face that I was right. Cat had sent her. I think she was going to lie to me but before she could speak I said she had to tell me the truth because it wasn’t fair to lie to me. Then she said yes, Cat had told her my name and that I worked at the restaurant and that Cat wanted her to tell me about the agency. Sandra said she didn’t want me to tell Cat that I knew and I said of course, I just wanted to know the truth. Sandra said that sometimes Cat saw girls who she knew would be good working girls and she asked Sandra to talk to them, the same as we did with Lek. I said everything was okay and that I was happy working for the agency. Happy with the money, anyway.

After we had finished eating the bill came and Sandra said she was short of money so did I mind paying. I did mind actually but I paid. I think she should have paid or her boyfriend should have paid because they had wanted me to go with them, but I didn’t say anything, I just paid the bill. They drove me home and I got ready for work because Oliver had called me to say that I already had three bookings for the evening, all incall.

I can’t even remember what the three customers looked like because I was thinking too much about Kung and Cat. Now I think I know everything. Kung wants me to do this job because he wants money from me. He knows Cat because she is from Udon Thani and I think he sent me to London so that I would do this job. I think he told Cat where I worked and Cat sent Sandra to talk to me and to persuade me to work for the agency. It was all a plan. Now I know for sure that Kung does not love me. He sent me to London so that I would work as a prostitute. I don’t think he ever really loved me because if he did love me he would not want me to do this job. I hate him now but I am not sure what I should do. We are building the house together in Udon Thani but he did all the paperwork so I do not know if he put it in my name or his. So far the land and the house has cost about three million baht and most of that money has been from me. Now I can not sleep because I am thinking too much. Kung phoned me four times today but I did not answer the phone. I know what he wants. He wants more money.

Famous

2007-09-22T05:06:00.001-07:00

I can’t believe what happened yesterday. I had someone very famous as my customer. Very famous! If I say who it was, everyone would know. He is a famous actor from America, very handsome and very cute! He had booked me and Nancy together for two hours incall at Nancy’s apartment and he had used the name David, but that wasn’t his real name. Chris was at Nancy’s apartment again and he kept looking at me in the way I don’t like. I don’t know why Nancy lets him stay there all the time. Actually I do, she does not like being on her own. I am the same, but I do not have a kik to keep me company. Anyway, Nancy gave Chris £50 and he went to the pub while we waited for David. When he rang the bell we looked through the CCTV camera and he was wearing sunglasses and a baseball cap but when we opened the front door we knew who he was right away.

He was laughing because he knew that we had recognised him. He said he was in London to talk about his new movie with a producer here. And what was really funny was that I had been watching one of his movies on DVD on Thursday. I had been watching him on the screen and now he was in Nancy’s apartment and we were going to make love to him. It was crazy. There are lots of girls who would give anything to be in bed with this man and he was paying us to have sex with him. Nancy was really excited and started kissing him right away. I asked him what he wanted to drink and he said anything would be okay. Nancy had a bottle of champagne in the fridge so I opened it and she had chocolates and strawberries in the fridge so I put them on the table for him.

Nancy sat down with him on the sofa and undid his trousers and gave him oral sex and I took off my bra so that he could kiss my breasts. I couldn’t believe what was happening. He is so famous, and he has a wife and his wife is a famous actress too. His wife is very beautiful and I don’t know why he would want to be with two working girls when he has such a beautiful wife. He started kissing me and he was a really good kisser. Nancy took off his trousers and then she went crazy. She told me in Thai that she was going to make love to him without a condom and that maybe she would get pregnant with his baby and then she would be rich. I told her that she was crazy but she took off her panties and started rubbing herself against him and making him really horny. I could see that he really wanted to make love to Nancy and for a moment I thought he was going to make love to her with no condom but then he pushed her off, laughing. He said he had to shower. I gave him a towel and he asked us if we had any cocaine. I said no but I could get some for £400. He asked me if it was okay to pay in dollars and I said sure and he gave me $800. He went into the shower with Nancy and I phoned Vince. Vince said he wasn’t far away and that he’d come around to the flat with the cocaine.

I went into the bathroom and got into the shower. Nancy was soaping him and kissing him and I helped. We both gave him oral in the shower and then Nancy started rubbing herself against him. She turned around and bent down and I could see that she was trying to get him to make love to her but he pushed her away and said that he had to wear a condom.

We both used towels to dry him and then we took him to the bedroom. Nancy gave him oral again while I kissed him. Then the bell rang. It was Vince. I put on a robe and opened the door and gave him £300 and he gave me the cocaine. He winked at me and said I looked sexy and that maybe he would come and see me later if he wasn’t too busy.

When I went back to the bedroom, Nancy was doing 69 with the customer but they stopped and the customer took some cocaine and gave some to Nancy. He asked if I wanted some but I said no, then Nancy said that I didn’t sniff cocaine but I would lick it off her pussy. He said he wanted to see that. I was a bit angry at Nancy but I did it because I had already done it before. This time Nancy put a lot on her pussy and she held my head tightly while I licked her and then while I was doing it, he made love to me, doggy-style. It actually felt quite good and I think this time the cocaine did affect me a bit.

Nancy pushed me away and said that she wanted to make love to him so I took off the condom. Nancy got a new condom and she told me to kiss him so that he couldn’t see what she was doing. I told her not to be stupid but she said that he wouldn’t know. I thought she was crazy but I kissed him and stroked his chest. Nancy opened the condom and pretended to put it on him, but then she pushed him inside her and started to make love to him. Nancy was moaning and telling him to come and I could tell from the way that he was kissing me that he was really horny and then he came. Nancy pretended to come, too. At least I think she was pretending. Then she got off him. She still had the condom in her hand and she pretended that she had taken it off him but I know that actually he had come inside her. She went to the bathroom and I lay next to him and stroked him.

He said he liked Asian girls but that he could never see Asian girls when he was in America because photographers followed him wherever he went. He said his wife would kill him if ever she found out what he did, and I think he is right. I do not understand why men with beautiful wives want to sleep with working girls.

Nancy came out of the bathroom. She told me that she could feel his sperm inside her and that she was sure she would have a beautiful baby. I told her that she was crazy, even if she got pregnant how would she ever get to talk to him again and she said it wouldn’t be a problem, she would get a lawyer in America.

We gave him a massage and then he asked us if we would do a lesbian show for him and we did. I think Nancy likes the lesbian shows more than I do, but she is very good at them. She likes it when I lick her breasts and she pushes herself against me and moans a lot. The customer got horny again and put on a condom and made love to me. I was on my back and Nancy got on top of me so that I was licking her pussy while she was kissing him. Actually, it was very sexy and I came just before he did.

We drank more champagne and Nancy asked him if he would send us signed photographs and he said that he would, but I am not sure if he really will.

When he went Nancy and I were laughing and jumping up and down. It was like a dream. I said that we mustn’t tell anybody and she said she was going to tell Chris and I said no, no one must know. It wouldn’t be fair if anyone knew. We had to be professional. I won’t even tell Vince, even though I would love to see his face if I told him who he had sold cocaine to.

Vince didn’t come to see me last night, so I suppose he was busy. I did see four customers, though, three incall and one outcall at the Marriott Hotel. None of them were anywhere near as handsome as the famous customer.

John

2007-09-21T01:46:00.000-07:00

I went to school again yesterday. Twice in one week, John was so surprised. He asked me into his office and closed the door and said he wanted to go out with me one evening, for a meal or a movie. I told him I was working and that the restaurant didn’t close until after midnight. Then he said that he’d been to the restaurant and they said I hadn’t worked there for three months. I didn’t say anything but I was very angry. I don’t understand why he checked up on me. It’s none of his business where I work. I said I had moved to another restaurant but I don’t think he believed me. Then he said that he really liked me and he tried to kiss me. I didn’t know what to do. I don’t want him to be angry with me but I don’t want a boyfriend. He kept saying that he loved me and that’s stupid because he doesn’t know me. I kissed him a little bit and then said that I had to go. Now I don’t know what to do. Maybe if I go out with him he’ll leave me alone.

Lek was at school. I am going to have to call her Laura because that is her working name. She was really excited. She said her apartment was really nice and she wanted me to see it so I went with her after school. It is a nice flat. It is bigger than mine and has an extra bedroom though it is quite small. But it means that she doesn’t have to sleep in the bed where she works, which is a good thing, I think. I don’t like sleeping in my bed and most nights I sleep on the sofa in the living room. My bed is where I work, it’s not where I sleep. Lek said she was really excited about working. Her pictures weren’t on the website yet but Oliver had said that he would send her customers anyway. Belinda’s pictures are still on the website and so are other girls who left a long time ago. She had made her bedroom look really nice and she had a Buddha figure on top of her wardrobe with some flowers and candles and there was a poster of a Thai temple on the back of her door.

She had boxes of condoms ready and KY jelly and there was lots of shampoo and soap in the bathroom. She said Cat had been shopping with her and told her what to buy. She had taken a mirror from the living room and put it against the wall at the end of the bed and I knew that had been Sandra’s idea.

She asked me what it was like, the first time that I had been with a customer. I said that I had cried, but that really it hadn’t been that bad. Most customers were nice and if a customer wasn’t nice you just had to think about something else. If I’m with a customer and I don’t like him then I just think about shopping.

My phone rang while I was there. It was Oliver telling me that I had a two-hour booking for two o’clock. It was a customer I had seen twice before. His name is Klaus which is a German name but he is English. He smokes a lot which I don’t like but he always tips me and he makes me laugh. Klaus like me to massage him with baby oil and then to give him oral. He likes me because I don’t use a condom for oral.. He says a lot of girls say they have to use a condom for oral but that it doesn’t feel so good. I understand that. I think if I was a man I wouldn’t want oral sex with a condom. Klaus never wants sex with me. He has a wedding ring so I think he is scared to have sex with a working girl. I gave Klaus my phone number but he never calls me or sends me texts. I think maybe he loves his wife.

After Klaus had gone I phoned Oliver. I always phone Oliver when a customer arrives and when he leaves. That way Oliver knows that I am okay and also he can write down how long the customer was with me. Oliver said I had another customer coming at four-fifteen which meant that I only had fifteen minutes to shower and get myself ready. The customer’s name was Eric but it was only when I opened the door that I recognised him. I had seen him before, he was the customer with the very big dick. Actually I was quite pleased to see him. I hadn’t had sex with Klaus and the night before I had been with Robert and he never wants sex. I know it sounds funny but I actually wanted sex.

He had booked me for an hour. I gave him a beer and we sat on the sofa. I was quite excited because I knew how big he was and I kept rubbing his trousers and teasing him but really I was teasing myself. I unzipped his trousers and gave him oral, really softly and slowly but being careful not to make him come. He really is very big, so big that I have to open my mouth really wide and be careful not to bite him with my teeth! Then I gave him a bubble bath and made love to him in the bath. First it actually hurt a bit because he is so big but then when I was more relaxed it felt good. I actually came it felt so good but he didn’t and then we went into the bedroom. I think he was a bit surprised because I really did want sex with him and I was moaning a lot because really it did feel good. Actually most of the time I had my eyes closed. I wanted sex but I didn’t really want to see Eric. It didn’t really matter who it was, it was just the feeling that I wanted. I am not sure if that makes sense but that is how I felt.

Afterwards I asked him for his phone number and he laughed and asked me if I really liked him and I said I wasn’t sure if I liked him but I liked his dick and he laughed a lot. He gave me his number. After he had gone I felt a bit mixed up. I’m not doing this job to feel good, I am doing it to make money. I don’t understand why I enjoyed it with him. I’m not sure if I should enjoy it, I should be professional. I think it’s not a good idea to enjoy sex with a customer, not really.

Then Oliver phoned to say that Simon had booked me for three hours and that he would be coming at eight o’clock. I laughed because the first time I had seen Simon was the first time that I had seen Eric. Simon is a good customer but making love to him is no fun, there is no feeling at all and I always worry that the condom will slip off. Also, Simon keeps asking him if I will be his girlfriend but I don’t want to be his girlfriend. Eric is quite funny and he likes sex with me, but that is all he wants from me and actually I think that is better.

Simon came with two DVDs to watch and a pizza with pineapple on it because I had said that I liked pizza with pineapple. We watched a movie called The Departed with Leonardo DiCaprio which was great and then we went into the bedroom. I actually didn’t want to have sex with Simon so I gave him a massage and oral and told him I wanted him to come in my mouth, which he did. He asked me if any other customers came in my mouth and I said no, never, and that made him happy. When he went he kissed me and said he loved me, which is crazy because he can’t really love me, I am a working girl.

Before I went to sleep I sent him a text saying that I missed him, then I sent the same text to Eric and Klaus and six other customers, and a text to Robert saying ‘I hope I dream about you, Daddy.’ Then I got a text back from John saying ‘really?’ and I realised that I had sent a text to John at my school by mistake. I didn’t know what to do so I didn’t reply.

Phone call

2007-09-20T02:50:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went with Lek to get her website photographs taken. I went to school first but I was quite tired so I didn’t do much work. I just sat quietly and I think sometimes I fell asleep in class. John saw me and asked me to go for coffee with him and because Lek was there I said okay and we went to Starbucks which is not far from the school. I think John likes Lek because he kept smiling at her. I hope he likes her more than me because then he won’t bother me so much. Actually he shouldn’t be bothering any girls because he is already married.

Lek and I got a taxi to the photographers and Cat was already waiting. Cat had some very sexy outfits for Lek and she got her to try them on. There was a schoolgirl’s uniform with a tartan skirt and a tight white shirt, a nurse’s outfit like the one I have, white bra and suspenders that looked really good, a black bra and suspenders set like I have, a red dress that showed off her breasts, and a body suit made of fishnet material that showed off all her body. It was funny because I thought Lek would be shy but she wasn’t at all and she walked around like a model and made us all laugh. She has a very good body. She is quite short, about five feet two, I think, and a very small waist so that her breasts look quite big.

Cat said Lek should buy all the clothes because they looked so sexy, and that Lek could owe her the £450 they cost and another £200 for the photographs. That is £650 that Lek owes Cat already. That means she will have to have sex seven times to pay back the money. And Cat said she was going to show her an apartment near Marble Arch that cost £1,800 a month. Cat said she would pay for the deposit and the first month’s rent. Lek didn’t seem worried at all. Actually I think she will be very good at this job.

Something very strange happened while Thomas was taking the photographs. Cat was helping him get Lek to look sexy, and while they were busy Cat’s mobile phone rang. Well, it didn’t ring because it was set to silent but it flashed and the name of the caller came up. It was Kung. Now Kung is a common name in Thailand. It can be a name for a girl or for a boy. Actually it is not a real name, it is a nickname. It means Prawn. It could have been anyone called Kung phoning Cat, but I got a very strange feeling, like when you know that something bad is going to happen. When the phone stopped flashing I checked the number and do you know what? It was my boyfriend. It was my Kung calling Cat. How could he know about Cat? He doesn’t know what job I am doing, he doesn’t know that I work for Cat’s agency. Why would he call Cat? And why wouldn’t he tell me that he knows Cat? I was very worried. A bit scared, actually.

Then Cat came over and I tried to smile because I didn’t want her to know how worried I was. Cat said she had an idea. She said that I should let Thomas take some photographs of me and Lek together. She said we were both sexy girls and that we would get more business if we worked together. Lek said she was happy so I said okay, but it meant that I had to pay another £200 for the photographs. I found it difficult to look sexy in the pictures because I was so worried about the phone call and Thomas kept scolding me.

After Thomas had taken the pictures, Cat took Lek to see the apartment in Marble Arch and I went home in a taxi. I was busy all day which was good because it stopped me thinking about the phone call. Kung called me five times and I ignored him but he called again and I answered. He was asking for more money and I said I would send him some by Western Union but I didn’t tell him that I knew he had phoned Cat. Something is wrong but I do not know what it is.

I had four incall customers between two o’clock and eight o’clock, two for one hours and two for ninety minutes, then Oliver phoned to say that Robert wanted me for four hours. I was so happy that I was going to see Robert because he is kind and gentle and I don’t have to have sex with him. It was a good day. I earned £1,440 and I get to keep £960 plus I got some tips. I didn’t get home until three o’clock in the morning and I was so tired but I couldn’t sleep. I was thinking too much.

KhunThaksin

2007-09-19T01:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I saw some photographs of Khun Thaksin, the former Prime Minister of Thailand, with his family in London. In one of the pictures you can see the big house he has brought in London. It is much bigger than the house I am building in Udon Thani and because his house is in London I am sure that it has cost many millions of pounds.

Actually, the photographs made me a bit sad. He is a very rich man and rich people can do anything in this world, especially in Thailand. Poor people can do nothing. Khun Thaksin was a policeman and then he had a mobile phone company and then he owned a satellite and then he was Prime Minister and he was very, very rich. He was so rich that one day he lost a million baht in a briefcase when he was in McDonalds in Moscow, can you believe that? Most people in Thailand would have to work for many years to get a million baht, which is about £15,000. The Army had a coup because they didn’t like the way he was running the country so now he lives in London. But in the pictures he looks very happy, and so does his family. His daughters are very lucky. They will never have to work in a job they do not like. I am sure they will never have to do my job, that is for sure!

My father is a very poor man. And so is my mother. My father only went to school until he was twelve and then he worked as a farmer and then he worked in construction until he hurt his back. Now he cannot work and he stays at home. I think if Khun Thaksin had been my father then my life would have been very different. But I was born into a poor family, and in Thailand if you are born into a poor family you stay poor for your whole life. Even if I had got my Masters Degree and a good job in Bangkok I would only have earned about 30,000 baht a month, which is less than £500. No matter how hard I worked I could never be as rich as Khun Thaksin. Only the children of rich people can get rich in Thailand. In many ways life in Thailand is not fair. Rich people can do what they like. Rich people almost never go to prison in Thailand. Even if they kill somebody! But poor people go to prison all the time.

I am not saying I am unhappy with my mother and father. I am not. I love them so much and they took very good care of me when I was little. But now I have to take care of them. That is one of the reasons I am doing this job, to send money to my parents. But if I could earn good money in Thailand, then I would not have to do this job in London. I think Khun Thaksin should have done more to help the poor people in Thailand, people like my mother and father. Now he and his family have a great life in England and my family are still poor. That is not fair. I hope his daughters realise how lucky they are to have a rich man for their father. They will never have to sell themselves the way that I have to sell myself.

Policeman

2007-09-18T01:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday a policeman came to talk to me. He was actually quite nice but when he first said who he was I was crying and begging him not to take me to jail. Looking back it was quite funny but at the time I was really upset. He had booked me for one hour’s incall at two o’clock and Oliver said his name was Neil. He was about ten minutes late. He was about thirty, tall with very dark brown hair and blue eyes and he was wearing a suit and carrying a briefcase. He looked like a businessman. I was wearing my white vinyl nurse’s outfit and white high heels and I looked really cute. I kissed him on the cheek and asked him if he wanted a drink and he said he’d have an orange juice. He sat down on the sofa and when I took him his drink he opened a wallet and showed me his card and said that he was a police officer. I was so shocked I dropped the orange juice and it went all over the floor. Some of it splashed on his trousers. That’s when I started crying. I begged him not to put me in jail or to send me back to Thailand. Tears were running down my face and I was shaking.

He said that it was okay, he wasn’t there to arrest me. He told me to sit down and then he got a cloth from the kitchen and cleaned up the orange juice. He said that worked for the Clubs and Vice Squad who are the police who investigate working girls in London. I started crying again and he said he was there because he wanted to help me and the other girls at the agency. He took out some photographs to show me. He said that a man had been robbing working girls, beating them up and stealing their money. One of the girls was still in hospital, he said.

Some of the photographs were from CCTV cameras but they weren’t very clear, just a man in a padded jacket with a baseball cap so you couldn’t see his face. One of the photographs was a computer picture of what the man looked like. He was black with very short hair and a flat nose. The policeman asked me if it looked like any of my customers and I said no because I never saw black men. He gave me a folder containing copies of the photographs and he gave me some business cards with his telephone number on and asked me if I’d show the rest of the girls at the agency the pictures and if anyone recognised the man to give him a call.

I was so relieved that I wanted to kiss him. I started crying again, but this time because I was so happy that he wasn’t going to put me in prison. I asked him why he hadn’t spoken to Oliver and he said that usually the people who ran the agencies didn’t want to talk to the police. They were scared that the police wanted to put them out of business. I asked him if it was true that the bosses of the agency could be sent to prison and he said yes because they were living off the earnings of prostitutes. But he said that usually the police didn’t bother about the bosses of the agencies unless they were using illegal immigrants or they were abusing the girls. I said that actually Oliver was a nice man.

Neil said that I should always check on the CCTV camera that I could see a customer’s face. The building kept tapes of the CCTV pictures so if someone was going to steal he wouldn’t risk showing his face. I said that I always did that. I actually don’t think I will have a problem because I won’t ever see a black man. But I know that Alice and Nancy don’t care and they will see anybody, even Indians.
Neil seemed like a nice man. I asked him if it was true that working girls in their own flats weren’t breaking the law and he said that it was. Providing the neighbours didn’t complain he said the police didn’t bother about girls in flats. If there were more than one girl and a maid then the police might say that it was a brothel, but even then they wouldn’t do anything unless somebody complained. Sometimes the police helped immigration if they wanted to round up illegal immigrants. I said that all the girls at our agency had visas, but that was a lie because several of the girls including Alice and Nancy have overstayed. Then Neil said he was going to go. I asked him if he was going to pay me and he said he wasn’t, which I didn’t think was fair because I would have to pay Oliver his commission which was £50. But I didn’t say anything, I just smiled and said goodbye.

After he had gone I phoned Sandra and told her what had happened. She said it wouldn’t be a good idea to tell Oliver because he wouldn’t be happy that I had been talking to a policeman. She said it would be better if we showed the pictures to the girls. I think she might be right. I asked her if she could pay me back some of the money she owed me and she said she hadn’t been very busy on Monday but maybe she could pay me back something by the end of the week. She said she was short of money because Belinda hadn’t paid her back but I think it’s because she is giving all her money to her boyfriend.

Plane crash

2007-09-17T05:23:00.000-07:00

Everyone at the Sloane Square flat was talking about the plane crash in Phuket. A lot of people were killed, I think more than eighty. There were a lot of Thais on the plane but all the English television news seemed to care about was the farangs who were killed. They did not seem to care about the Thai people.

Candy was very worried because she comes from Phuket and her sister often flies to and from Bangkok. She phoned home and her sister was okay so everyone in her family was very happy. Some farang from Ireland said he wouldn’t fly any more in Thailand and that he would get the bus from Phuket to Bangkok. I think he is very stupid because the busses in Thailand are much more dangerous than the planes. A lot of people die when busses crash because the drivers take drugs and drink beer and drive too fast. I am always scared when I go on a bus in Thailand but I am never scared on a plane.

Alice was the best earning girl so she was very happy. She has £2,300 for Oliver. I had £1,900 for him which is the same as Sandra. That meant that Sandra had £3,800 for herself but she didn’t say anything about paying me back the money she owed me, which annoyed me a bit. Nancy had exactly £1,000 for Oliver and she didn’t say anything about paying me back the £2,200 she owed me. I don’t think that is fair because both of them played cards and they both lost a lot of money. It seems to me that they should pay back what they owe before they gamble. But I did not say anything because they are my friends. Candy had £1,400 for Oliver, Wandy had £1,250 and Vicky had £1,100. Rachel only had £900 because her pictures didn’t go up on the website until Tuesday and Cat said the pictures didn’t look good. I think Rachel is quite pretty but Cat said Thomas had made her look a bit like a ladyboy in the photographs so customers might be worried that she was a man! Everyone laughed but I felt a bit sorry for Rachel. Actually, Candy looks more like a ladyboy but she has lots of customers. Some of the agencies actually have ladyboys working for them. I do not understand why a man would want to have sex with a ladyboy. If they are gay then why don’t they want to be with a man? And if they are normal, they would want to be with a girl, wouldn’t they? I don’t know who would want to have sex with a ladyboy.

Lek stared at all the money like it was a dream. She said she had never seen so much money at one time. She kept asking questions about what it was like to be a working girl, and Cat said they could go and take photographs on Wednesday if she wanted. Lek said she would but she wanted to know if they could hide her face. Oliver said no because customers thought that if a girl hid her face it was because she was ugly. He said Lek didn’t have to worry because no one in Thailand ever saw the websites. Cat said Lek should have a working name so we all talked about it and decided on Laura. Cat said she would lend Lek some money for clothes and for a new apartment, same as she did when I started work. I hope that Lek realises that once she has the apartment and the clothes she has no choice, she will have to do this job so that she can pay back Cat and Oliver. In a way it is a trap. But I think she really wants to do the job. I know she really wants the money.

Manchester City played during the day and they won 1-0 against Aston Villa but we didn’t care really because there are no Thai players playing for the team. Khun Thaksin said that Thai players would play for the team when he bought it but he was wrong. I think he thinks he can do anything because he is rich but England is not the same as Thailand. In Thailand rich people can do anything they want, but in England everyone is treated the same. England is more fair than Thailand, I think.

Lek

2007-09-16T02:02:00.000-07:00

Sandra and I took Lek to Chinatown for dim sum yesterday. We went shopping first. We went to the Karen Millen shop in Regents Street and I bought a leather jacket for £350 and a really cute dress for £160. I love Karen Millen’s clothes, she really knows what makes a girl look good, especially an Asian girl. I do not think there is a Karen Millen shop in Thailand but she should open one because all the Thai girls I know love her clothes. Then we went to the Karen Millen shop in South Moulton Street because sometimes they have different styles and I bought a shirt for £120 and Sandra bought a handbag and a pair of shoes. Lek thought the clothes looked really nice but she said she didn’t have enough money so Sandra bought her a black jacket and said she could pay her back sometime. Then we went to Harvey Nichols because Sandra wanted to buy some perfume. I have a lot of perfume already but I bought some really nice bubble bath.

Then we went to Chinatown and I showed Lek the shop where I buy my phonecards. She bought one of the £25 phone cards. She says she phones her mother every day. Then we went to Sandra’s favourite restaurant and she ordered dim sum for us. She ordered a lot and Lek said that maybe we shouldn’t order so much because she didn’t have a lot of money. Sandra laughed and said not to worry, she would pay.

Sandra was very clever. She kept saying how expensive London was and how the people who worked in restaurants earned very little money. She knew that Lek worked in a Chinese restaurant. Lek said that it was hard work and that she never had enough money. The owner of the restaurant where she worked kept all the tips for herself so Lek only had her wages and she was only paid £8 an hour. Sandra laughed and said she earned £100 an hour. Lek wanted to know how Sandra earned £100 an hour and Sandra explained about the agency. It was funny because I realised it was what she’d told me, the time she and her boyfriend had come to see me at my restaurant in Camden. She said that it was easy work, that you spent time with wealthy farangs and were nice to them, that you got to live in a nice apartment and go to nice hotels and wear nice clothes. Lek had some questions, but I could tell that she was interested. Then she asked me if I did the same job, and I said that I did. She asked me what it was like, sleeping with farangs, and I said that actually it was sometimes good fun.

Lek said she wanted to try. I asked her if she was sure she could do it and she said that actually she had done things for money when she was a student in Sara Buri. She said there was a road in Sar Buri where students waited for men. Men would drive up and the girls would get in the car and they would drive somewhere quiet and the girl would give the man oral sex for 500 baht or maybe 1,000 baht. Sometimes the girls would have sex with the man but Lek said she never did, she just did oral. She said she was sixteen when she did it the first time because she wanted a new mobile phone and her father wouldn’t give her enough money. She said a lot of her classmates were doing it, too. It was easy money. I was so surprised because her father was a policeman but she said it was his fault really because he was so stingy with money. Sandra said she could come with us to the Sloane Square flat on Sunday to meet Oliver and Cat and they could talk to her about working for the agency.

Then we got a taxi back to Bayswater. Lek had to get ready for work and Sandra came back to my apartment with me. She said she was sure that Lek would do really well as an escort girl. She went into my bedroom and saw that I had done what she suggested and hung a mirror at the end of the bed. It was a good idea because it made customers horny to see themselves making love to me and when they are horny they come quicker. Sandra said she had put a television and a DVD player in her bedroom as well so that she could play sexy movies because that made customers horny, too.

Sandra said that she was really angry at Belinda. Belinda had either turned off her mobile phone or she had thrown away the Sim card. And she hadn’t paid Sandra any money for two weeks. Sandra asked me if I would go with her to talk to Belinda and I said that maybe I would next week. Actually I do not want to get involved. If Sandra has a problem with Belinda then that is her problem. I do not want to get into a fight with Belinda. In fact I do not want to get into a fight with anyone. I just want to earn money. I understand that Sandra is worried that Belinda might not pay her back, but that’s not my problem.

Then I was really surprised because Sandra asked me if I would lend her some money. Sandra earns a lot of money and has a lot of regular customers. She is never the top earning girl at the agency, but she is never the worst either. And she has been working for a long time so she should have saved a lot of money by now. Sandra said she needed £3,000 and could I help her. I asked her if she had a problem and she said that it wasn’t really her who needed the money, it was her boyfriend. She has been helping him pay for his Porsche and he didn’t have any money this month. I couldn’t believe it. She was helping him pay for his car? What sort of boyfriend is that? Sandra always said how rich her boyfriend was and how well-dressed he was and how much he spent on presents for her, but now I think that maybe it’s her money that’s paying for it all. I think she is crazy but she is my friend so I said I would help her so I got £3,000 for her. Actually I have a lot of money in my apartment. More than £15,000. I send a lot back to Kung and some I post to my mum in Udon Thani but the rest I keep in my room. I don’t have a bank account in London and I’m not sure how to open one. I am worried that they might ask questions about where I am getting my money from.

Anyway, I keep my money in envelopes under the carpet behind the sofa. I don’t think anyone will ever find it there. I put one thousand pounds in each envelope and I lay them flat under the carpet. I think it’s a safe hiding place. I gave three envelopes to Sandra and she said she would pay me back in a week or two. I hope she doesn’t forget.

Cocaine

2007-09-15T01:46:00.000-07:00

The new pictures of me and Nancy went up on the website on Wednesday night and yesterday we had two customers who wanted to see us together. The first was a man called Elliot who wanted an hour’s incall so I went around to Nancy’s apartment because hers is a bit bigger than mine. This time she had on a sexy black plastic dress with holes cut out for her breasts and I was wearing red stockings and suspenders that I had bought from Anne Summers. Chris was in the apartment and he said that we both looked really sexy. Actually I didn’t like him looking at me. I know that sounds a bit silly because customers see me naked all the time but he isn’t a customer, he’s Nancy’s kik, and I don’t think that he should be looking at me. Nancy didn’t mind, though, so I didn’t say anything, but I put a towel around me and told Nancy that I was a bit cold.

The downstairs bell rang at just before two o’clock and we looked at the customer on the CCTV and then Chris left. Before he went he asked Nancy for some money and she gave him £50. I really don’t understand Nancy. Not only does she FFF but she gives him money, too.

Elliot was about forty years old and quite thin with blonde hair that I think was dyed. He smelt of cigarettes and I think he had been drinking whisky. We sat on the sofa and both kissed him. Nancy has a big shower so we both went into the shower with him. We both made sure that he was really clean and then Nancy knelt down and gave him oral sex while I kissed him on the mouth. He tasted quite bad, really, because of the cigarettes. Nancy was really clever. She got him really hard and then she looked up at him and said that she wanted him to come in her mouth. Then she started to moan and stroke his legs as she sucked him and then sure enough he came! But then she really shocked me because she swallowed. I never swallow when the customer comes, I always spit it out into a tissue or go to the bathroom. But she just looked at him to make sure that he was watching and then she swallowed and smiled and thanked him. He seemed to really like that. Afterwards I asked her if she always swallowed and she said that she did. She said that it was better than spitting it out because if you swallowed it quickly you hardly tasted anything but if you held it in your mouth then of course you tasted it. She said that swallowing was safer, too. It was almost impossible to catch anything from oral sex, but just in case, swallowing meant that any germs were killed by the acid in your stomach. That actually made a lot of sense to me. I was spitting out because I thought that was safer but in fact swallowing would kill the germs faster so in future I think I will try to swallow.

We dried Elliott and took him into the bedroom. We gave him a massage but he couldn’t get hard again. That was why Nancy was so clever. A lot of men when they get a bit old can only come one time, unless they cheat and take Viagra of course! So when he came in her mouth in the shower, that was all he could do. We just gave him a massage in the bedroom and then he went. He didn’t tip us, but that was okay. He had paid us £300 and he hadn’t even had sex with either of us. I wish we had more customers like that. I don’t mind having sex with customers and sometimes it can be fun, but when you are busy it can hurt a bit if you do it too much.

After Elliott had gone Chris came back. He started kissing Nancy and said that he wanted to go into the bedroom with her. Nancy laughed and said that he was always horny but she went with him anyway. I went home and showered and watched a movie. Our next booking together was at nine o’clock, outcall to the Landmark Hotel, which is not far from Bayswater. The Landmark is owned by a Thai businessman, Nancy said, and a lot of people from Thailand stay there. I said I hoped we didn’t get a Thai customer but Nancy said that Oliver would never take a booking from a Thai man. Can you imagine how terrible it would be if it was someone who recognised me? I would die!

Oliver phoned me to say that I had a customer at four o’clock, incall for an hour and a half. His name was Tim and he was quite good-looking, about thirty years old, I think. He said that he had been to Thailand many times. He said he had been to Pattaya most but that he really liked Phuket, where the beaches are good. Phuket is too expensive for most Thai people, it is mainly farangs who go there. Tim said that he wanted a Thai girlfriend but that all Thai girls cared about was money. That didn’t seem fair to me. Not all Thai girls care about money. We are like girls everywhere, we want a man to love us and take care of us, a man who can make us happy and feel safe. Then he said that all Thai girls lie and that’s not true at all. I think maybe Tim just talks to bargirls and of course they will lie because they want his money. Thai people have a saying – Farang Ru Mak Mai Dee. It means that the farang who knows too much isn’t a good thing. I think Tim thinks he knows too much about Thai people but really he doesn’t. I didn’t like it when he said bad things about Thai people. I kept smiling at him and being cute with him but really I hated him. He asked me if I would give him my phone number but I told him that my agency wouldn’t let me do that. He had sex with me twice and I pretended to come both times but really I didn’t like being with him at all.

Nancy came around to my apartment at half past seven and we got a taxi to the Landmark Hotel. She was wearing a nice dress and Gucci high heels and like me she had a Louis Vuitton bag. When we got to the hotel she got out first and waited until I paid. I don’t think Nancy has much money because she gives so much of it to Chris. I hope she remembers that she owes me £2,200.

Nobody said anything at reception and we went up in the lift to the sixth floor. The customer’s name was Richard and he had booked us for two hours. Richard was English but he worked for a company in Switzerland. He worked for a big bank actually. He lives in Zurich with his wife and two children. He was very funny and made me and Nancy laugh a lot. Nancy took off her coat and underneath she was wearing just panties and suspenders and stockings. She does have really good breasts, they are very big and because she is young they are very firm. Richard looked very pleased when he saw her breasts. I took off my coat and showed him what I was wearing – a very short black dress with a lacy bit at the top so that you can see lots of cleavage. I didn’t have a bra underneath. Richard said he wanted to call the agency and book us for an extra two hours, so he would be booking us for four hours in total. We said that he could, but then he said that if he did that he’d need some help. We didn’t understand what he meant and he laughed and said that he’d need some cocaine. He asked us if we knew where we could get some. Nancy said she didn’t and she asked me if I did. At first I was going to say I didn’t, but then I thought about the money. Richard would be paying me for four hours outcall which would be £690 for me and £690 for Nancy. I said I knew someone who could get cocaine.

I went into the bathroom to phone Vince. I had already put his name in my mobile phone and he answered right away. I asked him if he could bring some cocaine and he asked how much I wanted and I said I didn’t know, how much did people usually buy? He said he’d sell me some for £300 but that I should tell the customer it was costing £400. That way I would make a profit of £100. He asked me where I was and when I said I was at the Landmark he said he didn’t want to go into the hotel but that he would call me when he got there and he would meet me outside.

Richard said £400 was fine and he gave me the money. We went to the bedroom and I gave him oral for ten minutes while Nancy kissed his nipples. I was just about to put a condom on him when my phone rang. It was Vince. I got dressed and went downstairs and gave him £300 and he gave me an envelope. He told me not to open it until I was back in the room. At first I thought maybe he was trying to con me but he wasn’t. I gave the envelope to Richard and he was really pleased when he saw how much cocaine there was. He went into the bathroom and came out with a razor blade and a small mirror and he put some of the coke into two lines. Then he rolled up a fifty pound note and sniffed one line up each nostril, then shivered and said it was really good coke. He asked me and Nancy if we wanted some and of course I said no because I never take drugs. But I was really surprised because Nancy said yes! Richard made two more lines and gave her the rolled-up note and Nancy sniffed it up.

Then we went into the bedroom and Richard made love to us both. It was crazy, Nancy was yelling and screaming and really seemed to be enjoying it. Richard was laughing and we used about half a dozen condoms because he kept switching between us.

It took him almost an hour to come, then he got a bottle of champagne from the fridge and he and Nancy drank it. I had a Coke. The drink, not the drug, of course! Then Richard asked if Nancy and I would do a lesbian show for him so we did while he sat and drank champagne. Nancy is really good at pretending to be a lesbian. She got me to lick her pussy and she kept squealing and moaning and grabbing my hair. Actually, I am not sure that she was pretending, I think she liked it a lot. Then Richard got onto the bed and put some of the cocaine on Nancy’s pussy and told me to lick it. I said I didn’t want to but Nancy spoke to me in Thai and said it would be okay and it would make him happy and that it would be fun. She said it wouldn’t affect me. I did what she said and licked her and I got cocaine on my tongue. It didn’t have much of a taste, actually, but it tingled a bit and after a minute or two my lips went a bit numb. Nancy started to go a bit crazy and I think she actually came while I was licking her.

Then Richard and Nancy had more cocaine and Richard opened another bottle of champagne. They were getting a bit silly and speaking really fast and they were kissing each other a lot. Then Richard put some cocaine on his dick and asked me to give him oral sex. Nancy said that I should and I did because I had already tasted it. I kept sucking him until he came in my mouth and I swallowed. It was the first time I had ever swallowed with a customer and it was okay. Nancy was right, it was better than spitting.

I don’t think the cocaine affected me, not really. I felt my heart pounding a bit but it’s not like I saw things. We made love again, all three of us, in so many positions that I can’t remember what we did. I know one thing, though. One time I saw Nancy making love to Richard without a condom. I am sure. I was really shocked. That is so dangerous. He had been making love to me and then he said he wanted her and he took off the condom but before he could put on another one she had got on top of him. I think he came inside her, too.

When the four hours was up I was so tired that I don’t remember getting home. I know that I sent Oliver a text message saying that I couldn’t do any more work that night and I fell asleep with my clothes on and slept for more than ten hours!

Boyfriends

2007-09-13T02:22:00.000-07:00

I don’t understand why men think they can have a working girl as a girlfriend. They look at a website and choose a girl because they want to have sex with her, right? So they must understand that the girl is selling sex for money and that that’s their job. So why then do they think that the girl would want to be their girlfriend? If I was looking for a boyfriend or a husband, I wouldn’t be working as an escort. I work as an escort because I want to make a lot of money quickly.

When I worked as a waitress in a Thai restaurant, lots of guys wanted to be my boyfriend. I could always tell the ones that wanted to ask me out. Usually the first time they would come in a group, but they would smile a lot and maybe ask my name. Then they would come in again, probably with someone else, and this time they would give me a business card and tell then that they wanted me to call them. I never did, not even if the guy was good looking. Then they would start coming in on their own and eat alone, trying to talk to me whenever I went by their table. Then finally maybe they would ask me out for a meal or to go to see a movie, but I always said no. I had to work six nights a week and I never finished before one o’clock in the morning. Then during the day I was at school. I didn’t have time for a boyfriend. Once I said no to a guy, he would stop coming in. The manager of the restaurant noticed that a lot of customers were coming in to the restaurant because I was there and he said that I should flirt with them, but even if I did they always stopped coming in once I turned them down.

I understood why guys would ask me out when I was a waitress, but I didn’t understand why they thought I would want to go for a meal as a date, because I worked in a restaurant! But I don’t understand why my customers now think that I would want to go out with them. Simon keeps sending me messages asking me if I want to go and see a movie with him and I just ignore him. The first time he asked I said that he’d have to book me through the agency but he said that he wanted to go on a real date. He doesn’t seem to get it, booking me through the agency would be a real date. He could book me for three hours outcall and we could go and see a movie and that would be a date. He knows I’m working, so why does he think that I would go out with him for free? I’m not like Nancy. I would never FFF.

A lot of customers ask me out now. Probably four or five a week. It’s usually guys who have been to see me three or four times. Sometimes they ask me out straight away, the first time they see me. They have sex with me and then they ask me if I want to go and see a movie some time. How stupid is that? But most of the ones who ask me out wait until the third or fourth time. Usually they bring me a present, some flowers or chocolates or perfume. Then they sweet talk me, then they ask me out. I always say that I’d love to go out with them but that the agency won’t let me and then they always say that the agency needn’t know. Do they think I’m stupid? Sometimes after I’ve turned them down I never see them again. But others, like Simon, keep on asking. They don’t give up. In a way it’s good because they’re regular customers but it can get a bit boring when they keep asking and asking and asking.

Even if I was looking for a boyfriend or a husband, why would a customer think that I would want him? Why would I want a boyfriend who visits prostitutes? If he met me through the agency then he’s probably been to see lots of agency girls. I don’t want a man who visits prostitutes. And if let a customer be my boyfriend, how could I ever trust him? I’d know that if he ever got bored with me he’d start looking at the agency websites again. No, I would never want a customer as a boyfriend. And I don’t understand why a customer would want an agency girl as his wife. Surely every time he looked at her he’d think about all the men she’d slept with. Do you know, if a girl works for an agency for one year she has probably had sex with more than five hundred men? Why would a man want a wife who has had sex with five hundred men? That’s just crazy. No, I will wait until I have finished doing this job before I look for a husband. And I will never, ever, ever, ever, tell him that I worked as an escort girl. That will be a secret for ever.

New pictures

2007-09-12T03:14:00.000-07:00

Cat took me and Nancy to get new photographs taken yesterday. I went to see Nancy first. Chris was there and he asked if he could come with us but Nancy said no, she didn’t want Cat to know that she had a kik. When Cat phoned to say that she was outside in the taxi, Chris asked Nancy if she would give him some money and she gave him £100. I don’t understand why she gives him money. He’s supposed to be her boyfriend. I think she is crazy to have FFF with him but she is even crazier to give him money. Nancy told me not to tell Cat about Chris but I knew that already. I don’t think Cat or Oliver would be happy to know that she had a boyfriend and that he was the reason she wasn’t working very hard.

It was Thomas the gay guy who took our photographs. I think he takes all the pictures for the agency. Cat said we had to pay £200 each for the new photographs. Nancy said she didn’t have any money so she asked me if I would lend it to her and I said okay. While we were changing, I heard Thomas talking to Cat about Belinda. Thomas said that Belinda had phoned her asking if he would let her have copies of the photographs he had taken of her. She wanted them on a disc but she didn’t say why she wanted them. Thomas wanted to know if it was okay to give her the pictures but Cat said that it wasn’t okay because the pictures belonged to the agency. Actually that isn’t fair because the girls have to pay for their own photographs so really they belong to us. But I think Cat knows that Belinda wants the photographs because she wants her own website. I think Belinda can’t take new photographs now because her eye looks so bad. I could see that Cat was a bit angry and she told Thomas he must never give the photographs to Belinda and if she wanted him to take new photographs then he had to say no. I think Thomas will do what Cat says because she gives him a lot of business.

Thomas took a lot of photographs of me and Nancy together. Some of the pictures were very sexy, with me and Nancy kissing and touching each other. In one of them I am on my hands and knees wearing the spiky dog collar and she is holding my lead like I am her dog. Sometimes it felt funny and we giggled a lot until Thomas scolded us and said that we had to be professional. Some of the things he made us do seemed silly at the time but when we saw the photographs we realised what he had meant. Nancy and me did look very sexy together, like we really enjoyed being with each other. In half the photographs we are actually naked but you can’t see our pussies! Cat said it was okay to show breasts but that we couldn’t show pussies. In Thailand you can’t even show breasts on television or in movies, they use a computer to blur it so that you can’t see anything. There are lots of things you are not allowed to see on Thai television – like people smoking or pointing a gun at someone’s head. Even in cartoons! I am serious. When people smoke cigarettes in The Simpsons the government blurs the picture so you can’t see what they are doing. I think that is crazy!

Afterwards we went to Chinatown to eat duck noodle soup, which I really like. Cat said the new photographs would go on the website tomorrow and that she was sure that we would get a lot of business. I asked her if there might be a problem with me and Nancy working together because in England the law is that girls must work alone. She asked me who I had been talking to and I said no one, just that a customer had said that working girls weren’t doing anything wrong if they were alone but that two girls in one flat was a brothel and that the police didn’t like that. Cat said I wasn’t to worry. Oliver knows his customers and he wouldn’t send a new customer to see two girls, only customers that he knows.

After we had eaten our soup we went to buy phonecards. Phoning Thailand from England is expensive if you use your mobile phone, but you can buy international phone cards that let you do it cheaply, just a few pence a minute. Sandra had showed me a shop in Wardour Street where a Chinese man sells very cheap cards. He has one Thailand card which is £20 but you get £5 free and he sells them for just £12. So you get £25 of calls for £12 and the £25 lasts you about one thousand minutes, I think! I need a lot of cards because Kung phones me every day and he always asks me to call him back and sometimes we talk for more than an hour. All he talks about is money. Money, money, money. Money for the bank, money for the builders, now he wants to buy more land next to the house and then he wants to put more soil on the land to stop it flooding, and he wants to change the marble floors in the bathrooms, and now he seems to expect me to pay for it all. I sent him another £1,000 by Western Union, but he says that it’s not enough. I don’t think Kung loves me any more, I think he only cares about my money. I am supposed to be his Mia Noy which means that he is supposed to take care of me, not the other way around!

Cat said she was going to see Oliver so Nancy and I went back home in a taxi together. In the taxi Nancy asked me if I would lend her some money. I asked her why and she said that she was just short of money this week because she had paid her rent and her council tax. I asked her how much she wanted and she said £2,000. That seemed like a lot of money but she isn’t earning a lot now that she is with Chris so much, and she loses a lot at cards. So I gave her another £2,000 which means that she owes me £2,200. I think it is crazy that a working girl can sleep with men for £150 an hour but then she has to borrow money, but I didn’t say anything. I just hope that she remembers to pay me back.

New Girl

2007-09-11T02:04:00.000-07:00

I lost so much money at the Sloane Square flat on Sunday night. Well actually it was Sunday night and most of Monday. We just kept playing and playing. We didn’t stop playing until after mid-day on Monday which means that we played cards for more than twelve hours. At one point I was up £600 and then I was losing and then I was winning £400 but when we finally finished playing I had lost £1,300. Most of the girls lost money but no one lost as much as me. I don’t know why I’m not lucky any more. Oliver won a lot. He’s always lucky.

A new girl has started working for the agency. Her name is Rachel. At least that is her working name. She is from Surin. She is very pretty with very dark skin and high cheekbones like a lot of girls from Surin. She has a really good body and I think she is the type of girl that farangs like. In Thailand, men prefer girls with white skin and round faces, but farangs seem to like darker skin and long faces. She has a tattoo of a scorpion which is a bit scary. I don’t like tattoos and I would never have one. I think they are ugly. It looks good on Rachel, though. It makes her look exotic. She has only just arrived in London and she paid for her own contract. That means she paid £6,000 in Thailand to get a visa and a ticket and I think it was her agent who fixed up the job with Oliver. She is good fun. She is what we Thai people call San-nuk. San-nuk means fun. She likes to drink and dance and before we played cards she danced sexily while we sang karaoke. She is a very sexy dancer. She told us that she used to dance in a go-go bar called Angel Witch in Nana Plaza. Nana Plaza is a bar area in Bangkok where a lot of prostitutes work. I have never been there but I have heard about it. Rachel said here were more than thirty bars in Nana Plaza and more than five thousand girls working there. Can you believe that? Five thousand girls! They aren’t all go-go dancers like she was but she said that almost all of the girls in Nana Plaza will go with customers. She said Angel Witch was one of the busiest bars in Nana Plaza and that the prettiest girls worked there. She said they all dressed in black and they did sexy shows that got the customers really horny. Rachel said that if a customer wanted to take her out of the bar he would pay about £10 and then he would pay the girl about another £30. That means a customer pays just £40 for sex. I am glad I am not a working girl in Thailand, that’s for sure.

Rachel said she earned lots of money at the bar which is why she was able to save enough money to buy her own contract. She had tried to get a student visa on her own but the Embassy had turned her down because she had no one to sponsor her. She said her plan was to work really hard for one year in London to make enough money to build a house in Surin and then she would go back and work at Angel Witch.

Cat cooked Pad Thai for us and Wanda had brought tubs of Hagan Daas ice cream and Candy had brought strawberries so we had lots to eat. Oliver asked me if I’d enjoyed working with Nancy and Nancy said that she had made me come with her tongue and I was shy and everyone laughed. Oliver said we should get some pictures of me and Nancy for the website because some customers really liked to see two girls together. I said okay, because two girls with one man is half the work, really, and so it’s easy money.

Belinda didn’t come to the flat. I suppose because she hadn’t been working she didn’t have any more for Oliver so she didn’t want to come. I don’t think it was because she was scared of Alice. I don’t think Belinda is scared of anybody. Nancy said that Belinda’s picture is still on the website so that when people phone up for her Oliver tries to get the customer to take another girl. Because of that, Alice was really busy. She had £2,500 for Oliver. I had £2,050 for him and Sandra had a good week as well because she gave £1,900 to Oliver. I think Oliver was giving her a lot of Belinda’s customers, too. Nancy had been working a bit harder so she had £1,250 for Oliver, Wanda earned less because she was having her period so she had just £900 for Oliver. Vicky had £1,600 and Candy had £1,750.

The girls were talking a lot about the Thai footballer, Suree Sukha. Now he can’t play for Manchester City because the British government won’t give him a work permit. Everybody was laughing and saying that Khun Thaksin would be really angry because when he was Prime Minister of Thailand everybody did what he said but now that he lives in England nobody really cares about him, even though he owns Manchester City. Alice said that Khun Thaksin would have to go back to Thailand some time because the Thai Government wanted to ask him about all the money he made while he was Prime Minister. But Oliver said Khun Thaksin he was so rich that he could stay in England as long as he wanted. The English government always allows rich people to stay in their country, even when they are bad people. Sandra said that Suree Sukha should talk to the agents in Thailand, the ones who get visas for working girls. She said that all he had to do was to pay £6,000 and he could buy a visa and a ticket, no problem. Everybody laughed at that. It is true, though. Everyone knows that it is difficult to get a student visa or a tourist visa from the British Embassy, but that if you pay £6,000 then anyone can get a visa. There is a lot of corruption in Thailand, everywhere. Some Thai people who work for the British Embassy get very rich, I think.

I went home in a taxi with Nancy and Sandra. Sandra said she was a bit worried about Belinda and wanted us to go to see her but Nancy and I both said we were too tired. Sandra said we could maybe go around in the week and we said yes. I think she’s a bit worried that Belinda might disappear because if she disappears then Sandra will lose the money she paid to bring Belinda to London.

When I got home I slept almost the whole day but then Oliver phoned just after six o’clock in the evening to tell me that Robert had booked me for four hours. I was so happy. I thought I would give Robert a surprise so I shaved myself, which I have never done before. Between my legs, I mean. Cat said I should do that. She said it turned a lot of men on because it makes you look younger, but also it is much more hygienic and easier to keep clean. It felt funny after I’d done it and it tingled a bit but I put some talcum powder on it and then it felt okay. It looked quite strange because I was used to having hair there! When I was in the bedroom with Robert, after I’d eaten my sandwiches and drunk my milk, I said I had something to show him and I took off my panties. He looked so happy and he stroked me and said what a sweet thing I was, but then he went back to kissing my feet and touching himself. I think he just loves feet. In a way I’d like to see what it was like to make love to him, just once, but I think that might spoil it for him, and I don’t want to spoil it because he is such a good customer.

Overnight

2007-09-09T02:34:00.001-07:00

I had my first overnight job yesterday, and it was Peter from Hong Kong. I was so happy to see him again and happy that he was the first customer that I spent the night with. He is a real gentleman and very kind. Customers usually have to pay the agency £1,200 for an overnight booking, starting at eleven o’clock at night and finishing at eight o’clock in the morning, but Peter had told Oliver that he wanted to take me to dinner so he wanted the date to start earlier, at eight o’clock in the evening. Oliver agreed a price of £1,500. That meant I was getting £1,000 for the night and Oliver was getting £500. Peter gave me the cash as soon as he saw me, all new £50 notes in an envelope with my name on it. He had booked a suite in the Mandarin Oriental again and he looked just as handsome as I remembered him. I think he is about forty-five years old and his hair is greying a bit but really he is my spec. If I was looking for a farang husband then Peter is the type of man I would want. Except of course that he has a wife already.

I was wearing one of my Karen Millen dresses and Gucci high heel shoes and my Kenzo coat. Peter had a present for me – a big bottle of Chanel perfume. Last time I had seen him I had said that I liked Chanel perfume and I was so surprised that he had remembered because it was almost a month ago.

We had dinner in the restaurant which was lovely. The service was unbelievable and everybody was smiling at me. The dress I was wearing shows off my breasts and I had spent ages getting my hair looking good and I knew that I was the prettiest girl in the restaurant. Peter said I was, too. I had a seafood salad to eat which was delicious, as tasty as anything I had ever eaten in Thailand, and Peter had Dover sole. He ordered champagne and even though I usually don’t drink alcohol I had a glass and it was actually quite nice but I did feel a little light-headed.

Peter knows a lot about Thailand. He is based in Hong Kong but his company has offices all over Asia. He said he went to Thailand twice a month and that it was a pity I wasn’t there because he would be able to see me more often. He smiled and said that if I was in Thailand I could be his Mia Noy. I didn’t tell him that I was already a Mia Noy and that really I didn’t want to be anybody’s Mia Noy, I wanted to be a real wife. A Mia Noy is second best and I don't want to be second best.

After dinner we sat in the bar and we talked. Peter was very sweet and made me laugh a lot. His wife is very lucky to have him, I think. We went up to his room at about eleven o’clock and we made love. He made me come again and I knew then that I really did like him. It’s hard to come with somebody if you don’t like them. You can fake it, and I do that a lot with customers because it makes them happy if they think I’ve come, but I can only come with somebody if I like them. I lay curled up in his arms until he went to sleep and then I got up and took my phone into the bathroom. I had my phone turned off while I was with Peter and when I switched it on I had two messages, one from Robert and one from Simon. They both wished me a good night, which was sweet. I sent Robert a message that said ‘Sweet dreams, daddy, I hope I see you soon’ and a message to Simon saying ‘Sleep well, baby.’ I sent Simon’s message to six other customers and then I switched off my phone and went to lie down with Peter again. The bed was so comfortable and he was so warm to lie next to that I fell asleep really quickly.

In the morning we had breakfast in bed and then he made love to me again. He gave me a £100 tip when I left and this time I asked him for his phone number. He seemed surprised but he gave me his Hong Kong number. I was actually quite sorry to go home, I would have been happy to stay longer but he said he had meetings all day starting at nine o’clock and then he was going back to Hong Kong. Back to his wife, I thought, but I didn’t say that. I just kissed him and waved and walked away. I am sure I am younger and prettier than his wife and I am sure that Peter would rather be with me than her.

Two girls

2007-09-08T02:48:00.000-07:00

I went to school again yesterday. The girl from Sara Buri was there and I chatted with her during the break. Her name is Lek and she is twenty-two years old and she comes from a good family. Her father is a policeman and her mother is a doctor but she doesn’t work much now. Lek was complaining that her father was stingy with money and she has to share a room in a house in Kilburn which isn’t very nice. She works in a Chinese restaurant but the people she works for aren’t very nice and they don’t pay her a lot. I want to tell Lek about the agency but I’m not sure what she would say if she found out how I earned my money. I know she likes nice things, though. She says how pretty my clothes are and she always talks about my bags and ask how much they cost. I actually think Lek would do really well as an agency girl. She has really nice breasts and white skin and a pretty face. I might ask her to go out with Sandra and me for dim sum in Chinatown and then maybe Sandra could tell her about the job. I worry a bit that she might tell the people at school what I do but it would be good to have her as a friend. Nancy doesn’t have much time for me these days because she is always with her kik. FFF. Before I used to go to her apartment and sleep with her but now she is usually with Chris so I have to sleep alone, which I don’t like.

Simon came to see me in the evening. He had booked me for three hours this time, and he brought sushi with him and three DVDs – Bad Boys 2, Fantastic Four 2 and Ghost-rider. We ate the sushi and watched Fantastic Four 2 which was good but not as good as the first movie, I think. I really like the guy that plays the Human Torch and Jessica Alba is so hot! Because Simon had booked me for three hours we had time to make love which was okay, but Simon is so small that I always worry about the condom slipping off. I don’t take the pill and I am really scared about getting pregnant. Afterwards he asked me if I would be his girlfriend. He isn’t the first customer to ask that. I always say the same thing. I am not doing this job because I want a boyfriend, I am doing this job because I want to make money. A lot of money. Simon said that he wanted to marry me and take care of me. He said he didn’t like me doing this job and that he wanted me to only make love to him. He wanted me to be his wife and to have children with him, which is sweet, but I don’t want a husband or a boyfriend or another child. I want money. I told Simon that I can earn more than £3,000 a week at the agency so if someone wanted to really take care of me they would have to pay me £150,000 a year. He thought I was joking but I wasn’t. If he was serious about wanting to take care of me and could pay me £150,000 then maybe I might stop work. But I don’t think he can afford that. He wanted to book me for another hour but Oliver had already told me that I had a customer for eleven o’clock so he had to go. Simon seemed quite sad when he left, but that’s not my fault. It’s not as if he met me in a pub or in a shop, he met me because he saw me on the agency’s website and booked me so he can’t complain that I am working as an escort.

The customer who came at eleven was an Arab, I think, but he was very white so I didn’t mind. He was actually quite nice and polite and he showered for a very long time. He didn’t want a bath with me, he just wanted a massage and oral sex. I think he was married. A lot of married men don’t want full sex with a working girl because I think they are scared that they might get sick. Actually we are very careful. I never have sex without a condom. He said he worked in London and that he would come to see me again so I gave him my phone number. He wanted to know if he could call me if he wanted to see me but I told him that he would have to book me through the agency.

Simon left the DVDs behind so I watched Bad Boys 2 which was quite funny and better than Bad Boys 1, I think, but I didn’t understand all the slang even when I was reading the subtitles. Then Oliver phoned me again at two o’clock in the morning and asked me if I would work with Nancy. A customer had booked two girls for two-thirty and he had wanted Nancy and Wanda but Wanda’s period had come so she couldn’t work. At first I said I didn’t want to do it but Oliver said that I would be doing him a big favour and he didn’t want to upset a good customer. He saw girls from the agency every week and was a good tipper. I wasn’t sure if I could do it, but Nancy is my friend so I thought that perhaps it wouldn’t be too bad. I put on my stockings and suspenders and high heels and put my Kenzo coat on top and went to Nancy’s apartment. She was wearing a dress made out of mesh which showed off all her body and high heels. She had lots of lipstick and mascara on and looked very sexy. I told her how shy I was about being with her and a customer and she said not to worry, it was like being a movie star. You just had to pretend. She asked me if I had seen any sexy movies where girls made love to girls and I laughed and said of course not. She put a DVD on her TV and I was so shocked! There were two girls kissing and touching each other, then a man joined in and they were all making love. I watched it with my jaw on the floor! Then the doorbell rang and it was the customer. He didn’t look like the man in the DVD. He was short and a bit fat and I think he had false teeth because they seemed very white. His name was Patrick and he said he was from Belfast, which is in Northern Ireland.

I sat next to him on the sofa while Nancy opened a bottle of wine. He started kissing my breasts and I moaned like I always do because customers like it when they think you are enjoying yourself. I saw Nancy looking at us and smiling and I was a bit shy but I remembered what she said about being a movie star, so I moaned some more and rubbed his leg. Then Nancy brought over three glasses of wine and we said ‘cheers’ and we all drank, except I just sipped because actually I don’t like alcohol. Then Nancy put down her glass and unzipped his trousers and gave him oral sex while he kissed me. He really liked that. Then Nancy sat up and smiled and kissed me. I was so surprised. She put her tongue in my mouth and really kissed me! I pulled away but she spoke to me in Thai and said we should kiss because that made the customer very horny and he would come really quickly. She kissed me again and this time I closed my eyes and kissed her too, then she held my breasts so I touched her breasts as well.

Then Nancy took off his trousers and put on a condom and she got on top of him and made love to him on the sofa while I kissed him. Then he said he wanted to make love to me doggy-style so Nancy changed the condom and I knelt down the sofa while he made love to me from behind. While he was making love to me Nancy slid underneath me and started kissing me and stroking my breasts. I was such a strange feeling because Nancy is a girl and she’s my friend but it felt quite sexy. She is very professional. I thought because she is a young girl she wouldn’t know what to do but she is better than me, that’s for sure.

Patrick wanted to go into the bedroom and this time he made love to Nancy doggy-style and this time she told me to lie under her but to lie the other way around so that I could lick him while he was making love to her. I did it but it felt really strange seeing him moving in and out of her and then Nancy kissed me between the legs. I was so surprised that I squealed and clamped my legs together and she laughed and told me to relax. She kissed me again and put her tongue inside me and kept licking me. Some customers have done that to me before and I quite like it but it was the first time ever in my life that a girl has done that and it felt really strange. Patrick came while he was making love to Nancy and then she stopped licking me and went to shower. I lay on the bed, panting so much that I could hardly breathe. Patrick was grinning and telling me how good we were together, me and Nancy. He asked me if I had worked with Nancy before and I said it was my first time with another girl and he didn’t believe me. When Nancy came out of the shower he asked her if it was true and she said yes, I’d never been with a girl before.

Patrick grinned and said he would give us both £50 each if Nancy could make me come. I thought he was joking but he wasn’t and Nancy said to me in Thai that I could just pretend and it would only take a few minutes and she needed the money. I thought he was crazy and she was crazy as well but I said okay. I lay down on the bed and Nancy lay on top of me and then started kissing me on the lips. Then she kissed me on my breasts and I started to get quite horny even though she is my friend and I knew that she was only acting. Patrick started stroking her and then she started licking me between the legs and Patrick kissed me, telling me that it was okay and that he wanted me to come.

Nancy pushed my legs up so that my feet were on her shoulders and she pushed her tongue deep inside me. Patrick was stroking my breasts and whispering to me and I was moaning and saying ‘yes, baby’ and panting a lot and it was quite funny because I could see how excited Patrick was. But really it was just like the sexy DVD, just acting. After about five minutes I moaned really hard and shuddered and lay still and Patrick asked me if I had come and I sighed and said that I had. It was a lie but it made him happy so that was all right. I think it took less than ten minutes and he gave me £50 and gave Nancy £50 as well. Patrick was happy and said that he wanted to book me and Nancy together again and I said okay but actually it wasn’t too bad. In fact it was easy money and being with Nancy was quite good fun.

Vince

2007-09-06T02:36:00.000-07:00

Vince came to see me again yesterday. It was so funny. He booked me under the name James like he did last time but I remembered him straight away because of his shaved head and the ‘LOVE’ and ‘HATE’ tattoos on his knuckles. He took out his roll of £50 notes and gave me three and then he asked me for a beer. I gave him a can of Carlsberg and we sat on the sofa. I was dressed in stockings and suspenders that I had bought from Anne Summers. He kept frowning and looking around the apartment and eventually he asked me if he’d been there before. I laughed and said yes, he’d come to see me but that he’d been really drunk. He laughed. He had a nice laugh. He looked a bit scary but actually he was a nice man. He was a good kisser, too. We kissed on the sofa for about ten minutes and then we went into the bedroom. I was very surprised at the way he made love. He was very soft and gentle and kept kissing my neck and whispering sweet words.

Afterwards we lay in bed talking. He was quite funny. He sells drugs. He used to sell just cannabis but he said the price had fallen a lot so it was harder to make a good profit so now he sells cocaine and heroin too. He said that if any of my customers wanted drugs I could phone him and he would deliver. He said he was like Domino pizza and that if he didn’t deliver within thirty minutes it was free. I didn’t understand and he said that he was joking. Domino is a pizza company in London and if they take more than thirty minutes then they give you the pizza free. Vince doesn’t give his drugs for free, though. That was a joke. Some of my customers do ask if I have drugs but I always say no. It’s usually Americans who ask me and they want cocaine. Vince said he would sell to me at a good price and then I could charge the Americans what I wanted because they wouldn’t know how much drugs cost in London. He gave me his business card. It said CANDYMAN and had a mobile phone number. Vince said he was the Candyman.

I actually liked Vince. He was so different from the way he looked. I suppose it is like people say, you cannot judge a book by its cover. We talked about that expression last time I was at school. It means things aren’t always the way they appear. It’s like when I walk into a hotel. I am dressed well and carry an expensive handbag and so everyone assumes that I am a rich tourist. I think a lot of people would look at Vince and think that he was a dangerous thug but in fact he is really nice and quite gentle.

I told Vince that we were alike in that we both sold people what they wanted but that really we were breaking the law when we did it. He laughed and said that there was a big difference because actually prostitution wasn’t illegal. I said he was wrong because if it was legal then more people would be doing it. Vince said that in fact being a prostitute isn’t against the law in England. It’s okay for a man to pay for sex with a girl, there is nothing illegal about that. What is illegal is if a girl goes around offering sex for money. That is illegal which is why the police don’t want prostitutes walking on the streets. One girl working on her own was okay, but Vince said that if there were more than one girl working in the same flat then it was called a brothel and that was against the law. I said that was why Oliver said that we all had to have our own apartments. Vince asked me some questions about Oliver but I said I’d better not talk about him and Vince said that he understood. He said that sometimes the police did arrest the people who ran the agencies because they were pimps. I said that Oliver wasn’t a pimp, he just found customers for us. Vince thought that was funny. He said a pimp was someone who controlled prostitutes and that included the people who ran escort agencies. So the police could arrest Oliver if they wanted, but not me. But Vince said the police didn’t bother prosecuting escort agencies because they were happy that the girls weren’t walking the streets. Vince seems to know a lot about working girls. He seems to know a lot about everything. It was funny because when I was talking to him I didn’t feel like I was talking to a customer. He was more like a friend. And he made me laugh. He asked me if I wanted some cocaine and I said no. I have never taken drugs, ever. Some of my friends in Udon Thani took ecstasy and some smoked Ya Bar, but I have never taken drugs and I don’t think I ever will. In Thailand they kill people for selling drugs.

Belinda

2007-09-05T01:56:00.000-07:00

Sandra phoned me yesterday morning and asked me if I’d go with her to see Belinda. I said okay and she came around to my flat and then we went to buy some fruit and chocolates and then we went to Belinda’s flat which is in Paddington, close to Edgware Road. Actually it is not far from Nancy’s apartment but it is much nicer. It is a two bedroom flat in a new block and all the furniture was new and it had a flat screen television. I think Belinda must be paying a lot in rent.

Belinda’s eye looked really bad. The skin was almost green and she had a plaster over the cut. She was happy so see us but she said that she hated Alice and that if she ever saw her again she would kill her. Sandra asked her when she was going to start working again and Belinda said she didn’t know but Oliver had said that she couldn’t work until her eye looked okay. She went into her bedroom and came out with an envelope full of money which she gave to Sandra. Sandra counted it. There was £3,000. Belinda said she would give Sandra more money when she was working again.

Belinda kept saying bad things about Alice but I just smiled and nodded because I didn’t want to get involved. I have no problem with Belinda but I have no problem with Alice, either. Then Belinda said that she might stop working for the agency and that surprised me. I said that I didn’t think that Oliver would be happy if she went to another agency but she said she didn’t mean that, she meant she would start working on her own. Sandra said working on your own was stupid because then you had no one to take care of you but Belinda laughed and pointed at her black eye and said that Oliver couldn’t even protect her from one of his own girls. She said it was easy to work for yourself. All you needed was a website, and that only cost a few hundred pounds. On the website you had sexy photographs and your phone number and then customers called you instead of calling an agency. That meant that you got to keep all the money that the customer gave you.

I could see that Sandra was getting worried. I think she was scared that Belinda might run away and she wouldn’t get her money back. Sandra kept saying that it was better to work for an agency but I think that Belinda had a point, especially if she had a customer like the American banker who bought her the Rolex watch. If you had three or four customers like him you would hardly have to work to get really big money.

Anyway, we ate some fruit and Belinda made some Chinese tea and then we sang some karaoke songs. I asked her about her family and she said that her mother and father lived near Udon Thani but I don’t think she is telling the truth. I think she is from Laos, but I don’t know why she is lying. Maybe she is ashamed that she comes from Laos.

I asked her about the American banker and why he gave her so much money. She laughed and said it was because she had made him fall in love with her. I didn’t understand. I thought that maybe she was talking about the GFE but it was more than that. She said that she had gone to an old lady who lived near her village, a sort of medicine woman who could heal people and tell fortunes. Belinda said she had paid the old woman five hundred dollars for a magic potion. I thought she meant five hundred baht but no, she really did mean five hundred dollars. The potion was in a tiny perfume bottle. She showed it to us. It was black glass with a metal stopper. Belinda said that if you put a small drop of it on your skin and then let a man smell it within three minutes, then he would fall in love with you. Well, not love exactly, but whenever he thought of you from then on for the rest of his live he would want to have sex with you. It didn’t matter if he was married or if he loved someone else, he would always, always, want to have sex with you. Belinda said that whenever she met a rich customer she used the perfume and every time she had used it the man had come back to see her. She showed us her mobile phone. There were lots of messages from America, from the banker, saying that he loved her. And there were more messages from a man in Italy who said that he didn’t love his wife anymore and that he wanted to marry Belinda. Belinda laughed and said that the potion had never failed her. When I heard that I was sure that she wasn’t from Thailand. Magic like that doesn’t happen in Thailand but I have heard of it happening in Laos and Cambodia.

On our way home, Sandra said that she thought Belinda was stupid and that there would be big problems if she worked on her own. There were robbers who robbed working girls who worked alone and sometimes the immigration people would go to check their visas. It was safer being with an agency, she said. I could see that she was worried but I didn’t know what to say to make her feel better. She said she would tell Oliver that Belinda was planning to work on her own. I didn’t think that was fair but I didn’t say anything. Actually, I would be happy if Belinda left the agency because then the only girl who will be earning more than me will be Alice.

Something very funny happened when I got back to my flat. Oliver rang me to say that a customer wanted to book me for two hours and that he wanted me to wear my rubber dress. The red one that shows my breasts. I said okay, even though I didn’t like wearing it. It’s really hard to get on and it feels so uncomfortable. I have to use lots of talcum powder to get it on and it sticks to my skin. Ten minutes later Oliver phoned again to say that the customer also wanted me to wear the thigh-length boots I have. I’m wearing them in some of the photographs on the agency’s website. They’re made of shiny plastic and they have very high heels. I said okay. Then ten minutes later Oliver phoned again asking if I still have the dog collar. In one of the photographs I’m wearing a dog collar with spikes on it. It was Cat’s idea. She said it was sexy. I told Oliver that I didn’t have the dog collar, it belonged to the photographer, and Oliver said okay. Then five minutes later he phoned me back. The customer had cancelled. I didn’t understand it. I had the dress, I had the boots, but because I didn’t have the dog collar he cancelled? Oliver said it was because the customer wanted me to crawl around in the boots and the dress and bark like a dog. I laughed so much. I mean, how crazy can some men be?

I didn’t worry too much because I had three customers one after the other, one at two o’clock, one at half past three and one at five o’clock. I think I am busy because Nancy and Sandra have their periods again. Then at seven o’clock Oliver rang me to say that Robert had booked me for four hours outcall. Just as I was getting ready to go to Robert’s house I got a text from Simon. He said that he’d tried to book me but the agency said I was busy. I sent him a text back saying I was sorry but that I would be available tomorrow and that I missed him. I always say ‘available’ and I never say ‘I am free’ because then the customer might get the wrong idea. I am never free. I am a working girl and men have to pay to see me. Then I sent Robert a text message. ‘I am coming now, Daddy,’ I said. ‘I will be a good girl for you.’ I wished that I had had some of Belinda’s magic potion, then I would have Robert as my customer for ever.

Kung

2007-09-04T02:11:00.000-07:00

Kung phoned me twenty times yesterday. He knows that I can see his number when he has phoned so it’s just stupid to call me so much. And what did he want to talk about? Money. He needs more money to pay the bank and to pay the builders. They are doing the kitchen now and it will cost more than 700,000 baht in total, which is more than £10,000. When I first came to England I missed Kung a lot and I was always happy to talk to him but now I think he doesn’t care about me, he just cares about money. I sent him £1,000 by Western Union this week and £1,200 last week and he is still asking for more. He never asks how I am or tells me that I miss him and when I ask him when he will leave his wife he says that he doesn’t want to talk about that until the house is finished. He doesn’t even ask why I have so much money now. He thinks I am working in a restaurant but he must realise that I can’t be earning so much by serving food. I don’t think he cares what I am doing, he just wants my money. Before we used to share the cost of the house but now I think I am paying for everything.

I answered the phone when I woke up and all he said was ‘call me back’. I did call him back but I don’t think that’s fair. If he wants to talk to me he should pay for the call. Then all he did was ask for more money. I really don’t think he loves me any more but I’m not sure what I can do. I have so much of my money in the house we are building and he did all the paperwork so I am not sure what he will do if I say that I want to split up with him. Maybe he will try to keep the house. I think when we have finished the house will be worth about 2,500,000 baht which is about £40,000. Maybe if I tell him I will give him £20,000 he will let me have the house for myself. I am scared to ask him in case he says no and steals the house from me, so I just keep sending him money.

After I had spoken to Kung I went to school. I was so tired but I don’t like it when John calls and scolds me for not going so I will try to go at least two or three times a week. A new girl has joined our class and she is from Thailand, too. From Sara Buri. She is quite pretty and we had a soft drink together during a break and we talked about Thailand and how much we miss it. She was complaining about London being so expensive. She is working in a restaurant and I wondered if I should tell her about the agency but then I thought I would wait until I know her better. John saw me and smiled and said ‘hello stranger’ and asked me if I wanted to have a coffee after school but I lied and said that I had to go shopping with my friends.

I had four customers yesterday. They were all new customers and they all stayed for one hour each. All four of them asked me for my phone number, can you believe that! Two of them were quite nice and I gave them my phone number but I didn’t like the other two so much so I said no, that my agency wouldn’t allow that.

Both of them sent me text messages after they had gone, telling me how happy they were to have met me. It was funny because they used almost exactly the same words. One said ‘I had such a great time with you, you made me so happy, Tom ‘ and the other said ‘It was great meeting you, now I am so happy, Dave’. I sent them both the same message. ‘Thanks, honey. I hope to see you again soon’. Last thing at night I sent messages to ten customers, including Tom and Dave. ‘Good night, baby. I miss you.’ When I woke up, eight of them had sent me messages back. Simon messaged me twice and said that he would come to see me very soon.

Fighting

2007-09-03T01:34:00.000-07:00

Last night something terrible happened. Really terrible. It was the worst thing that has happened to me since I came to England. There was a fight between Alice and Belinda and now Belinda is hurt and Oliver is mad at everyone. I was so scared that I was shaking because I have never seen people fighting like that. Not girls, anyway. I went to a Muay Thai boxing match with Kung once in Udon Thani but I have never seen girls fighting before.

We had all gone to the Sloane Square flat and were showing Oliver our books and giving him our money. I was really pleased because I had had a good week. I didn’t earn quite as much as last week but I had £1,800 for him which was a lot of money. I had already spoken to Nancy and Sandra so I knew that I had earned a lot more than them. Nancy had only £950 because she is still spending a lot of time with her boyfriend and Sandra had £1,600. Alice had £2,500 for Oliver and was really pleased with herself because she had much more than everyone else. Candy had £1,700, Wanda had £1,400 and Vicky had £1,350. Cat was cooking Thai food in the kitchen and I had brought a huge watermelon, one of the biggest I had ever seen. I was cutting the watermelon into slices when Belinda arrived.

Belinda was grinning and she took her money out of an envelope and waved it around before giving it to Oliver. She gave him £2,800. We were all very surprised. That meant that she had earned £8,400 in one week. I asked her how she had earned so much and she said that a customer had booked her for three days. Not three overnights but for three full days and three nights. Oliver had charged him £2,100 for each day which meant that the customer had paid her £6,300. I couldn’t believe it. Why would a man pay a girl £6,300 to be with him for three days? Belinda said he was really rich. He worked for a big bank in New York and he earned millions of dollars a year. He had seen Belinda last week and liked her so much that he had come back to see her especially. He had flown first class and was staying at the Marriott Hotel but he spent all his time with her in her flat in Paddington. They went shopping and went for dinner and she said they only had sex five times over the three days. And she said he was coming to see her again in the next week or two. He had bought her two Chanel bags and a Rolex watch. She showed everybody her watch. It was gold and studded with small diamonds. I was so jealous. I would love to have a customer like that.

I could see that Alice wasn’t happy. She kept glaring at Belinda like she was angry with her, but she didn’t say anything. Everybody was asking questions about Belinda’s customer because I think they wanted him to be their customer, too. Belinda was laughing and saying that he was old and bald and fat and had five children and that she was younger than all his children. I don’t know why old men want to be with young girls so much. I would think that being with a young girl would just make them feel old. Maybe it doesn’t. Maybe having sex with a young girl makes them feel young again.

We ate the food that Cat had cooked and everybody said how tasty my watermelon was. Then after we had eaten the food we started to play cards. That was when the trouble started. We were playing Pok Gow as always and we were taking it in turns to deal. When it was Alice’s turn to be the dealer, she gave everybody two cards. Then she gave Belinda a third card. Belinda picked it up but said that she didn’t want it. Alice said that she had touched it so she had to have it but Belinda said she didn’t want it. She turned over her cards to show that she had the king and seven of hearts and she said that there’s no way that she would have wanted a third card. Then Alice said that Belinda was cheating and Belinda said that a dog could go and fuck her mother and then Alice threw the pack of cards at Belinda and screamed that she was a whore which was pretty funny actually because really we are all whores.

Belinda was drinking whiskey and coke and she picked up her glass and threw it over Alice. Alice picked up the bottle of beer that Oliver had been drinking and hit Belinda across the face with it. The bottle broke and there was blood everywhere. They were both screaming and Belinda grabbed Alice’s hair and pulled out a big chunk of it. Nancy was crying and Sandra was yelling at Alice and trying to pull her away from Belinda. Oliver stood up and forced himself between the two of them and shouted at them. It was the first time I had ever seen Oliver angry.

He told Alice to go into one of the bedrooms. She was very angry and shouted at him that it wasn’t fair, that he was sending all the best customers to Belinda but Oliver said he wasn’t going to argue with her and the she had to go to the room. Alice did as she was told.

Cat got a wet cloth from the kitchen and cleaned the cut on Belinda’s forehead. It was next to her eye and it wasn’t too bad a cut but her eye is going to be really bruised. She was still angry and wanted to fight Alice but Oliver told her that it was over and that there was to be no more fighting. He was very angry. He said that Belinda wouldn’t be able to work until the bruises had gone and the cut had healed. That got Sandra angry because she is the one who paid for Belinda’s contract. She said that Belinda had to work because she had to pay back the money she owed Sandra. Oliver said that she couldn’t work because a customer might think that Oliver had hit Belinda and report him to the police. The police didn’t worry about girls working but they did care when they got hurt. That got Sandra angry so she took off her shoe and tried to get into the room where Alice was to hit her but Cat stopped her. The Sandra tried to hit Cat but Vicky and Wanda pulled her away and took the shoe off her.

Oliver said that Sandra had to take Belinda home. When they had gone, Oliver went into the bedroom to talk to Alice. We couldn’t hear what he said to her but he was in there for half an hour and then she came out and she was crying and she went home.

The rest of us played cards but we were all very quiet and all a bit shocked by what had happened. Oliver said that we weren’t to worry, that it would be all right.

I don’t know why they were fighting. We are all working girls, we should be a team, we should be helping each other not fighting each other. We finished playing cards quite early and I went home with Nancy and stayed with her. I was just about to go to sleep when her doorbell rang. It was her boyfriend. Her kik. His name is Chris and he is nineteen and quite good looking. I didn’t want to stay there while he was there so I went home. Kung kept phoning me but I didn’t answer the phone. I set it to silent so that I could sleep.

The book

2007-09-02T02:06:00.000-07:00

I have been an escort for two months. I can hardly believe it. Two months. When I first started doing this job I cried a lot but now I hardly cry at all. Sometimes I cry if a customer is not nice to me and I cry when I miss my son, but I don’t cry all the time like I used to. Sometimes I even enjoy the job. Some of my customers are quite young and handsome and are good at sex, and some of them make me laugh and some tell me things I didn’t know. I always ask them about their jobs and if there’s something I don’t understand about England they can explain things for me.

You know, I can’t remember all the customers that I have seen over the past two months, even though I have all their names. It was Cat who showed me how to keep a book of my customers. I have a book with Mickey Mouse on the cover because my son Daeng loves Mickey Mouse and it always makes me smile when I look at it. I keep the book in the kitchen drawer where I keep my knives and forks. That was where I used to keep my money but now I hide my money somewhere else in my room. I don’t tell anyone where I hide my money.

The book is very important. All the girls at the agency have to keep a book and we take the books with us to the Sloane Square flat when we go to see Oliver and Cat on Sunday night. Cat showed me how to divide the pages up into eight columns. In the first column you put the date. In the second column you put the name of the customer. Then you put the time you met the customer and the time he left. Or the time you left if it was outcall. Then you put how many hours you spent with the customer. Then there’s a column where you write ‘I’ for incall or ‘O’ for outcall. Then you write down how much he paid you. Then in the last column you write down how much commission you have to pay Oliver. At the end of every week you draw a line across the page and add up how much commission Oliver is to get.

So far I have paid Oliver a bit more than £9,000. Do you know how many customers I have had? Can you guess? One hundred and twelve. I couldn’t believe it when I added them up. One hundred and twelve. Before I came to England I had made love to a boy at school when I was eighteen, then Daeng’s father, and then Kung. Three men. That was all. And when I was working at the Thai restaurant in Camden I never had a boyfriend, even though a lot of the customers would ask me out. I was a good girl.

I didn’t have sex with all one hundred and twelve men, of course. Some didn’t want sex. Some wanted just oral or a massage and of course there is Robert who just likes to kiss my feet. But most of the men want to have sex so I think I have almost certainly had sex with more than eighty men. Maybe ninety. I wonder what it would look like if they were all standing together in one room. I think we would need a very big room!

Simon came to see me last night. He booked me for two hours and he brought a pizza and some DVDs with him. The first time he came to see me I had told him that I liked action movies so he bought Die Hard 3 and Déjà Vu. I had seen Die Hard 3 but I hadn’t seen Déjà Vu so we watched it and ate pizza and I opened a bottle of wine. We sat on the sofa and he put his arm around me which was nice. When the movie had finished he wanted to go into the bedroom but I said that we didn’t have time because his two hours was almost up. He looked a bit sad and said that he wanted to make love to me and I said that I wanted to make love to him too but that if we did he would have to book more time with the agency. I could see he wasn’t happy so I kissed him and said that he had to understand me. I was a working girl and so if he wanted more than two hours he would have to speak to the agency. I kissed him again and rubbed myself against him and he laughed and said okay. He phoned Oliver and booked me for another hour and Oliver gave him a discount because it was his third hour so he only had to pay another £120. I gave him a massage and then gave him oral. He came really quickly so we didn’t get to make love. I feel a bit sorry for Simon because he has such a small dick. I think it must be really difficult for him to get a girlfriend. I know some people say that a size of a man’s dick isn’t important and in a way that is true. It’s not important unless it’s really, really small, and Simon’s is really, really small. But he is a nice man. He let me keep the DVDs because he said he’d bought them for me. Just before I went to sleep I got a text message from him saying that he missed me and that he wanted me to have sweet dreams. I sent him a message saying ‘good night, darling’ and sent it to six other customers, too. Then I sent a good night message to Robert, but I called him Daddy. He’s the only customer that I call Daddy. Robert sent me a message back saying that he missed me and that he’d see me soon. Robert is the perfect customer. I am so lucky to have him.

School

2007-09-01T02:47:00.000-07:00

John keeps phoning me and asking me why I am not going to school. The reason is that I am very busy and often I am working until very late at night so I do not get up until mid-day. I told him I was sick with a cold and he said he could come around with some medicine and some food for me but I told him that a girlfriend was taking care of me. I said I would try to go to school next week. I really will try but I am so busy now. I usually see two or three customers a day and sometimes as many as five or six. John says that if I keep missing lessons I will never learn, but actually my English is already very good. I don’t let the teachers know that, though. Often when I am in school I pretend that my English is bad and I don’t speak a lot. Actually, my English is better than almost all the students at the school. I only got the visa to be an English student so that I could go to England. I don’t think I really need to go to school at all. In Thailand I studied very hard.

I studied at Ramkhamhaeng Univeristy, which is quite famous in Thailand. If I tell you how many students are at the university you will be shocked. Half a million! Really. That is how many students go to Ramkhamhaeng. It is what is called an open university and anyone can go if they want to. Actually, I found out that Vicky also went to Ramkhamhaeng University. She studied Mass Communication but she did not finish her degree. She studied for six years, she said, but she was lazy. I studied for four years and got my Bachelor of Business Administration and I was studying for my Master of Business Administration when Kung’s wife found out that I was his Mia Noi and I had to leave Thailand.

Ramkhamhaeng is named after a famous king who created the Thai alphabet. The main university is in Bangkok but I studied in Udon Thani. You can study all over the country but the teachers are in Bangkok. Vicky studied near her home in Buri Ram. You go to your local campus to study and see you the teachers live on a satellite link. Then on Saturdays and Sundays sometimes the teachers come to where you are so you can see them face to face.

A lot of students at Ramkhamhaeng are lazy and do not study. Most of my classmates never did any homework and were always asking me for advice on their work. I studied very hard because I thought if I had a degree and a masters then I could get a good job. I didn’t know that I would be doing this job, that’s for sure! An escort does not need a degree or a masters, she just needs to be pretty and give a GFE.

I studied for my degree but I also went to a language school in Udon Thani to learn English. I knew that it was important to be able to speak English and to read and write it really well. English is the most important language in the world, I think. Maybe one day Chinese will be more important, but not now. A lot of my friends can speak English quite well because speaking English is not too difficult. In fact I think it is easier to speak English than to speak Thai. Sandra speaks really good English and she says she learned it from her customers. And Nancy knows lots of slang and swear words. She keeps saying ‘innit?’ which sort of means ‘isn’t it?’ or ‘chai mai?’ in Thai. But Sandra and Nancy can hardly write English at all. I studied English every day and I watched American movies. I bought a lot of DVDs with subtitles and I always read the English subtitles while I watched the DVDs. Also I kept a diary in English. I started when I was eighteen and every day I would write what I did in English. It was very hard at first but I got better and better and now I think I write English very well. It is like most things. If you want to do them well you have to work hard at it. It is the same with my job now. If I want to do it well and earn a lot of money then I have to try hard. I do not really like being an escort but now that I am doing it I want to do it well.

Football

2007-08-31T10:51:00.000-07:00

Sandra phoned me yesterday morning really excited because a Thai footballer is going to be playing for Manchester City. Sandra loves football. She supports Liverpool but says that now she might support Manchester City. Manchester City is owned by the former Prime Minister of Thailand, Khun Thaksin. He tried to buy Liverpool once but I don’t think he had enough money. Now he owns Manchester City instead. Sandra said he told the club to try three Thai players and now they have decided that one of them can play for the team. Sandra said that all Thai people should be proud. His name is Suree Sukha and in Thailand he plays for Chonburi Football Club. He is a defender and he is the first Thai to play for a big team in England.

I think it is a good thing that he is playing for Manchester City. Some of the customers who come to see me have been to Thailand but all they seem to know about are the go-go bars and the massage parlours. They know nothing about the history of my country. They seem to think that every Thai girl is a bar girl and that is not true. If Suree plays well then he will make everybody proud of Thailand.

I do not like football much. Kung always used to watch games and he liked to gamble, but I didn’t think it was very exciting. But I am happy that a Thai player is playing in England and I think now that I will watch Manchester City when they play. I saw on the television news that Manchester has had six earthquakes this month. I hope that is not a bad sign.

Thailand does not have many sporting heroes. Not really. We have Tiger Woods because his mum was Thai but most people just think he’s a black American. He doesn’t speak Thai and he doesn’t come to Thailand much. I don’t think he sees his mum a lot.

We have a tennis player called Paradorn who has played at Wimbledon but never won. Thai people really like Paradorn because he is proud of our country. Before he plays he always wais the four corners of the stadium. A wai is what Thai people do to show respect. We put our hands together and bow a bit. We wai monks and our parents and Thai people are always happy when we see Paradorn wai. He used to go out with a Thai singer called Tata Young but they broke up after people blamed her for him not playing very well.

Before I went to sleep I got a text message from Simon, wishing me a good night. I sent him a message saying that I missed him and then he sent me a message asking me if I wanted to see a movie with over the weekend. I sent him a message saying that he would have to book me through the agency. Then I sent a text message to Robert, to say that I hoped I would dream about him. I called him ‘Daddy’ because I know that he likes that. Just before I fell asleep I got a message from Gordon saying that he missed me. I couldn’t remember who Gordon was but I sent him a text message back saying that I missed him and hoped to see him soon. I wish that I’d asked Peter from Hong Kong for his number. He was rich and a nice man and I’d like him to be a regular customer. I hope that he books me again next time he’s in London.

Robert

2007-08-30T02:59:00.000-07:00

I went to see Robert yesterday. He booked me for four hours again. He always does the same thing. He gives me peanut butter sandwiches and a glass of milk and then kisses and licks my feet. It’s so strange. Really, I would like to do more for him. I would like to make him happy because he is such a nice man. He is fifty years old and he has never had a wife. He lived with his mother but she died three years ago. She was very rich and she left him all her money. The house is huge. It has six bedrooms and a big garden and is full of really nice furniture and paintings. He lives there all alone. He has two maids who come in and clean the house and he can’t really cook so he phones restaurants and they bring food to him. He has had girlfriends, he said, but he has never met a woman he wants to marry. He says he doesn’t really want a wife but he wants a daughter. Yesterday I said he could make love to me if he wanted to but he said he didn’t. He makes himself come while he kisses my feet. He said he uses Asian girls from lots of agencies but he likes me the best. I said I liked him to and that he was my favourite customer which made him smile. He has a job working for a bank, but he says that he doesn’t work for the money because he has enough of that. His mother owned a jewellery store somewhere and he was her only child. Actually I think she owned quite a few jewellery stores.

He is very clever. He went to Eton which is a famous school where the Royal Family sends its sons and then he went to Cambridge which is one of the best universities in England. He makes me laugh and he seems very kind. I think he would make a very good husband for some girl. I asked him if he wanted a wife because I have friends in Udon Thani who would make really good wives but he said he was happy being single. A lot of girls in Udon Thani have married farangs but they are not as nice as Robert or as rich. Most girls in Udon Thani seem to marry old and fat farangs with very little money. I don’t think the girls marry for love, I think they marry because they want a farang husband to take care of them and their families. But if they want someone to take care of them, why marry a farang who is poor? Why don’t they look for a rich farang? I think the farangs who live in Udon Thani live there because it’s cheap. That means they have little money. I don’t think I would marry a farang with little money. I might marry a farang with a lot of money if he could take care of me, but if I did marry a farang I think I would live in his country.

I have a friend called Poy who lives in Udon Thani. She is a school teacher and she has long hair and is quite pretty. She is thirty and has never married and she would be perfect for Robert. Poy can cook and she is very kind and I know she would take very good care of him. I think I will phone Poy and ask her to send me a photograph of herself and I will show it to him.

Before I came to London I never thought of marrying a farang. I always thought I would marry a Thai. Really, I thought Kung would divorce his wife and marry me but even if that didn’t happen I thought I would marry another Thai man. But now I think that I could marry a farang. If I met the right one. I don’t think I could marry a farang just for money, though. I think I would have to love him first. And he would have to love me and my son.

New photographs

2007-08-29T08:41:00.000-07:00

Cat took me to get some more photographs taken yesterday. She said that my pictures on the website weren’t sexy enough. The photographer’s studio is in West Kensington. He’s a nice man called Thomas and I think he might be gay. Cat had two dresses for me. At first I laughed when I saw them. One was a shiny black rubber dress that covered my breasts but hardly covered my backside. The other was a red vinyl dress that was also short but which had holes cut out for my breasts. Can you believe that? When I put it on, my breasts were sticking out! I thought it looked silly but Cat said it was very sexy. When I saw the photographs I realised that she was right. The idea is to get customers to come to see me so the more sexy the pictures are, the more they will want to have sex with me. I just hope that nobody in Thailand ever sees the pictures. If Kung saw them I would die of embarrassment.

Cat said I should buy the dresses and she sold them to me for £300. She said that customers would see the dresses on the website and ask that I wear them when they came to see me. It makes it sexier for them, she said. The new pictures should be on the website by the end of the week.

I had three customers yesterday. The first one came at three o’clock. His name was Simon and he was about thirty five and wore a really nice suit. He was quite handsome but he had the smallest dick I had ever seen. It couldn’t have been more than two inches long. It got hard and he came okay but it was so small that I could hardly feel it and I kept worrying that the condom would come off. I didn’t mention how small he was and neither did he but I think we were both thinking about it. I felt sorry for him. I mean, if a girl has small breasts she can get implants, but there’s nothing a guy can do about a small dick. I asked him if he would give me his phone number because I liked him and he was so pleased. I’m glad I made him happy. Before I went to sleep I sent him a text saying that I missed him, but he didn’t reply.

The second customer came for two hours. I gave him champagne and kissed him and then took him into the bathroom so that we could have a bath together. I bought some bubble bath and now I ask all my customers if they want to have a bath with me because that way I am sure they are clean but it’s also really easy to make them come in the bath, just using your hands. You pour shower gel over them and massage them and squeeze and they come. Then I tell them I’ll give them a massage in the bedroom and often that’s all they want. Or maybe oral sex. Easy money! Anyway, this customer was called Eric and he wasn’t too tall, just a bit fat, but when he took off his clothes he had the biggest dick I had ever seen in my life. I am serious. I went from Simon with two inches to Eric who was at least a foot-long. And he was as thick as my arm, the bit from my wrist to my elbow. In fact I think he was even thicker than my arm. I couldn’t take my eyes off it. He seemed quite proud of how big it was and said that a lot of Asian girls said that he was too big. I said I thought he was right, but that I would try. He didn’t want me to make him come in the bath so we made love in the bedroom. I used a lot of KY Jelly and asked him to be very slow and it was okay. Actually I quite liked it. After a minute or so he started moving quite fast and I almost came but afterwards I was a bit sore. I’m glad all my customers aren’t as big as Eric, that’s for sure. I wouldn’t be able to walk.

The third customer came just after midnight. His name was Matt and he had his name tattooed in Thai on his arm, plus a tattoo of a Buddha’s head. I think it is wrong to have a Buddha tattoo, it is not supposed to be a decoration. I didn’t like Matt. He kept trying to speak to me in Thai but I pretended not to understand. I told him I was from Malaysia. He said he had been to Thailand many times and that he loved Thai girls but I think he just liked sex. He was a bit ugly and fat so I don’t think he would find it easy to get a girlfriend in London. He had no class and he swore a lot. He said he had been to Thailand many times but the only place he had been to was Pattaya. Pattaya has a lot of prostitutes and farangs go there for sex. Matt said he liked Pattaya because in Pattaya he could have sex for just £10. He stayed for one hour and didn’t give me a tip. He asked me for my phone number and said that he would take me out for a Thai meal but I said I wasn’t allowed to give a customer my number but the real reason was that I didn’t want to see him again. He made me feel like a prostitute, and I don’t like that. I’m not a prostitute selling sex for £10 in Pattaya. I am an escort and yes I sell my body but it’s not the same.

Why no Russians?

2007-08-27T03:57:00.000-07:00

Oliver was funny yesterday. He was very happy because we had a lot of money for him and he got a bit drunk. I think Cat was a bit annoyed at him because for the first time he actually lost at cards. I lost too but Belinda and Nancy both won a lot. I think Nancy left with more than £3,000 and Belinda had about £1,000. Oliver lost a lot but I don’t know how much. I lost as well but I don’t want to say how much. But it was a lot. Okay, I will say. I lost £900. I know I am stupid but I earned a lot of money last week. My best week ever. And now I have paid Oliver and Cat what I owe them, I get to keep everything I earn, except for the commission I pay the agency, of course.

Because Oliver was in a good mood, I was able to ask him something that I have always wanted to know about the agency. Oliver is a Russian, but all the girls who work for him are Thai (except for Belinda who says she is Thai but I think she is from Laos). There are a lot of Russian working girls in London. I have seen them advertised on other websites. Some of them are very pretty. They are tall and have figures like models and have blonde hair or dark hair. I am sure they earn a lot of money because not every man likes Asian girls. So I wanted to know why Oliver doesn’t have any Russian girls working for him. I know it’s easy for him to get Thai girls working for him because Cat is Thai, but he can speak Russian and he understands Russians, so why doesn’t he hire Russian girls?

Oliver laughed. He said it was because Russian girls were difficult. He said they usually have boyfriends who take money from them and give them drugs. A lot of Russian girls take drugs, he said. Cocaine and heroin. That seems stupid to me. Why sell your body to make money and then throw your money away on drugs? That is crazy. And how can a boyfriend let his girlfriend sleep with other men? No real boyfriend could do that. Oliver said that the boyfriends are really pimps, they are only with the girl for the money they can get. That is crazy too. Why be a working girl just to give your money to a man? I understand working to get money for your family because that is what I am doing. But working to give your money to a boyfriend is stupid. Better he sells his own body, I think.

Oliver also said that Asian girls are better at the job because they give a GFE. I had never heard that before and he explained what it meant. Girl Friend Experience. It means that the customer thinks he is getting more than just a working girl, he thinks he is getting a girlfriend. A lot of Russian girls do not kiss and they will use a condom when they give oral sex. All the girls at Oliver’s agency give oral sex without condoms. If the man is clean then it’s not bad and the taste is actually better than the taste of condoms. Even the flavoured ones that I have don’t taste good, except for the chocolate flavour which is quite nice. Oliver said the Russian girls don’t speak good English and so can’t make their customers feel good. The Russian girls are very pretty but they are not cute, not cute like Thai girls. We have a word for it. Nar-rak. It means cute. Thai girls are nar-rak but Russian girls aren’t. If a customer gets a GFE then he will come back for more, is what Oliver says. And the more regular customers a girl has, the more money she will make. When a girl starts working, customers will come to see her because she is new and fresh. But there are always newer and fresher girls starting work. So a girl gets a lot of business when she starts work, but then less as she keeps on working. But if she is nar-rak and gives a GFE then she will get a lot of regular customers and keep on getting good money. Oliver talks a lot of sense. But I think he has another reason for only having Asian girls. I think he thinks we are easier to control. I think he knows that Russian girls, especially Russian girls with boyfriends, would be harder to control than Thai girls. And I have heard stories about the Russian Mafia in London. There are a lot of Russian gangsters in London so maybe he is scared of them.

Oliver is right about how important it is to have regular customers. I went to see Robert at his house twice last week, both times for four hours. That’s £690 each time. So in one week he gave me £1,380. I had to wear the school uniform and all he did was kiss my feet and give me sandwiches and milk. He is actually a nice man and I feel a bit sorry for him, but if he wasn’t giving the money to me he would be giving it to someone else. Every night I send him a text saying ‘Good night Daddy, I miss you’ and sometimes I send him a text in the morning saying that I had a dream about him.

Last week was my best week ever. I earned £5,700 which meant I get to keep £3,800 for myself and I gave £1,900 to Oliver. Alice and Belinda had the same amount for him – they both had £2,600. They both had really good weeks, Alice because a regular customer from America had booked her for three overnights and Belinda because she worked really hard. Wednesday she had ten customers. Can you believe that? Ten customers in one day? She must have been really sore.

Everyone else earned less than me. Candy had £1,600 and Nancy only had £800 because she is getting lazy now, I think. She prefers to spend time with her kik which means FFF which means she is not earning. Sandra had £1,500, Wanda had £1,300 and Vicky also had £1,300. I think if I try really hard that I can earn as much as Alice and Belinda. I am going to do what Oliver suggests and really try hard at the GFE.

Cheating

2007-08-25T02:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a busy day. Oliver phoned me at two o’clock in the afternoon and told me that I had a booking for three o’clock and that the customer’s name was John and that he wanted me to wear school uniform. John said that he was a teacher and he wanted me to call him Sir while he made love to me. It was funny because I kept thinking about John at my language school and that made me want to laugh. John wasn’t a very nice man and he was a bit rough with me. I think he enjoyed hurting me.

Then Oliver phoned me again at five o’clock to tell me that I had a two-hour booking for five-thirty. His name was Gordon. Gordon was nice. He was about forty and a bit fat but he had a nice smile and he kept saying how pretty I was. He didn’t even want to make love to me, he just wanted to eat me and he ate me for more than an hour. He actually made me come and that was a surprise because I hardly ever come when a customer does that to me. Sometimes I come when a customer makes love to me but that’s usually if I’m thinking about sex with Kung. Gordon made me laugh, too. He kissed me when he went and said that he’d see me again and that made me happy. I gave him my phone number and said that he could call me if he wanted and he seemed really pleased. He paid me £300 for the two hours and afterwards he gave me a fifty pound tip.

We always have to ask for the money before we do anything. I feel a bit shy doing that but Oliver says that if we don’t the customer might try to get sex for free. They will have sex and then say that they haven’t got any money and that they have to go to the ATM and then you never see them again. That happened to Nancy once. A customer stayed for four hours and he was so nice looking that she didn’t ask him for the money. He had sex with her lots of times and he drank a whole bottle of wine while he was there. Then he said that he didn’t have enough money but that he’d get some from the bank. She never saw him again. She told Oliver and he said that she still had to pay him his commission even though she hadn’t been paid and that didn’t seem fair to me.

Not long after Gordon had left Oliver phoned me again and said that I had a booking for three hours. I was really happy because that meant I would be working for six hours in the day but only with three customers. Gordon hadn’t made love to me which was good because I was a bit sore after John had left. Anyway, the third customer was called Richard and he paid me straight away and he asked me if I’d give him a bubble bath. I hadn’t done that before and I didn’t have any bubble stuff but I said I would have a bath with him. I cleaned him and then started to massage him between the legs and then he said he wanted to make love so we had sex in the bath with me on top. I was funny because water started to go everywhere. He came really quickly but his dick stayed hard. Really hard. I dried him with a towel and then we went to the bedroom and he made love to me again, this time doggy-style which I don’t really like because it goes in really deep and hurts a bit. It took him longer to come this time, but he was still hard. I gave him a massage and then he wanted to make love again, this time on top of me. He put my legs over his shoulders and he was so deep that there were tears in my eyes. He wasn’t rough, though, not like the teacher had been, but he was quite big and he pushed really deep inside me.

When he’d finished I thought that would be it. Most men can come twice, especially if I am really sexy with them, but not many can manage three times. But Richard was still hard and after five minutes he was doing it again, this time with me on top. He made me make love to him for almost half an hour and I was exhausted, and then finally he came. Then he said he wanted another bath and I thought that meant he wanted to shower and then go home, but no, he wanted me in the bath with him and he made love to me again.

In all he made love to me eight times in three hours and he was as hard at the end as he was at the start. I could barely walk and I was so sore. After he had gone I phoned Oliver and said that I couldn’t see any more customers. I told him that Richard had had sex with me eight times and Oliver laughed. He said that he had probably been taking Viagra. I thought Oliver was joking. Why would a customer take Viagra before going to see a working girl? Our job is to make them feel good and to have sex with them, why would they need to take a pill? Oliver said some customers wanted to get value for money so they took Viagra before going to see the girl. That way they could have sex lots of times.

That didn’t seem fair to me. It’s like cheating. He paid me for three hours but he had sex eight times. He paid me £480 for the three hours so that works out at just £60 for sex. That’s too cheap. I wouldn’t have sex with a man for £60, not when I have to give one third of what I earn to the agency. It means he paid me just £40 each time we had sex.

Oliver said that Viagra can make men go red in the face and it makes them sniff as if they have a cold, so the next time a customer comes with a red face and a sniff I’ll ask them if they have taken Viagra and if they have then I won’t see them. Or I’ll ask them to pay more money.

Shopping

2007-08-22T07:54:00.000-07:00

It’s funny the things you have to buy when you work as an escort. There’s clothes, obviously. Sexy underwear and stockings. Then there’s uniforms. I have two schoolgirl uniforms now – short skirts and tight white blouses and neckties – and I have a white vinyl nurse’s uniform and a net bodysuit that I bought from Ann Summers. And I have to wear nice dresses when I do outcall. Then there were the sex toys that I bought. Sometimes customers ask if I have a dildo and they are happy when I show them that I have three.

Then there’s condoms and KY jelly, of course. I use at least one condom with each customer, but sometimes I might use two or three. Say the customer wants to have sex, then he wants oral, then he wants sex again, then he wants a massage, then he wants sex again. That’s three condoms, and that might happen in just one hour. So in a busy day if I see five customers it’s not unusual for me to use ten condoms.

I use a lot of candles, too, because they make the flat look romantic. I think a lot of customers are actually a bit shy so in the daytime I draw the curtains and use candles. I use six small candles in the bathroom and I have four big ones around the bedroom. The ones in the bathroom burn for about six hours and the big ones last for more than a day. I probably use more than eighty small candles a week and twenty-five big ones. I buy them from Woolworths in Edgware Road and they cost almost £100.

I use a lot of air fresheners. I have some of the plug-ins that you put in the electric sockets, and I have sprays, too.

I use a lot of soap powder. I do at least two loads of washing a day, mainly towels. I always do a load first thing in the morning and another load just before I go to sleep. At the weekends I do three or four loads. I am a bit worried what my electricity bill will be.

I ask my customers to shower first and most of them do. And most of them shower afterwards. I always shower after I have been with a customer. That means I use a lot of soap and bodywash, and shampoo. It costs me maybe £50 a week. And I need talcum powder, and good quality make-up. I put on fresh make-up before every customer and I use a lot of lipstick.

I have beer and wine and soft drinks in my fridge, and I have chocolates on my coffee table and crisps and nuts. Sometimes customers like to sit and talk before we go to the bedroom so I like to give them something to eat and drink. I have champagne in my fridge, Bollinger. If a customer books me for two hours or more than I offer them champagne. I have to pay for all the food and drink but Cat says it’s important because it makes the customers happy.

I spend a lot of money on movies, too. DVDs. A lot of time I am in the flat waiting for a customer to come, and it’s really boring. If Nancy isn’t working then I can go and stay with her but if she is busy then I have no choice but to wait on my own. I think there’s something wrong with the aerial on my television because the picture us really bad so once a week I go to Oxford Street and buy DVDs at the Virgin and HMV stores. I probably have fifty DVDs now.

It’s true that escorts earn a lot of money. I earn much more than I could ever earn doing a regular job, and probably a hundred times more than I could earn in Thailand. But I have to spend a lot, too.

Socks

2007-08-20T03:27:00.000-07:00

It worked! Robert sent me a text message saying that he missed me and I sent him one back that said ‘I miss you too, honey.’ Then about an hour after I sent the text message Oliver phoned me to say that Robert had booked me again for Sunday afternoon and that this time he wanted to see me for four hours! Four hours outcall costs the customer £690. Almost £700 and he doesn’t even want to have sex with me! He wanted me to wear the school uniform again and I did, though this time I went out to Marks and Spencer and bought some knee-length white socks, the sort that school kids wear. He loved the socks. This time he made a snack for me, peanut butter sandwiches and a glass of milk, and he sat in the kitchen and watched me eat it. I wasn’t really hungry but I ate the sandwiches and drank the milk because I could see that it made him happy. We went to his bedroom and this time he asked me to take off my top and my bra but he didn’t want me to take my panties off. He kissed me up and down my legs and then slid off the socks and spent an hour just licking my feet. He kept playing with himself and I said that I could do that for him but he said he didn’t want me to. All I had to do was lie there and let him kiss my feet. After he had come he lay down next to me and held me in his arms. When his time was up he gave me the £690 plus a £50 tip. He kissed me on top of the head and said that next time I saw him he wanted me to call him ‘Daddy’ which I thought was a bit strange but he is the customer so I’ll do whatever he wants to make him happy.

I went to the Sloane Square flat with Nancy. In the taxi I told her about Robert and she said that I should tell him that she was my young sister and that we could both go and see him. I said I’d ask him but I don’t think I will because I want to keep Robert as my own customer. I think Nancy would want to have sex with Robert and that’s not what he wants.

I had £1,600 to give Oliver. It was my best week ever. I had had earned £4,800 during the week, and £1,110 was from Robert. I am starting to understand how valuable regular customers are and why it is important to be nice to them. Robert had paid me £1,110 and I hadn’t even had to have sex with him. I would have to have sex with seven customers for one hour each to get the same money. At just before midnight I went to the bathroom and sent Robert a text message. ‘I miss you, Daddy’ is what I sent. I was sure that it would make him horny and sure enough, ten minutes later I got a text back from him. ‘I miss you too, baby. See you again soon.’ I hope he does book me again. It was easy money.

Alice was the top-earning girl again with £2,100 but Belinda was just behind her with £2,000. But everyone else earned less than me! Sandra had £1,200 for Oliver and Candy had £1,100. Nancy had just £900 because she had been spending time with her Kik. Kik is what we call a boyfriend sort-of, more like someone we have sex with for fun. Nancy has sex with the boy for free. FFF, she says. He’s nineteen like her and she showed me a picture on her phone. He is quite handsome, but I don’t understand why she gives away what we are supposed to be selling. Wanda had £1,000 and Vicky had £1,200 for Oliver I was so pleased to be earning more than Sandra and Candy because they are both really professional.

We ate Thai food and sang some karaoke and then we played cards. I wasn’t so lucky and lost £600.